Favorite things

Yesterday's dream post made me think of a few of my favorite things. Foods, food is a particular weakness of mine. I guess that's part of the charm of my restaurant gig. To me there is something fascinating about it all. Sushi is definitely at the top of my favorite foods. When I visited Dr. MG in Boston in October 2004 we ordered so much sushi they brougth it out on a boat, and we ate it all!!!!

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Mexican food, yummmmmm!!!! In college one of my favorite places to go was Los Arcos, 3 soft chicken tacos, ahhh memories.

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I appreciate Italian food! I like the seafood dishes best!!!

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Pizza, for me is definitely something I crave. Those puppy faces, ahh so cute and they remind me of Jack anytime we are eating.

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Speaking of Jack. There is no way I could do a favorites post without mentioning this little furball pee monster.

Jack Banner has a new friend, and she happens to be his sister. She was "tickling" Jack. She also shares her nuggets and bosses him around, endlessly. Most of the time he doesn't listen, most of  the time she doesn't either must be why they get along so well.

Little girl pony tails and dresses and a girly girl who loves to twirl and has to carry a purse to match her outfit.



The lake house, the memories it holds and the pleasure of just being there and appreciating the view.

Running. Despite the fact that I complain and sometimes just don't want to I really do enjoy running!!! Especially the races. The first picture is from the March Race, the 2nd is from the DC Cherry Blossom 10miler.

Champagne, and friends, and good times and celebrations or just a night out on the town

Pretty dresses, fun shoes and shiny sparkly outfits



I have so many favorite things that these are just a few! 

nosyness

Is that even a word? Probably not.

I was checking the observer online, clicked on the Carolina Bride story. Have I mentioned that this area is very very very small???

The wedding was the wedding of Mr. Clean's first wife's current boss. So there's a text from Mr. Clean's first wife to the bride. While she works for the bride in the story they are also life long friends, and I truly appreciate lifelong friendships.

So then that sparked my curiosity. Y'all it's no secret that I am ridiculously nosy. I don't hide this. Sometimes I find things I would rather not but for the most part I just have this interest in knowing more.

So I googled the first wife. Long time ago I googled the second one. I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt I would not like the second one if I ever met her in person. Based on stories told, not by Mr. Clean, and just the pictures, I can tell you she and I would not be friends, at all.

Why I hadn't thought to google the first one I don't know. Based on stories told I'm pretty sure I would like her. Then I saw her text to her friend, and it's a text that I would totally send to my friend on her wedding day. Naturally I won't be contacting this person, that would be weird and creepy.

I like the fact that after my quick little research I hold to my opinion that she and I would probably get along like long lost sisters if we ever met by chance in real life. With the way my life works the chances of this happening are not impossible. I never know who will walk through the doors to my restaurant.

bed time, alarms, chill time, Jack and Christmas

I'm hooked on twitter, in a major way!!!! I was on there last night and kept thinking I need to go to bed I need to go to bed and yet I was trying to figure out that one last thing. My intentions were actually to go to bed early, oh well.

This morning when my alarm went off I went back to sleep knowing the second one would go off. Except it didn't. I had 12 minutes to get ready for work this morning. I try to leave at 6. I left at 6:15. I was still here by 7, thank goodness traffic was light. It's just not possible for me to get ready in 12 minutes and take Jack out.

I didn't go to the gym last night. I got home and baked brownies for a work shower. Watched Big Bang Theory re-runs with Mr. Clean, which made me laugh until I cried. That show for whatever reason just makes me laugh, while Mr. Clean is only mildly amused by it. I haven't mentioned to him the fact that my ex boyfriend's (who was a huge nerd) sister introduced me to the show and the characters remind me of the ex and several of his friends.

I'm glad it's Friday. Not sure how work will go tonight or how busy we'll be. If it's nice, I know the patio is going to be packed.

I lost a follower yesterday and it makes me sad. I keep reminding myself that I write for me and I know that over the past weeks my post have been redundant and boring. I know that what I'm writing now I will look back on and use so that's why I'm writing. I need to have this space to vent and reflect and I appreciate followers and love the community and friends I have made!!! I also know I have to be OK with the fact that people move on and I regularly purge my list of blogs that I follow and it's not personal, so I remind myself that the same applies for me.

I talked to Mr. Clean about finding a running stroller. I want to show Girl Clean that exercise outside can be fun. Plus the arm work out would be awesome. The catch is going to be if she will actually even stay put for a mile, I know 3 would be out of the question.

I found a website yesterday on dogs and their behavior and training. The writer went over behaviors but in order to learn what to do she kept linking to Amazon and Cesar Milan books. I realized that I have got to read these books. I love Jack and I want what is best for him and I have been thinking all along he's my baby and I treat him as such except for the fact that dogs do so much better when you speak their language to them and I haven't been doing that. Fortunately he's only 2 (almost 3) so I know that this is totally do-able. Plus according to what I read even older dogs can still be trained it just takes longer.

I was so excited by all that I read I just can't explain!!!!

I mentioned Christmas to Mr. Clean yesterday. We get to sit down and have a talk about how much we're setting aside and what we are going to do. I told him I already bought his present. I'm so excited about it too!!! He's going to LOVE it!!!! I wish that he would let me buy the presents and I would let him do all the decorating because decorating is his thing but I know that he'll want to be a part of buying Girl Clean's presents too.

Dream.....

Busy Bee did a post that was so much fun today I wanted to play along!!! She listed her dream body, vacation, drink, home, job, car and man... So

I found these pics on People.com. I just think she's healthy, and gorgeous!!!! You know that she excercises and watches what she eats. 

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I love the beach!!!! Specifically the memories I have at this beach, Topsail Island NC.

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My favorite drink since I was little has always been milk

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And my favorite adult drink is actually this.


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I love this style house!!!!

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I think I would make an excellent personal shopper!!!

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My dream car





This guy is slowly starting to win his place back as my dream guy. He cooks, he cleans and he makes me laugh often.

The celebrity dream guy.... hmmmm I guess mine is probably Matt

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Link

Kelly's Corner posted this link http://shaungroves.com/2011/09/label-me-this/ and it's so good I'm reposting.

3 consecutive months in a row

I mentioned in a post not that long ago about how I had run into JM in July and hair plug guy in August and that it was still possible to keep that streak going in September. Sure enough last night that streak continued. We were super busy we had large parties all coming in between 6 and 6:30. Plus it was beautiful outside so the patio was hopping.

I had just seated a patio table and I'm walking back in and I say hi to the guest and realize that it's IJ. Now this was a brief blip that took place during the same crazy time period as CK and crazy cokehead so not my favorite time in the history of my story. This guy is the smartest guy I've ever met and considering the intelligence of some of the ones I've dated that is actually quite a statement. (I have a thing for really really smart guys). We smiled and said hi and because we were so busy that was the extent of it. It was nice to have a run in with someone I didn't mind running into.

I asked our event coordinator, who has dated like I have, how it is that none of her ex's ever come in. We agreed that it's because she's smart and always kept the radius of where they lived farther out. Although now the guy she's seeing is local and I always get my favorite answer when I ask how he is, it's a variation of fabulous, fantastic, wonderful, etc. I love when my friends are happy, it's just a delightful thing!!!

I found a few more people last night on Twitter, so I followed. Tonight I hope to have more time to figure out setting up my profile and reading what people tweet. Then I might start to understand how it works. My cousin told me yesterday I need to accept that it's 2011 and get a phone with internet I told her my excuse is that I'm CHEAP.... I know with my next phone I'll have to do this. The catch is I will probably always be looking at my phone once I have internet on it.

Driving in to work this morning it was dark the whole way. That makes it tough but the power nap when I got here helped. I also fell asleep in the car before I had to be at the restaurant. It's cool enough now where I can do this. When it's super hot you bake in the car so it's not possible to fit in the power naps. This particular week is my exhausted week and for whatever reason this week I'm even more exhausted then normal so I'm taking advantage of whatever extra sleep I can get.

I mentioned I had soup for lunch yesterday but Brueggers doesn't have bread bowls. I'm still craving a bread bowl of soup so I'll most likely be enjoying Panera's bread bowl today. I've started reading the Big Stone Gap series, the first one, and I wish I actually had the time to sit down and read it through. I'm catching it in bits and pieces but that's ok, it's funny and sweet and it's making me laugh!!!

Thankful Thursday

I'm thankful for power naps in the car. I arrived in the work parking lot at 6:52 and set my cell alarm for 7:10 I woke up feeling in a MUCH better mood.

I'm thankful for the upcoming weekend.

I'm thankful for a busy night at the restaurant that made it go by quickly.

I'm thankful that not all the guys I dated were awful and the one who was at the restaurant last night was actually one of the super cool ones and I was actually happy to see him. (which means that I have actually run into past guys I've dated 3 consecutive months in a row now)

I'm thankful for fall, and cooler temps and the promise of new beginings

I'm thankful for friends and family

I'm thankful for grace, mercy and unfailing love

internet time soup life moments lottery and power naps

My work internet time is probably going to get me "talked to" if they are checking it.

I was craving soup for lunch today so I checked Panera, Brueggers, and McAllisters soup menus for the day. I chose Brueggers and was completely bummed when I found out they don't have bread bowls. I know they are so bad for you but oh they are so good and I never eat the whole thing.

Yesterday and today I have succesfully reduced my visits to the candy bucket to one time, and no I didn't grab extra to make up for the lack of trips. I did order a big rice krispie treat to go with my bowl of soup that I had for lunch since they didn't have the bread bowl.

Today I've been reminded that life moments be they really difficult or really wonderful both bring tears, tears of hurt and tears of joy and both times were not regarding me personally but rather things going on with friends.

Yesterday I created a list of friends and family for Mr. Clean. He can't keep it all straight and I need him to have something to reference. While creating the lists I was reminded how blessed I am.

I've rediscovered the online puzzles at TLC.com. That is why if my internet is being monitored it will result in being "talked to" among my other constant checking of google reader, cnn and people. Everything we do is web based so I wonder why they would track it anyways. Still I better not press my luck.

I really want to take tomorrow off and sleep the whole day but I feel like that would be a waste of a PTO day, plus I would have had to let my boss know this morning if I was going to do that.

The 10 minute power nap at the end of my lunch was helpful and I'm hoping that I can catch another one before I have to go in to work at the restaurant tonight.

I REALLY DON'T LIKE HOA ASSESSMENTS the &$%()* assessment is for 18 months and I'm already exhausted and I have to do this for the next 16 months *&$%#(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think I'm going to start praying that I win the lottery.... Except I don't think that's realistic so I'll suck it up and go to work.

It's already Wednesday, and that means tomorrow is Thursday and the next day is Friday and then it's payday, whooohoooo!!!! The first day of October is Saturday, how?????

I wouldn't mind winning a shopping spree, I know the lottery isn't realistic but a shopping spree would be fun!!!!

Have a fabulous afternoon!!!!

afternoon drive, evening workout, storms and shopping

Any tips on how to get around the afternoon drive sleepiness? I think this week is tough just because it's my one week out of a month when I feel extra tired and extra emotional, all things are either that much more wonderful or that much more frustrating and my usual tired, is magnified. Yesterday driving home I blasted the AC and turned the radio up and I'm sure I looked pretty fun sitting straight up in my seat... I normally have a little more energy then what I currently have. I know that after this week I will be back to normal.



Dinner last night was a homemade basil garlic chicken pasta that was amazing!!!! It was waiting for me when I walked through the door and smelled amazing!!!! Because it was already ready I was able to eat before the gym. I usually cramp if I try to work out too soon after eating. I got to the gym at 7:45, and I had no energy. I did legs/arms and then the elliptical for a mile. Then I did skater squats lunges and a dumbbell exercises with my arms. By this time it was 8:10 , so despite my longing looks towards the door I dragged myself to the treadmill and forced out a mile. Then I was totally done.

I was home and it was almost time for bed when we had a storm come up. The wind kicked up and I'm not sure if it was just wind or what but it went across our front porch carrying off our chairs and table and everything that was on the table. Goodbye cute orange citronella lanterns. The table was a little plastic porch table, and it was carried all the way down the driveway, craziness!!! So glad that I had parked where I did, the spot where I had parked earlier in the afternoon had part of a tree that fell, this might have caused significant damage to my little car!!!

This morning I needed to stop by the grocery store because I had no bananas. I decided that I wanted to try Greek yogurt. Another thing I've heard a lot about but I just haven't tried. I guess this is a week for new things! I got Dannon, which I tried this morning. To me it tasted like normal yogurt, very smooth and creamy and I liked it. I also purchased Stoneyfield and Chobani, all vanilla flavored. I go through phases with yogurt and cottage cheese where I'll eat it for a week and then not want any for a while. I hear the Greek yogurt leaves you feeling fuller longer and I definitely need that!

It's a bad idea to try and shop early in the morning when you're hungry. I also purchased Almond Milk, it's so ridiculously expensive but OH SO GOOD!!!!! I justified it because it was on sale. I purchased no candy, at all. I contemplated but walked away! I know that if I can curb the sugar cravings for this week then I will have no excuse for all the other weeks!!!

no time but I could not resist the temptation

I keep hearing about this little thing called Twitter... I ignored and ignored and ignored. Namely because most people have internet on their phone and I figure that is how that are able to do this. I've mentioned before I don't "do" technical objects like ipods and race watches. These things intimidate me therefor I ignore them.

However I realized that there was a whole world I was missing out on. Yesterday my coworker/friend told me that I could set it up, wait for it, ON MY LAPTOP.... I was surprised. I don't know why, because obviously it's an online thing and you would be able to do something like this. I have such limited time on my home laptop that I'm not even on FB that often anymore. The new features they just rolled out I know nothing about and I'm going to have to figure out and it will take me a while since I'm not on there 24/7 like I used to be. I think what swayed me was when he told me I could choose certain ones to be sent as text updates to my phone, that sold me!!! I have unlimited texting so the idea of having fun texts throughout the day definitely appealed to me!

I found a few of you that I know through my email contacts or you popped up as someone I might want to follow. Others I looked for because I know you have twitter identities but I had no luck. I was on there right before bed and as it was I stayed up 20 minutes past 10 trying to figure out a few things. I am going to learn, it's just a work in progress.

Tips, tricks and advice are appreciated!!!

This post is boring, a walk down memory lane for me

OK obviously after a summer of being insanely busy I may have a little time on my hands. Which technically I should be using to be productive but today I have been doing various other things...

I just thought about this time last year so I looked to see if I wrote any posts. I did. As I was reading through this week in September last year I know for a fact I would have laughed at anyone who told me where I would be this time this year.

So that leads me to wonder what life is going to look like this time next year.

This time 5 years ago I had my first date with CF&G. He and I met at Sir Edmund Halleys, we had one beer each but sat and talked for hours.

This time 6 years ago I had recently come back from my disastrous Charleston trip where I found my own way home and I was supposed to take time off from dating. I also was preparing to switch restaurants. That time 6 years ago was tumultuous, and exacerbated by meeting crazy coke head psycho the following November and all that went along with that craziness...

I fell into insurance September 2003... How blessed I am that I landed in an industry that I understand and actually enjoy.

I read back on my 10 on Tuesday from last year and laughed. One of the questions was what is your shoe style and my answer was addicted. How true that is!!!

One thing I haven't recorded that I almost wish  I had is my weight. I know that last year according to what I wrote I was feeling hefty. 2009 I was almost at my goal weight. 2008 I was not happy with my weight, and in 2007 CF&G and I had just broken up and I was really unhappy with how much weight I had gained during the course of the 11 months we were together. 2006 I was ok with my weight, then I started dating CF&G... Hmmm I guess I don't need actual numbers, I do remember... 2005 was the summer I dropped to a size 4/6, I was super thin although at the time I didn't see it. 2004 I would have been ok with what I weighed. 2003 I was ending my relationship with the old Swedish guy and had packed on the pounds during that time. 2002 I was at a low weight, I didn't start dating the Swedish guy until December 02. September 2001 I had just graduated from college I was a size 10/12.

I'm still contemplating WW. I talked to Mr. Clean about it last night. I'm just not sure I have the energy, motivation or drive right now despite my constant complaining, I can say that even with my Starbucks Splurge this morning I have kept my fingers out of the candy bucket!!!! Small steps!!!

morning drive in

With my changed hours at work my commute has become delightfully easy. Yes I wake up at 4:45 each morning, but I'm a morning person anyways.

Jack hasn't fully adjusted. It works though, he sleeps in his chair while I'm getting ready. I'm trying to figure out a way to get him a chair in our room so that he gets to sleep in that at night... I just have to find the right one and then make the suggestion...

Today before my exit I realized that I was super sleepy. I'm often super sleepy but today I was remembering the salted caramel mocha I had after my 10K race... It was so delicious and I pass a Starbucks on my way every day. I have not stopped before because I have KCups at my desk for mornings when I really need coffee. However, this morning I wanted a treat and I thought this would be just the thing!

I parked and went inside and as I was looking at the board I realized that they offered this yummy concoction as a frappuccino. What this meant for me is that I could order the big one. I can't drink an entire big hot mocha, it's tasty but I get sick from so much heat and caffeine sloshing in my stomach. However, cold, YES PLEASE!!!! I ordered skim but with whipped cream so I negated the skim credit by ordering the whip cream. It was totally worth it!!!!

I enjoyed my breakfast splurge!!! What is the treat that you sometimes just can't resist?

restaurant conversation time

I never know what to expect on a Monday night at the restaurant. Some Monday nights can actually be busy. Last night was not one of those evenings. It was threatening rain and yet I still had a table that requested to sit outside on the patio. They got SOAKED because the rain blew in sideways.

One of  my biggest pet peeves is when people walk in and tell me that obviously a reservation is unnecessary because there are plenty of open tables. It only bugs me when the tone used is condescending and implies that my restaurant is not impressive enough because we have open tables. Give me a break, it's a Monday night during football season and we have one TV in our bar, who in their right mind would choose us over Taco Mac that is literally 5 steps away and has LOTS of TV's.

I was talking to my friend/the event planner/the one I want to be just like when I'm 50 and we were discussing my frustration/aggravation. As we were talking we discussed me going to talk to someone, which I've been meaning to do but finding the time to do this is difficult. Then we discussed finding the right person because if you don't find someone you click with it's a waste of time and money. We also discussed the staying factor. She asked why. I explained that the reasons I married Mr. Clean still exist. I'm frustrated/aggravated/irritated and still working through my angriness (not a word I know) yet when I put it all on paper I still love him. I see the traits coming back that I saw in the begining. I'm not sure what flip switched after our vows were said but the person I first met seems to be returning.

The other thing she and I talked about is just the time factor. Really the stuff we're learning now is usually covered when you're dating. I made that teenager mistake of thinking "it won't happen to me" regarding everything that could possibly be awful being awful for the first 7 weeks of married life. It's a process, and as much as I have not covered details on here I have been talking and sorting and listening as these weeks have progressed.

I'm more and more often hit with the knowledge that I married someone who is just like my mom. It is my understanding that most girls marry a version of their Dad. If I would have done that I would have married someone just like myself. So it makes sense that I married a version of my mom.
Tonight my plan is to work out. It will most likely be raining so I'll be at the gym. Jack is going to give me the sad face and I'll feel guilty for leaving him but hopefully on Thursday the weather will be nice and we'll be able to go for a run!

I learned

This weekend I learned something new. Most of the mom's probably already figured this out. When a kid is in diapers and suddenly not, their clothes that might have only been a little big suddenly become WAY too big!!!
All the clothes that Mama Clean has bought Girl Clean are going to fit her this time next year... I think that might mean some shopping is in order!!!

It's a process

Honest time. Something I didn't expect to happen. All summer long I have prayed for change and that change happened. I'm talking significant change that in all honesty while I believed and knew that it "could" happen in the back of my mind I didn't believe it "would" happen. I've prayed for lots of things not receiving the answer I was hoping for so this time around I guess I thought that this would be my get out of jail free pass...


I pray for family, friends, situations, opportunities. I pray to say thank you for the blessing that I have. When my personal situation seemed so impossible, so hopeless and so destined for one particular ending, I truly knew that God is a God of miracles. Yet I had never had my own miracle and He did that for other people but not for me. I reached out and asked a lot of people to pray regarding what was happening. I also understood that change doesn't happen overnight. Plus I figured that I would be able to say I did everything I could and it was just time to walk away, when that time came...

I set time limits; if this hasn't changed by this date then I won't stay. If this hasn't improved by this time then this is my plan. In my mind I had started to map out the next chapter, all for just me, because I was already closing out the current chapter. When last Monday night I had a conversation that informed me of significant change and a choice that I never believed would happen I was cautiously hopeful. It's a week in, and the choice is still being made, and suddenly I find myself aggravated and annoyed. Maybe even a little or a lot angry. (Remember in the story of Jonah and the Whale and Ninevah how he got mad when the people repented, I think I might kind of get how he felt...)

In my mind I had it all worked out and tied up. I had a light at the end of a tunnel and I was planning to put on a good face and pretend and then when the time came explain that because this hadn't improved I was leaving. Except now, now I have to continue to face my own responsibilities. I have to actually work and make the effort and not just exist but participate. I tend to be lazy and try and find the easy way and what I face is that this isn't easy and there is no easy way or work around. It's life and it's real and I have to do my part.

I'm thankful for grace, specifically God's grace. He is unfailing, even when we fall short.

Weekend

Friday night we were pleasantly busy at the restaurant. Which meant I didn't leave until after 10, which meant I wasn't home until after 11. So when I had to wake up on Saturday to go run 8 miles I was already in pain. I drove to the gym, stepped on the treadmill and ran 1.5 and it hurt, the whole time. So I got off and went to do weights. I texted Lisa and whined like a 2 year old. I said I just didn't have the energy or even desire to run that many miles and it's just not enough time for me to prepare.

Maybe if I wasn't working quite so much. Maybe if I wasn't trying to fit in quite so much. Maybe even if I had correctly marked the race on my calendar and had actually trained the way I intended I would totally run this. Lisa was so sweet and encouraging and said that sometimes it is best to know when to back off. I've backed off before, I ran a 10K instead of a 1/2 marathon in April 2010. I knew that it wasn't fun and when it quits being fun that it's time to take a step back and regroup. We agreed that part of being grown ups is knowing when to say when. There is a 5K that runs with part of the 15K so I can change my registration and run the 5K instead.

I got a nice workout in, weights and running. Came home and spent the day with my family. We went to Olive Garden and I had my favorite lunch (soup, salad and breadsticks) and then we did a little walking around Concord Mills. This weekend was our first full weekend of big girl panties. I visited the Olive Garden ladies room 5 times, and a couple of the ladies rooms in the mills, however not having accidents is totally worth it!!! We let Girl Clean play in the kid play area. OK, that was just a little unnerving. There were big kids in there and there were a few times when she almost got kicked in the head. I watched and when the situation looked like it was going that way I would walk over and stand next to her. This usually alerted the kid that I was watching and made sure they knew that they needed to watch it! We didn't stay longer then 20 minutes and then we headed on. It was my 2nd Saturday in a row where I was at Concord Mills and bought absolutely nothing for myself but I did have fun!!

Today I drove to Greenville, SC to have lunch with my friend for her birthday. Driving home it was POURING rain!!!! I had a moment on 85 where the car in front of me braked and when I went to break my car was headed directly towards the wall, it was scary!!!! I was thankful I was by myself in the car because I was able to remain calm while I turned the wheel away from the wall unconsciously praying that I would turn in time. I know that I wasn't alone in my car and I did not hit the wall but then the car careened into the other lane. Fortunately cars around me had apparently seen what was happening because there was enough space that I was able to be in the other lane and then corrected back into my own lane. I'm thankful for the fact that my car stayed on the road and did not end up in the wall or hitting another car.

New Beginnings

“We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.” Romans 5:3-4


"Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint." Isaiah 40: 28-31

“The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.” 1 Corinthians 10:13

“So don’t be misled, my dear brothers and sisters. Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession.” James 1:16-18

“See, God has come to save me. I will trust in him and not be afraid. The Lord God is my strength and my song; he has given me victory.” Isaiah 12:2

Today on my calendar it says that autumn begins. It is a new beginning. This summer was in a word, challenging. There were times when I questioned everything I've ever believed. This week has been significant and I am beyond thrilled at what it has brought. I continue to pray trust and believe that the choices made this week continue on.

Here is what I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt God is real, He loves us, He is and was and is to come and He never changes, never fails and is always there.

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." 1 Corinthians 13:13

oops

I was looking at the race calendar. I wrote down my 15K as being on October 15th, it's actually on October 8th. The longest distance I've run is 6.5 miles. If I run 8 miles this Saturday will I be ok to run the 9 miles on the 8th???? Advice please!!!!

Friday Work Driving Running Weekend Clothes and Rain

It's Friday, I blinked it's here.... Last Friday I was all excited for Lisa's visit!!!!! Last night I worked at the restaurant. I rarely switch out and work 2 nights back to back because that is what makes me tired. However a new job and a rare request, I can't really say no since I would wish for the same favor done for me.

Last night was busy, and rainy but some guests still desired to sit on the patio. Fortunately I was out by 9:15, I'm thankful for managers who like me and let me leave earlier then closing. I have been there over a year now, and I'm thankful for the gig it's a fabulous fit for me and for them!

Driving in this morning it was raining. I'm not complaining we need the rain and I leave early enough now that the traffic isn't ridiculous yet.

Mr. Clean has set the TV to come on at 5 so I can listen to the news and weather while I'm getting ready. It's been so long since I've had this small luxury that I'd forgotten how nice it is to have!

Disney princesses on ice is coming to Charlotte and I want to take Girl Clean, and I have to buy her a seat too. It's STUPID expensive for 3 seats for a 12pm Sunday show. Seriously! However I remember I spent even more for another little girl to take her to see Mama Mia and The Lion King in the theatre so I'm pretty sure I'll be purchasing the tickets for this little show for my girl.

The Lion King is in movie theatres in 3D. I didn't see it in theatres the first time, I'm hoping we get to go this weekend. We've talked about it but we'll see if it actually works out. I have to get a 7 mile run done in the morning. I'm pretty sure I'm going to run it on the treadmill. I'm not positive that the rain will be completely cleared out and I want to work on pace. Then next week I can do 8 miles outside since I have figured out the appropriate mile routes for my training for the 15K.

I'm running the 15K solo, which is kind of a bummer. I like having someone there to talk to before the race even if we don't end up running together. I'm sure it will work out. My friend who ran the Charlotte 1/2 is due October 25th and the race is October 15 and I'm guessing that baby girl will probably come a little early so I'll be thinking of my friend during the race!

I'm excited for lunch today. I'm totally picking up the clearance clothes I put on hold yesterday. Before I buy any fall stuff I have to go through what I have and put away the summer stuff. I'm still configuring my closet in my head to figure out the best way to maximize my space.

The sky just opened up, I love the sound of rain on the window!!! Happy Friday!!!!

Lunchtime Shopping

I had the best of intentions to run into the mall to grab a card for my friend who I am having lunch with on Sunday for her birthday. Except I went in through Belks, and I went into the section that is women's clothing...

Earlier this summer when things in my life were pretty awful and miserable I wrote about being at Kohls seeing the shoes and thinking why bother. I'm happy to say that those feelings are completely in the past. I walked into Belk and OH MY WORD THE COLORS, THE FABRICS, THE SALE SIGNS!!!!!!!!!! Tomorrow will kick off the weekend sale that is 50% off the clearance price, so if it's 23.99 that means that it's 50% off of that. I got excited walking through all the beautiful clothes. I had that increased heartbeat and feeling of euphoria that always happens when I see so much fabulous clothing in one place!!!!!

I love a deal, and I had a blast last Saturday shopping with Lisa!!!! Today reminded me of why I must get a grip on the eating, because I LOVE clothes and I like being a certain size and if I keep raking in food I'm not going to fit the clothes that I want to wear.

They seriously have some of the most beautiful clothes I've seen in ages for the fall season!!!! I've walked through some years and been completely disappointed by the selection and options. Go figure now that I could buy out the whole store I have limited space and I have to make sure that everything fits into my closet.

Found here

Found here

Found here

There are literally 100's of dresses right now and they are gorgeous!!!!

days, working out, moderation

This week I switched Wednesday for Thursday with one of my other hostesses at the restaurant. I normally won't switch because I don't like working back to back nights, however every once in a while I will. Tuesday night I went to the gym, and I was still feeling Saturday's run.

I did weights, then a mile on the treadmill. Then I did a mile on the eliptical. I knew I wanted to run on Wednesday so I modified the usual workout for Tuesday. Then last night I was able to take Jack for a run.

Mr. Clean was working late so I fixed dinner and had that waiting for him and I went out for my run. Because it's a rainy week the humidity was high but the temperature alone was fantastic!! Jack Banner enjoyed trying to chase the dog on the other side of the road from us, so much so that he was worn out for the rest of the evening!!

Today is a food day at work. My department hit our service standards and we're celebrating one of my coworkers 40th anniversary with the company. There is SO MUCH food!!! I brought in cinammon rolls, english muffins, and a bean dip. We have donuts, honey bun casserole, bagels, cookies, brownies, and so much more!!!!

Since my birthday in August I have completely given up any kind of healthy eating. Everyone else was joining weight watchers and I was chowing down on all things sugar. Currently my jeans do still fit. I still work out. But I know from past experience that this kind of pattern only leads to posts on how mad I am at myself for allowing myself to gain weight. There is no off switch, I've mentioned before that this is something that needs to change, actually I've mentioned it several times over the past few weeks.

Days like today, where there is so much food readily available, are tough!!! I haven't stepped on the scale in weeks, because to be perfectly honest I don't want to know. I know that my clothes fit, and I know that whatever the scales says I'm going to be depressed. I know to use the scale as a way to monitor the ups and downs and keep a gain from being a really big gain. Except right now I just want to avoid those ugly numbers.

Now more than ever I also know that I need to set an example for Girl Clean when she's with us. I don't know how big of an impact I am because she's with her mom way more then me but I still understand that I do have a responsibility.

Speaking of Girl Clean her mom has been working with her on the potty training. I found Dora and Princess panties for her, and I'm hoping that she masters this process sooner rather then later!!!!

Thankful Thursday

I'm typing this for the 2nd time. For whatever reason blogger did not save my first draft of it. I have to say that I typed the title the first time and stopped thinking to myself no it's only Wednesday then remembered it is in fact Thursday.

I'm thankful for Kohls sales, I got my friend a fabulous birthday present and saved a bunch.

I'm thankful my friend lives in driving distance and I can drive down Sunday to take her to lunch for her birthday.

I'm thankful for last weekend and the fun of running shopping and catching up!!!

I'm thankful for my husband, girl clean and our families!!!

I'm thankful that Jack Banner loves his chair, even if he loves it so much that he now chooses it over his mommy's lap.

I'm thankful for all the fun options that are available to me on my lunch hour.

I'm thankful for new work hours that have made a world of difference in my mornings and afternoons!

I'm thankful that all my jeans still fit and I'm trying to use this as incentive to start doing a better job with my food choices.

I'm thankful for the rain, we needed it here in Charlotte!!

I'm thankful for the break in the rain that gave me the opportunity to run outside last night with Jack!!

I'm thankful for the race watch that my brother and Jelly gave me last year for Christmas and I'm going to force myself to learn how to use it!!!

restaurants and proposals

I talk a lot about my hostessing gigs on here. I was taking a "break" and reading the Charlotte Observer and I came across this story http://www.charlotteobserver.com/2011/09/16/2613776/hometown-love.html. I went back through my archives to see if I had written about this night. I didn't but I remember it vividly.

They got engaged at Nobles and I remember how happy the parents were and how excited they all were. I remember peeking around the corner to see everyone's faces. It was a magical night for the couple. There is something so incredibly unique about working in restaurants where people come to celebrate Life moments. Not too many weeks ago we had a proposal at booth 3. We all knew it was happening and we had the very special opportunity to watch as he got down on one knee and asked her the all important question, "will you marry me?". For some, like me, the moment is shared at a much more ordinary place. Yet it is no less special wherever the question is asked.

What's your proposal story???

Inspiration

The original rules were to give this award to 10 people and link up an inspirational post. Jennifer won the award from Feeling Beachie I pulled this directly from Feeling Beachie's blog; "I usually don’t like to pass awards along, as I feel it is so hard to chose, and I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. But since this award really touched me, I want to share it… I want to share it with some people who the friendship extends past our respective blogs, and continued further into emails, FaceBook or Twitter, whereby giving us the opportunity to share things that we might not want “fully out there.”"

Jennifer at What would Jen Do used the same format for who she selected and she said "I don’t know how you decide who in the blog world will become a real friend to you. All of these ladies down here are people I see, chat with over email or twitter and are even people I have met IRL. I just figure something draws you to each other, even if you can’t explain it."

Both statements are so true. Lisa and I were talking this past weekend about the friendships and how special this community is and how much we appreciate the friendships we have formed. I used to have the ability to comment and more actively participate but my company web recognizer realized that blogspot wasn't "work related" so my participation is now through google reader reducing my commenting ability to when I can log on at home. Here are a few:

Lisa's Yarns

Dude and Sweeties

New Mom in the City

Me and My Boys

What Would Jen Do (yes she gave the award to me but hey it's my award to give now)

Sassy Times
Deep Thoughts by Just Kaye
The Beck Family
Running Chatter
Love Everyday Life
Knowing the Difference
Wolfs on Safari

Even though the rules say link to one inspirational post I linked to the blogs, I wouldn't follow if I didn't like reading!

Jack's Chair

I know the pictures are a little dark and for that I apologize but this is a very big deal!!!!!! I arrived home from work last night and I notice Jack's blanket draped on one of our chairs. Mr. Clean told me that he realized that Jack didn't have his own chair and so he had put the blanket in the chair and put toys up there and told Jack that was his chair. Jack, being Jack, wanted nothing to do with his chair. However this morning I put his pillow along with the blanket on his chair and JB was a very happy camper!!!!

work, visits, church, lazy day

The much anticipated weekend flew by just like I knew it would. Friday night I had to work at the restaurant. Lisa texted me to let me know she would be going out for a little while to catch up with a friend so I felt a lot better knowing she wouldn't be sitting waiting for a super long time in the lounge. I forgot my work shoes for the restaurant and my lunch on Friday morning in my rush to get out the door. Mr. Clean drove the hour down to drop off my shoes at the restaurant and they were waiting for me when I got there.

Friday night was a good busy. I almost ran out of tables at 8pm. In the area of Charlotte where my restaurant is located everyone wants to eat at 7 which means that when people want a booth at 8 and I've seated all my tables they are going to have to wait for about another hour. Such is life it's why you make reservations and why when you call at 5 on Friday asking about availability I tell you that my next available reservation is 8:45. Lisa arrived and I was super excited to see her!!! Fortunately I was able to leave at around 8:45 so she was able to enjoy some yummy food and catch up on her email at a table that had a perfect view of all the goings on of a Friday evening!!

We arrived at my parents house and I introduced Jack to Lisa. Fortunately she was prepared and he warmed up quickly so that worked out well!! We were up early early on Saturday morning to pick up NH and we arrived at the race location a little before 7am. I thought the race started at 7:30 but it didn't start until 7:45. Fortunately there were places inside where we could wait since it was unusually chilly on Saturday morning. I kept praying for the rain to hold off until after the race and I'm so thankful that it did!!!

I love running with Lisa, we ran the first part of the Cherry Blossom 10miler together and then this race we ran most of together. I kept telling her if she needed to go on to go but she kept saying she was happy to stay with me, for which I am thankful!!! She kept me paced, which is nice to have!!! Mile 4 was a very mean hill and at the end it was a slight hill but just enough that it hurt me and made me want to cry, but I couldn't because I was forcing my legs to continue to turn over. I so badly wanted to push harder but I just didn't have it in my lungs or legs there at the very end. That frustrates me no end and I plan to work on it for my 15K in October.

Lisa rocked it out as did my friend NH. NH ran her first 10K in under an hour which to me is a huge accomplishment. We dropped NH off and then returned to my parents to shower and get ready. Mr. Clean and Girl Clean were invited to lunch at Cabo but they couldn't make it so we had a very fun girls lunch, Lisa, NH and I!!! I enjoyed the BBQ Mahi and Swordfish special fish tacos and the El Cheapo margarita, I celebrated!!!

After lunch we said goodbye to NH and went SHOPPING!!! I LOVE to shop whether it's for me or helping someone else. We found some wonderful pieces for Lisa's fall work wardrobe and I ate my way through Concord mills. Gelato, yes please, cookies of course!!!! Hmm sugar addiction still in full force, maybe at some point I will buckle down regarding this little issue of mine. We finished up shopping and grabbed a quick bite to eat before church then I swung by my house so Lisa could see where we live.

Church was FREEZING cold. I don't think they had turned off the AC yet and I'm so glad Lisa purchased a jacket earlier in the day that she could use to help keep her warmish in church!! I yawned all the way through church not from boredom but from exhaustion!!! Mr. Clean told me that at one point on Saturday Girl Clean looked at him and told him that L needed to come home now. I think she missed me. The Barbie doll was a big hit. Mr. Clean let her have one and she played with  her quite a bit!! After church and a quick trip to the grocery store we headed back to my parents.

Sunday was low key. I dropped Lisa off at the airport and headed home. We ran errands and then for dinner Mr. Clean made quite the yummy meal!!! Filet, mashed potatoes and asparagus with a balsamic glaze. It was awesome!!! We watched football and just caught up with each other.

I'm the worlds worst about pictures so I have none. I'm sad about this since it was such a wonderful time!!! I hope that everyone has a fabulous Monday!!!

From January to September in Pictures

Vegas Trip January 2011

February 2011 I met Girl Clean for the first time, we went to breakfast and then the kid's museum

March 2011 I ran the Corporate Cup 5K with my friend NH

I got engaged!!!

In April I visited my friend Jess in DC and got to meet Lisa and Becky. It was fabulous!!!

After the Easter Egg Hunt

Wedding gown shopping

In May I studied for my CIC test while Jack Banner kept me company

Clearly he was less then excited by writing thank you notes with me!

June 11 I got married

In July I had an awesome 4 mile race!!!

August hanging out on the front porch

Walking our way into September

weekend, food, plans

It's FRIDAY!!!!!!! Tomorrow is the Hit the Brixx 10K, yesterday at lunch I picked up packets. Then I wandered through Trader Joes which is conveniently located in the same strip of shops.

I arrived home yesterday afternoon and packed Jack's stuff then I put my clothes in a suitcase. I actually pulled out fall/winter clothes since I know it's going to be cooler this weekend. I'm already trying to figure out a way to make sure that I am able to keep these clothes and find a place for them all. My closet isn't long but it's very deep...

After catching up with Mr. Clean I headed to my parents. I got Jack set up and cleaned the bathroom and said goodbye. Mr. Clean made Shrimp Pad Thai, it was fabulous!!! This morning I was running late and forgot my lunch portion of it, so sad!

Have I mentioned that it's FRIDAY!!!!! I'm so excited for this weekend!!!! Lisa is already in town and will be heading over to the restaurant once she finishes up with work today. Then she is going to hang out in the lounge area until my shift is over. I do feel like a bad hostess for my friend but I also know that people watching on a Friday night is actually quite entertaining and I'm hoping that I will be done fairly early so it shouldn't be too bad.

I was talking to my college roomie on the way to my parents yesterday, we were finally able to set up a time to get together, October 16. Fortunately she understands the craziness that is my schedule. Every weekend between now and then is booked. During the week I work 3 nights and have to make sure to run the other 2 so that just leaves the weekends, no wonder time goes by so fast!!!

Happy Friday all!!!!

small world, filters, dates, and blessings

Last night I was twice reminded of how small Charlotte is yet again. The first time was actually an almost because a couple walked in the door and the guy was a twin of KS. He looked so much like him that until he got right in front of me I thought it was him. Because of how our relationship ended I can only imagine running into each other would either be super awkward or we would just pretend we don't know each other.

It was nearing time for me to leave and a couple walked in the door with a baby. I looked and recognized the guy as one of the guys I worked with at Oneo. This was until Nobles my very favorite restaurant that I had worked at. Both are now closed. B and his wife came in and I seated them at one of my favorite tables and he asked me if one of our chef's was in the kitchen. I figured they knew each other from restaurants; turns out he's the chef's younger brother. In this town you don't talk bad about anybody because somehow or someway they know someone you know!!!!!

Seeing KS's twin last night would have made for the 3rd ex sighting in as many months. July I saw JM, August I saw hair plug guy/BG and then last night would have been the other but the month is young and it's possible it could happen again for September. The new hostess and I had the whole conversation about how small this world is, she is originally from Charlotte too.

Working as a hostess, for the most part, I usually click very quickly with my co-hostesses. There have been instances where I've had to work with individuals who rubbed me the wrong way or were unpleasant but I've been extremely fortunate to have worked with delightful people!! Last night I learned all about K, where she went to high school, college, Grad school. We talked about Charlotte and the crazy growth. I shared a few of my stories. A few of the moments from Vegas and why I had to break up with Joe. The story of hair plug guy and FB and me figuring out he had a girlfriend. The very quick version of JM. I've realized that when you're real with people they are real back and that's why I ask for their story and share parts of mine.

Over the years I've learned to filter some but truly with me what you see is what you get. It's probably why I was so not good at dating. I don't withhold information and when you ask me questions I answer. I like knowing other people's stories. This would probably be why I love reading blogs so much. I like pictures and stories and getting to know someone and then sometimes having the most fabulous opportunity to actually meet in person!!!

As October 20 draws closer my thoughts are more and more drawn to that date from last year. I just went back and read posts from that time. I've been sorting it in my head. Charlotte is small, so even though JM and I had no official mutual friends he knows friends of the event coordinator at my current restaurant. Not only that but he has golfed with her boyfriend. So I've learned that he's something of a player. He doesn't like to be tied to anyone. He is married to his job and likes being able to use that as an excuse to keep it light. I understand that I have to let this one go. After I saw him the what if's exploding in my head and the ideas of how it might have been were frequently running on the story reel that plays in my mind. I had to realize that he was the one who ditched me. He was the one who was all flash and then gone just as quickly. He wasn't going to contact me, he wasn't going to come back and say I screwed up and I've realized it. All the fantastical scenes I wanted to create for my day dreams were going to do my absolutely no good at all.

The reality of what my life was around that time this past July was overwhelming and escaping into those what if thoughts was not going to benefit me. I started talking, and started understanding what I needed to do. I knew that there would be no immediate fixes but I needed to see changes. I needed to have indicators that it would improve. LOTS of prayers LOTS and LOTS of support and encouragement and love have been provided. I have realized the need to be more filtered on here and I am, yet I want to write about the positive. I'm so blessed to have girlfriends who listen and encourage and provide different perspectives. I knew that change wouldn't happen over night.

Earlier this week I was talking to Dr. MG about this blog and what I've documented over the past 4 years. I was talking about how much I appreciate being able to look back and remember what all has happened. She made a comment that has stayed with me all week. "I know this has been a really tough few months for you, and again you have grown so much stronger through this all. The L of even just a couple years ago would not have fared as well. I am so proud of you, and I am confident that everything will turn out for the best- whatever the outcome."

I could play the what if game all day long on a variety of decisions that I've made, it won't change a thing. I can play the what if game for what will happen in the future, it's not going to be a productive use of my time. I'm so incredibly blessed, and remembering that, benefits me greatly!!!

Thankful Thursday

I'm thankful that I have a set schedule of Monday/Wednesday/Friday at the restaurant. This means that I spend no extra money on gas but I make the extra I need to supplement the full time.

I'm thankful for the K0hls coupons from yesterday and having the opportunity to pick up a few fun things!!

I'm thankful that I was able to have significant and productive conversations, plus some fun ones, with Mr. Clean this week.

I'm thankful for my parents, and the fact that they are letting me and my friend crash at their house along with the dog this weekend.

I'm thankful for Mom and Dad Clean and how supportive they are.

I'm thankful that I got ALL my thank you notes done!!! Writing the notes reminded me of how blessed we were/are by the generosity of family and friends.

I'm thankful that Jess posted pictures of the babies even though she doesn't like camera phone pictures those pictures made me smile this morning!!!

I'm thankful that tomorrow is Friday and this week has been super productive and minimally stressful!!!

I'm thankful that we will have cooler temperatures for the weekend although I have to admit that I'm a little sad to see summer go!

I'm thankful for the new hostess who I trained last night, she is all kinds of fabulous and I really enjoyed talking to her, it made the night fly by!!!

I'm thankful that my manager usually let's me go home around 9 on Monday and Wednesday nights!!!

I'm thankful for my friendships!!

I'm thankful for Harris Teeter which is open 24 hours at Stonecrest and I can run in to grab water and bananas at 6:45am

I'm thankful for the Natalie Grant CD Relentless that I bought 2 years ago and listening to it this week has been wonderful!!!

I'm thankful that God provides encouragement in so many ways and in so many places and I know that He is good all the time. The circumstances in life are not always good or always fair but God is always Good and He never changes!