Professional Pictures

I hope everyone had a fabulous weekend!! I had an email from my Dad yesterday morning that had this link http://lightideas.zenfolio.com/loriwedding


When all the plans first began I wasn't even going to have a professional photographer. My brother has a fancy camera and lenses, I have a few friends who love taking pictures. So I didn't really feel a need for a professional. Unless I had planned a different time for my wedding and my friend Jess hadn't JUST had Maddie, then I would totally have had a professional photographer. I would have made up for having her work at my wedding somehow, I LOVE her pictures!!!!

During conversation my parents pointed out that my Dad had done some editing work with a guy who is a photographer and Nick does wedding photography. They asked if we (I) would like for Dad to talk to Nick about taking pictures that day. I said I didn't care. My Dad talked to Nick and he agreed to come photograph the day in exchange for the work my Dad had done. It worked out very well!! I had no idea what to expect and I was super excited with how the pictures turned out.

I love pictures, and I ALWAYS forget to take them. So having friends with cameras and a professional photographer helped capture moments of memories and for this I'm thankful!!!

I thought it was overload but it's overlord

The fabulous Jennifer has awarded me the overlord award, I thought I saw overload and my immediate response was, I can TOTALLY relate, then I caught that it's overlord

To play, I must change three things, any three things I want, so I’m going with….

1. I’d like independent wealth so that if I work it’s only for fun not because I need the money. - This is actually Jen's but it's so good and I agree with it so I'm stealing it.

2. I’d like to be able to eat whatever I want without having to think about the repurcussion that none of my clothes will fit because of not watching what I eat.
3. I would have a house that had HUGE closets and plenty of storage and a pool in the backyard and cable tv.

I get to pass this along to Hailey, Heather, Mandy, Miranda, Sassytimes and Krystina, also if you want to play along, please play!!!

Jean Love

All jeans found at Piperlime.com. I think that if/when I lose down a few more pounds I will reward myself with a new pair of jeans. The catch to ordering online is you have to make sure the company has a decent return policy. Piperlime has FREE SHIPPING AND RETURNS!!!! This is AWESOME!!!! I've ordered a few things and they worked so I did not have to send them back but I appreciated knowing that if I needed to return them it would not cost me an arm and a leg!!!



Adjustment

Adjustment… I think this is the word that best describes life right now. Waking up at 5 to leave the house by 6:30 making sure Jack gets time outside the crate before he has to go in the crate again. He has a sleep crate, which is the crate I brought him home in. Then during the day he has a bigger crate that is a souvenir from one of the exes from last year.

I realized last night how many shoes I let go of, and I almost cried. Shallow, maybe, but it's true. My clothes all fit, I couldn't begin to guess how much clothing I've either sold, given away, or donated. I was looking at what's left and again I almost cried. I get that I should not begrudge, I get that I’m blessed, but today I'm feeling sorry for myself.

My commute to work is now an hour. I love my job so I will deal with this. It's just an adjustment time. This morning I had a note on the mirror that said I love you. That helps. I'm definitely overly tired, I have to adjust to my new time schedule.

I have to change my license, my insurance agents license, this list goes on and on and I'm not sure how to do it all and I don't have time during the day before stuff closes, lovely.

I sound ungrateful and more then anything I'm just venting. I know that it will all work out, I know that eventually I'll get used to my new normal. Maybe someday I won't be quite so upset that I lost my clothes and shoes collection. I think I will use this as my excuse to start buying really really good jeans!!!

I tried to run last night but I was exhausted and I forgot my phone. I don't like to run without my phone so I ended up just taking Jack for a walk. We'll run tonight. I had better, if I want my clothes to fit.

Have a fabulous Thursday!!!! Tomorrow is FRIDAY!!!!!

New Neighborhood

Last Tuesday I went for my first run on one of my new streets where I can run.  Thursday night I went to the new gym, and I don't love it but it will serve it's purpose. Saturday morning I had figured out a 4 mile out and back on the same road I ran Tuesday night.

Saturday mornings run did not happen. Girl Clean was up a few times throughout the night and to accomplish Saturday's run I would have had to have been out the door by 6am. That just didn't happen. Instead I chose to run Sunday morning. I was able to sleep until 7 and I took Jack and we completed the 4 mile run.

I've signed up for a 4miler race on July 16th. Because it's starting to get hot my main focus is just making sure I still get out and run or go to the gym. Last summer I was able to stay focused on my fitness but I was also training for the ATL half marathon. This year I don't have an actual preset schedule and I'm really just winging it as I go.

Lunch time

Because our department is having a picnic Friday, we've been allowed to make up an hour this week in order to leave early on Friday, this ROCKS!!!!

Because I have to make up an hour I took a 30 minute lunch and made a quick trip to the grocery store that also has a BOA atm. I picked up a sandwich and the bag of kid fun candy that includes tootsie candy made it into my bag.

I do not need tootsie candy but for whatever reason I have been craving them for weeks now. Usually what happens is I buy the bag, eat about 10 of them, realize I have no self control and promptly march them over to my underwriter's desk. My underwriter has the candy bucket. I buy candy and give it to her and this way I have to think about it and stand up and walk a ways to get to her desk.

Right now I've hit the 10 pieces and it's time to take a little trip...

An old wooden wardrobe can not withstand a lot of clothes

Part of the "conversations" regarding clothes this week are a result of the fact that I broke the pole holding my clothes in our wooden wardrobe.

We have an old matching wooden chest of drawers and wardrobe. The house was built in 1900 so our closet is this tall part of the wall that has 2 drawers at the bottom and 2 shelves above and then the closet part. I had a closet that took up almost an entire wall of my room and I had a chest of drawers, a vanity, a BIG set of the sterilite drawers, and 2 smaller sets of sterilite drawers. My clothes pretty much took up every part of my room. Mr. Clean is not going to let me do this in our room.

He fixed the pole that holds the clothes on Tuesday and then moved all his clothes over to the wardrobe and put my long hanging dresses in that. Then he moved all my clothes over to the sturdier closet. I went through and pulled out all my brown/red and pink pants and took it down to just black. I kept my multi color tops but I have sorted through those to get everything to fit on the hanging rack. My next plan is to take one of the small sets of sterlite drawers and put this in the closet. The shelf that is above I can put shoes and I can put shoes on top of the sterlite drawers. He gave me 3 out of the 4 drawers in the chest of drawers. Slowly but surely it is starting to look like I'm making progress. I still have to go through my shoes. There might be tears but I will do my best to put on the big girl panties and suck it up.

For dinner last night he made tuna tartar, it was AMAZING!!!! He's such a good cook if I don't watch it this will be a non issue because none of my clothes will fit anyways! I did got to the gym after dinner, my first time at this location. I figured out it's 10 minutes to get there. I figured out that it's busy so I won't want to go before 7:30. I like the equipment but it's definitely tightly squeezed into the space. I had a great workout, arms, legs and I ran 3 miles!

Clothes, Shoes, working out my thoughts long boring feel free to skip

I know that I've mentioned this a few times, my clothes and shoes.

I grew up and wore a uniform until I was in the 8th grade. That meant that I really didn't need a whole lot of clothing. By the time I was in the 7th grade I was in a size 16/18 if I remember correctly. This meant that even the clothes I had I did not love.

Before I started high school my mom took me to TJ Maxx and we bought 3 pairs of jeans, a black pair and 2 blue pair, all Gloria Vanderbilt. I had a green skirt and 1 or 2 dresses. This was all the clothing I had. My aunt and my grandmother would give me clothes when they would clean out their closets and they had good taste and wore a lot of button downs and sweaters so I wasn't wearing rags, and I was still a 14/16 so I didn't have whatever the latest fashion was. Although in 1993-1997 the fashion leaned towards the "grunge" look and that wasn't and never will be my look.

When I determined I would run for a national office with Children of the American Revolution I knew that looks played a part and I had to lose weight to stand a chance at winning the office. I worked hard after returning home from the few regionals that I attended right before my senior year of high school. By the time I graduated from high school I was a size 12. I didn't win the national office I ran for but I did accept a national chairmanship which meant I would be on regional tour for the summer.

That summer I probably dropped to a size 10. When you are travelling and going and you have enough will power not to eat then the weight will come off. By the end of that summer I was ready to take on college. I thought having an 8am PE class 3 mornings a week would be help me lose more weight. Unfortunately I didn't lose I actually gained. When I went home for winter break I was back up to a 14/16.

My next door neighbor in the dorm had a fashion sense that was amazing. She was majorly into the club scene and had an older sister so even though she was only 18 she looked and acted years older. I loved her, she was wild and fun and gorgeous and she had the most incredible clothes. She left town most weekends and it was from her closet that I found out about the magic of black pants. She had a pair of express black pants that were fantastic. Because I was shaped the way I was I actually stretched them and she ended up giving them to me. Hind sight I should have offered to pay for them but since she was also the one who threw away underwear so she didn't have to do laundry and just bought more it didn't occur to me to make this offer at the time.

College was a place where the main staple was jeans and sweaters. Black pants came out on Friday and Saturday nights sometimes but a lot of times it was just jeans with a cute top. My sophomore year I went through sorority rush, and it was the same time that I realized I could lose weight if I could suppress my appetite and on top of that I needed help staying awake… By the end of my sophomore year I was a size 10. I pretty much stayed a size 10 with some fluctuation up to a 12 for the rest of college.

After college, I had a membership to the Y through my parents. I ran into bad news boy formerly know on this blog as RS. My breakfast and lunch consisted of hot tamales. Some days I had soup. By August, a year after graduating from college, I was down to a small 8. Bad news boy got married and I met the old Swedish guy and started eating. I was back in a 10 and during this time working in a high end bridal salon which meant I felt incredibly frumpy and ugly as I worked with brides to be who were so thin and fit and toned.

The bridal salon didn't work out as a full time gig, although this is the same place where I've gone back and helped out on the floor many times over throughout the past few years. It was working in retail where I learned about mirrors and that you can't deny what the mirror shows.

September 2003 I left the bridal salon for the insurance carrier and shortly after picked up another part time job, this time in a restaurant as a server. That server gig didn't work out but the hostess gig at the new restaurant stuck. During this time there was an ingredient allowed in weight loss drugs that actually made weight loss drugs effective. I popped those like candy.

Then the government made that ingredient illegal and this was when a coworker told me about an online pharmacy that sold prescription diet pills, you just had to go in and fill out your information, putting in the information that showed that you were higher then a certain BMI, you gave them money, they fedex-ed you your diet pills. May 2005 I was finishing up the hostess gig at the restaurant where I had been, training for my new better paying hostess gig and closing on my condo. I was a size 6 sometimes 4. I moved into my condo and I had a crazy amount of clothing and shoes. I weeded out all the 14's, 12's and 10's that were in my closet. I purchased clothes and more clothes and more shoes. I had the restaurant job, the full time job and I was about to have a roommate, it never occurred to me that the credit would dry up and I would someday wish that I hadn't been quite so frivolous with my money.

September 2006 CF&G, already a free spender I took it upon myself to buy for these two. I wanted them to have, I wanted to contribute. I wanted to fix things. I had let my restaurant job go in February 2006 because I was struggling with voice loss. I tried to go back in June but it was not possible. In September I started working in the Hallmark store to help but what I failed to do is actually make headway, I just spent my paychecks at the store.

After the breakup with CF&G reality came crashing hard. My free spending ways caught up with me and ran over me like a freight train. I suddenly realized that I owed, I owed, I owed and I was not in a good place. Then came a letter from the mortgage company that the escrowed my taxes wrong and I owed money or I could bump up my additional monthly mortgage payment. So I started having to pay more on the mortgage each month, I had no roommate and I was not in a good place. I had a job that was the most miserable, horrible, suffocating experience and life was not going the way I thought it would.

I turned 30, I broke up with the bad news boy, this was for the whatever go round that was. He and I reconnected and I made the dumb decision to give him another chance. This time around I agreed to move to where he was because he no longer lived in Charlotte and I went thru clothes and shoes and house stuff and donated and eliminated.

When he broke up with me, I realized that I had just cleared out a whole lot of space for more clothes so I gradually added back to my clothing and shoe collection.

This is bringing us up to last spring when I was in the relationship and trying so hard to make it work. In looking back I know I should have broken up with him before I did but I also know I learned a lot about myself and even more after and my biggest clue that I was unhappy should have been the amount of weight I put on and the fact that none of my clothes fit me. I despise that feeling of everything being tight and nothing looking right.

The question keeps coming up why do you think you need all these clothes and shoes? In my head it's not that much, especially because I've already gone through so much. I know people who have more clothes then me and I know those who have less.

As I've written I've been trying to figure all this out. I just read a post by one of my friend's and it hit me that even though I would cry I would totally give away everything if it meant fixing something for someone else. Perhaps this is why I'm struggling less and less as I've typed, and why I'm writing in the first place. I determined this morning I would take everything to the battered women's shelter and that made me want to go through more, and more quickly. Not going to lie, it's still not easy.

I figured out the best way to handle the situation is to eliminate all the pants and skirts I could not wear at the restaurant. Since I'm going to be working 3 nights a week I decided that this is where the priority of clothes will be. Then I'm keeping my jeans because on the weekends I know I'll either be in sundresses or jeans. I kept colorful tops but I'll be going through the tops again to see what I can further eliminate. I know that there are shoes I can now let go of because of the pants and skirts that are going. There is still more and I'm going to do my best to not feel resentful about the situation.

I guess the bright note is this is excellent motivation not to gain weight!!

Pictures 06-11-11

My friend Dr. MG was taking pictures on her Ipad while I was getting ready. My college roommate came to help me lace up my dress. Once she helped me lace up my dress she sat down with her glass of champagne.

My beautiful SIL Jelly was there to help do whatever my Mom asked for. She escaped for a few moments to enjoy some champagne!

Instead of waiting to do our pictures at the end I asked that we be able to do a first look. This is where you have the groom waiting in the chapel (or wherever) and then the photographer gets a shot of his face as the bride comes down. Mr. Clean and I had to leave in time to pick up our key for where we were staying, so I made sure to get as much done as possible before the ceremony and reception. Dr. MG got this shot as I was preparing to go downstairs and I LOVE this picture, it catches my feeling of anticipation that I was feeling right then.

My mom wanted the parents to be in for the first look. This defeats the whole purpose of what is supposed to be a moment for just the bride and groom. I said whatever, at this point I was so done with it all and just ready to leave for the honeymoon but fortunately enough other people were there and they apparently told my Mom no because it was just he and I for a minute as far as I know. Once I saw him everything else around us disappeared.

This is my first glimpse of him. I walked down in the same chapel where I spent so many Friday morning chapels and had my 8th grade graduation ceremony. I have so many memories of this wonderful chapel and I would not trade having my ceremony here for anything!

After the first look we went to look at cakes. While down there I got to see the special surprise that Mr. Clean had for me. His mom had asked me for another picture of my dress and I thought it odd but sent it. He had sent a picture of his suit along with my picture to a lady who hand paints wine glasses. She painted wine glasses that had a bride and groom that looked a lot like us and then our date, they are SO cool!!! After this I went upstairs where they were trying to get me to eat something. I just wanted to cool off and talk to my friends. 

As I have more pictures I promise to share them. I also have pictures from my work shower that I definitely want to put up but I know that I always like to see pics from weddings and it's fun to look back.

Wedding Recap

Friday night I went to bed and I kind of slept but not really. Saturday morning I was fully awake right before 6 so I got up to run. I took Jack with me and we did a great run and then I gave him a bath since he starts to smell like a puppy dog when he goes running and it's hot.

I started getting ready only to realize I needed to write out my vows. My parents wanted to take one car and wanted to be at the church at 10 so I just threw my stuff in bags and finished my hair and makeup at the church. I should have probably practiced my hair at least once or not promised to wear it down. I always do my hair up, especially when it's hot.

My college roommate who I worked with at the bridal store came to help me get into my dress. She had me all laced up and I had requested that Mr. Clean and I be able to have a first look since I requested to have all pictures taken before the wedding. I was ready and had to wait forever while the photographer got pictures of Mr. Clean, finally we were able to see each other and then we started taking the group shots. Girl Clean was sick and really just wanted to be held. I'm really blessed that her mom was there to get her ready and hung out while everything was going on.

Once pictures were finished Mr. Clean and I walked down to see our cakes. The cake we cut was made for me by a family I used to babysit for. The mom is a caterer and when she found out when the wedding was she contacted my mom and said she wanted this to be their gift to us. For the cakes served we had sheet cakes that were also gifted to us by an incredibly sweet lady who used to make all cakes for wedding at our church. They are seriously the most amazing cakes ever and I LOVE them!!!! She has retired and no longer makes cakes but every once in a while you can convince her to make a cake for a special occasion.
After we looked at the cakes I wanted to hang out with Mr. Clean and everyone but instead I went upstairs for more pictures. The tension of my mom was palpable. She wanted everything to be perfect, her version of perfect, and if anything veered from what she had in her head then it was wrong. We didn't do a rehearsal and therefore everything that wasn't just so was faulted on not having a rehearsal.

Finally it was time for everything to start. I heard the music, my mom stood and Dad and I started down. We arrived at the front and went through the words of introduction and I kissed Mr. Clean at some point because that's just what we do. I didn't even realize until after the fact that we were supposed to hold off on it. The words were said and it came time to say our vows to each other. Mr. Clean went first and totally surprised me. I didn't expect much more then I will love you and I got so much more then that. While he was saying his vows to me I had to completely shut my mind off to the fact that I didn't have my vows. I gave them to the family friend my Mom had asked to direct the wedding to give to Pastor Tery and she did but then he didn't know what it was, because I wrote them on the back side of a piece of paper, and gave them to his wife. So once Mr. Clean finished his part Pastor Tery's wife had to come up to hand me mine. It was a moment that makes us laugh, I read mine to him and then we lit the unity candle and then we were done.

All day people were trying to make me eat, and I wasn't hungry and I was so hot! I was glad that we dismissed everyone row by row because that way I actually got to hug each person and remember who was there. We had to have a few more pictures taken after the ceremony and then we went down to cut the cake. After we cut the cake we had a quick toast and then I escaped upstairs to change. My mom had given instructions to pack a cooler so we actually did have food for the drive which was nice.

We exited through a cloud of bubbles and drove away.

Hailey posted wonderful pictures!! I was so happy to see her and so excited Noah joined us!! I don't have pictures, I've received some and I need to look at them again and get them posted but currently the house is a disaster and getting everything organized is a top priority. My other top priority is thank you notes!

I hope everyone had a fabulous weekend!!!

June 10

It's hard to believe that tomorrow is the day I marry Mr. Clean. I woke up this morning and my Mom and I went to the Farmers Market for my flowers. The flowers are beyond gorgeous!!!! Purples and oranges and whites and all just beyond description, pictures don't do them justice pretty!!!!

From the farmers market to the church where friends came and helped set everything up. I understand that tomorrow I will be grateful that I grudgingly complied regarding my wedding. When it's all said and done I will have had a beautiful day filled with family, friends, laughter and love and what more could anyone ask for as they start their married life with their best friend.

Once everything was set up at the church we grabbed a quick bite to eat and then went for pedicures. My nail girl was too cute and my Mom treated my matron of honor and her mom (who both helped today) and her little sister (who is keeping nursery tomorrow) to pedicures. I think that our conversation kept our nail friends entertained because we were all over the place on conversation topics. My Godmother and Godsister arrived in town from Pittsburgh and came and joined us.

After toes we said goodbye to my MOH and her mom and sister and then we went to grab dinner. BBQ was the meal for the evening and it was YUMMY!!!! My Godfamily, Mr. Clean and my Mom's sister all enjoyed dinner at my parents house. It was a perfectly relaxed, fun evening that was not stressful but just a blessing.

My dress for the reception is pressed. I have to pack for my honeymoon. My fingers and toes look pretty. Mr. Clean has texted me good night and that he loves me.

Life is truly what happens when you are trying to make plans. I have been thinking about the timing of everything over the past few days. I spent the summer learning me. I learned this past fall that I could still fall hard and fast for someone. I learned that I would rather be single and happily so then tied to someone who was not right for me and embarrassed me. I understood why the guy from the fall didn't work out, it's not possible for a guy to be married to his job and married to a woman, or at least I'm not willing to put myself in this position. Just when I accepted that I liked where I was and how my life was I met Mr. Clean.

I love him. I understand that we are human, that we will mistakes. I know that everyday is not going to be perfect and we're going to have moments where it won't be fabulous. I know that life will have wonderful highs and hard lows. I know that as long as we put God first, then everything else will just work.

I am blessed.

Working out

My friend/coworker Miss V commented yesterday about how often I've been running. Truth, I actually am working out the same amount but I'm actually having to plan it a little more then normal. At my condo I could walk out the door and run. At my parents I can run but I have to run up and back and up and back in order to have a decent run. It's a 1.1ish mile stretch. I did this Sunday morning with Jack Banner. I don't like up and back repeats or loop running because it makes me antsy. I like to have a route that does not repeat itself but you do what you have to do. I also have the gym that's close enough by that I can go and this has increased my strength training.

The funny thing is with all the lifting and moving I've done my arms are actually very toned. So it's fun to look at my arms when I'm doing my weight reps and see the muscles. I just wish my legs could look half as good as my arms. This is what happens when you have an apple shape. If I go by my clothes I'm actually a normal size, however when I look at my legs they look ridiculously fat to me. It's in my head, I get it, doesn't change that they are fat.

Moving on. Last night I had a great workout. I did 2 miles running, then leg weights, then another mile then arms and then I called it a night. I plan for a Thursday afternnon gym workout, followed by dinner with 2 of my girlfriends. I have cancelled most plans I've had with anyone since moving to my parents and this night is MINE to spend with my college roomie and my friend NH. It won't be a late night. The following morning I have to be up early to go to the farmers market then I have to help set things up. I didn't want to have to help set things up but since it's "my" wedding it means I'm obligated, whether I wanted it or not.

I feel bad, my mom wants this to be special and she loves me and I get it. Last night she says I look at her like she's public enemy number 1. If I said that this wedding is what you want it would just hurt her feelings more so I keep my mouth shut and say thank you for all you're doing. She says she's not stressed because she has good friends and they all want to be involved in this day. I swear I'm not ungrateful, it's just NOT AT ALL WHAT I WANTED or have ever wanted. She chooses to forget that even in high school I swore up and down I would go to the courthouse if I ever got married. Yes I worked in bridal, yes I've had a blast helping my friends with their weddings and enjoying their weddings and I love all things wedding related, I have just NEVER EVER NEEDED THIS FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!

I'm thankful, I truly am. I'm blessed. I'm aware that this too shall pass and when it does I will be married and my life will have a new normal.

Matthew West - "Wouldn't Change a Thing"

When my mom asked our friend to do the music she said she had the perfect song. She played this for me last night. I cried. I could not have found a more perfect song for Mr. Clean and I.

Tuesday

4 days, just 4 more days.

Last night my Mom and I met with the friend who is directing and the friend doing the music. Much to the dismay of them all there will not be a rehearsal. This did not go over well. However, his dad is best man, my matron of honor has been in several weddings, I've been in several weddings and Mr. Clean has performed weddings. It will be just fine, and if it's not it's still going to be just fine.

We went to dinner last night and I told my Mom she had a momzilla moment, because she did. Have you ever watched Bridezillas and seen the bride crying/sobbing because something else has not gone her way. That was my mom on Sunday night when I explained that the clean family can't be there until 12, just in time for pictures but not for a rehearsal.

In email today my mom says that I was wrong to call her that and she just wants everything to be perfect and she's doing all this so I will have a special day, and my mom does want all this. Because I know how she is I did apologize. She does want everything perfect. I have not said the reason I gave you the time frame I did is because if I gave you more time you would KILL yourself from stressing out so much. What she fails to see or understand is that I just want to marry Mr. Clean. If Girl Clean has a meltdown and we have to calm her down, so be it, such is life. If things don't happen just the way they are supposed to, such is life and this would not be any different then how life normally goes.

Our commitment to each other is very important. The songs that we've selected, AMAZING!!!!!!!! BEYOND EXCITED about the music!!!!!! What we promise, is a very big deal. If the wedding itself is less then perfect, who cares, life is about the quirky moments that make special memories!

Work Shower

Today I was blessed, or rather we were blessed. My coworkers had a shower for Mr. Clean and I.

The food, was fabulous!!! Sandwhiches, wings, meatballs, pasta salad, cake, veggies and fruit, all so yummy!!!!!

My sweet friend/coworker who made me birthday cupcakes last year, and has talents that I only dream of made the table center pieces, once she posts pictures I'm going to borrow some so I can show them off.

There were many many gift cards and we will be able to make some purchases that were not needs but wants.

I am truly thankful to work with such an amazing group!!!! Now I think I'm going to go back for some pasta salad!!!!!

Friday

Wow, my wedding is a week from tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We had our final meeting with Pastor T last night, our meeting started at 6:30 we left at 8, it was a wonderful meeting. Quite a bit of the conversation actually had to do with missions, throughout our course of counseling we've often veered into topics not really marriage related but have given us a perspective on where we stand on certain topics, such as missions.

When I say missions I probably need to clarify. I have a dear acquaintance/friend who is in the Phillipines. She is doing amazing work over there, teaching, building, living life in community and while doing all this she is touching lives and through her work she's able to share her faith. Not beating anyone over the head, not condemning, simply being a living walking example of love. Funny enough she is actually supported through my new church, and Pastor T travelled with a group over there and worked with her.

Another missionary supported by the church is in Maldove. Because he has proven that he cares and follows through the communist government has given him several orphanages because they can't afford them. This was a place where on the 16th birthday they turned orphans out with a bus ticket back to their hometown and no education or training and the one in charge was tipping of the human traffickers that they were releasing young girls. The work that he is doing is amazing and he has just been able to build a home for boys too. He lives life every day by working, and being a walking living example of love. Not condemning, not beating anyone over the head but making a difference in the world.

There are more, and I'm so thankful. One of my big things that I like to know about a church is how much do they support reaching out into the world, local and global. The church I grew up in was very focused on reaching out, the church I attended off and on and was attending when I met Mr. Clean is very focused on mission, both local and global. The focus is not beating anyone over the head or condemning but rather going into a new place, or existing local place, forming friendships, making a difference and showing love.

My heart was touched last night as we talked about the children. In so many cultures children have so little value until they can begin to provide an income. A big part of reaching out into these communities is eventually communicating that children do in fact have value and worth.

I know that in the new community where I am moving there are needs. I have been praying that doors will be opened for opportunity. I'm just not sure how or what these opportunities will look like.

I talk about how crazy busy I am and yet I also realize that my desire is for my new normal to include living life beyond myself, if that makes any sense.

Happy Friday all!!!!!

Since March 19th....

I was just thinking since March 19


I travelled to DC and ran the Cherry Blossom 10 Miler race, and had an AMAZING time with Jess, Lisa and Becky!!!!

I found a property manager

Sorted, organized, purged my entire condo where I lived 6 years

Made time for my family from Pittsburgh and California when they came to visit

Made the trip to Boone to pick out my gown

Took my 2nd CIC class and test followed by attending my bridal shower

Had a successful moving sale where I sold more clothes and shoes the my mom thought possible

Moved everything that remained out of my condo and cleaned the condo

Went back to Boone to pick up my gown

Delegated work to the recommended contractor and had my walls touched up and carpets cleaned

Consorted with property manager agreeing with selection of tenants

Worked out agreement with my restaurant manager to be able to keep that job and work Mondays Wednesdays and Fridays because it made more sense when I thought about logistics, and I love my restaurant!!

There's a lot more but these are the highlights. The downside I have not been able to meet up with girlfriends because I'm trying so hard to keep up with everything else. I keep my workouts because these are what keep me sane and it's not a pretty sight if I don't get my workouts in.

Since the wedding thing is my mom's I really haven't had to do much. I did the invitations, I picked out my gown and I typed up the ceremony with Mr. Clean's input. The music will end up being my mom because I don't have time nor desire to work with the friend my mom asked to do the music and besides I really don't care, I just want to get married.

I am looking forward to seeing my friends and I am blessed that so many people love me. I will also be SO VERY THANKFUL when my life begins whatever the new normal will be!!!!!!

Tenants

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I'm a little excited right now. Back when Mr. Clean and I got engaged there was a question of how I would handle my condo. There are things going on that make it un-sellable. Not my building but lovely HOA stuff that is not fun.

I researched property management companies and contacted several. Only one contacted me back. We worked together and my property manager told me it would be best if I could be out of the place 1 week before June 1. So I began working towards this goal.

I was officially out last Tuesday, everything was either at my parents or at the house.

I got a call Sunday that there were people interested. Provided all continues to go according to plan, they sign papers tonight and they are moving in today.

The guy my property manager recommended for paint and cleaning carpets bumped my condo up on his list and it's completely done.

I am so very blessed that this has all fall into place!!!!