My dear friend has explained to me that since I've met a guy who is a definite keeper I need to reign in all thoughts related to past relationships and not focus on these. She has explained to me that this is counterproductive and not helpful when really I need to just focus on my life and moving forward and enjoying the time I have with the wonderful guy who I am with.
So despite the fact that today I'm feeling quite a bit of dislike, hatred and rage I'm working on letting this go. The reality is over the past few years I've actually been in much worse places mentally. I was on a facebook friends blog which connected me to another blog of a friend I went to Jr. High and High School with. For reasons unbeknownst to me she and I have not spoken since High School graduation night. She accepted my FB friend request only to unfriend and block me which I still to this day do not understand. However after reading her blog I really admire her. I don't know what I did or did not do and I do not understand why our friendship ended. While reading her blog I was reminded why we had ever been friends in the first place. She's very very smart, and I love her writing style. She tragically lost her daughter and I don't know the whole story and then exactly one year later God blessed her and her husband with a little boy and then this past September God blessed them with another little girl. In this day and age when medicine is so far advanced you would think that all children would be born with no problems whatsoever and this is just not the case. I have several friends who have all experienced different circumstances that make me understand how precious life and health are. This long ago friend delivered a little girl she would never see grow up. But her testimony to God's faithfulness is amazing and inspiring.
I suppose that when I focus on the many blessings that I have been given I have to stop and let go of the underlying hurt that is causing the feelings of rage and hatred towards Rick. I should never ever ever ever ever ever given him another chance. The most important lesson I learned is that fundamentally people don't change and once a romantic relationship is over cut them out of your life and cut them out entirely they no longer need to be any part of your life. The caveat to this is when you are friends with members of their family I still think this is ok so long as your friendship has nothing to do with them and their name comes up as infrequently as possible!
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
November 24, 2009
It's been a while there has been a lot going on. I am thankful for the way things work out, primarily that I have a new job. I also have a new guy who seems to be a keeper.
I made the mistake of looking up the guy I dated for a brief few weeks this summer. The one who told me that this time around would be different and blah blah blah. So his profile pic is of him and his girlfriend who he dated before me who he told me the million reasons why he broke up with her. Some days I really do hate FB. My friend PYS hates it for different reasons then I do but for me sometimes it's just not fun to see information like that. I'm the one who goes looking so yes it's my fault.
Seeing that picture just ticked me off. However if I evaluate as I'm about to do I will remember why I'm on the better end of the situation...
Here goes:
My life is relatively uncomplicated by baby mama drama and now that I have a fabulous new job the money situation is turning around for me. Granted the roommate and second job help tremendously too!!!!
The guy had issues with the fact that I was "too thin" which was total BS. His pic shows that the new girlfriends has gained a little weight since I met her. This seems to be his thing so fantastic for him. As for me I would rather be happy with me then trying to constantly justify that I wasn't "too thin" that in itself just irritates me. I mean REALLY let me point out the fact that I work very hard and I fight the weight battle every single day and I REFUSE to gain or lose weight for anyone other than ME. Now do I want to lose weight, you better believe it but I'm training for a 1/2 marathon so I'm hoping that it will help because unfortunately I managed to gain 10lbs in the span of 3 weeks. I ran a 15K and thought I could "treat" myself and "treated" myself right back up the scale, aaarrgghhh!!!
Ok so now back to the positives... This new guy well he's the nicest most considerate thoughtful, sweet, caring, amazing man I've ever dated. I can say this now because it's been a few weeks. I am taking things slow b/c as my recent dating history of this year has shown the ones who are all flash in the begining fizzle just as quickly and permanently. So with this sweetheart I'm taking it slow.
I'll give some details of just how fabulous this man is.
He is originally from Michigan, he graduated undergrad and continued on to CHAPEL HILL DENTAL SCHOOL, one of the top programs in the country!!! He is tall, 6'3 and the way I met him... well this is a wonderful amazing story
I ran my first 10K on September 26, I was still REELING from the SC jerk so I decided to do Match to get on with my life. I met several guys and was talking to them and I didn't really thing too much about this guy who came up behind me and gave me this grin like "I'm going to pass you, haha.." so I kept ahead of him til the very end when he actually beat me in b/c I was about TO DIE from exhaustion!! So unbeknownst to me I made an impression. He went home and tried to figure out who I was but didn't have my first or last name so he had no luck.
I had 2 dates the following day and there was another guy from the past who was still in the present but eventually I wrote all of them off for one reason or other. During this same time I had something else going on. On September 8th my running buddy and dear friend emailed me that there was an opening at her company that I would be perfect for. Realizing that my relationship was over I emailed her my resume. I then went online and applied for the posting. A week later I had a telephone interview, the following Wednesday (September 23) I had an interview at the Charlotte Office. I walked out of the meeting and said to the Lord that no matter what happened I would praise and serve him but if this was the door that He was opening I would be most thankful!!
A week later on Tuesday September 29 I was called with an offer. I was told to sleep on it and I accepted the following day, I put in my notice on October 1. October 15 was my last day at that job. A nightmare that seemed to never end had finally drawn to it's conclusion. It was a time for new beginings and GREAT things!!
I ran a 15K that Saturday October 17. Around mile 7 this guy comes up and goes "hey I recognize you from the 10K".. thinking he was pretty cute and impressed that he remembered me I smiled and asked how he was then we started running, again I'm DYING and just trying to finish this by running the whole thing!! So I let him go on and I kept putting one foot in front of the other. At the end of the run he is waiting with a cup of water and as he's saying "I'm Shawn" I'm saying "I'm Lori". We chatted for a mintue, I said good run and then I had to go. But he was really intriguing to me and I decided to look him up. I had kind of been talking to one guy but he just wasn't that in to me and I was certainly free to see others. So I looked this guy up thru the race results, figured out his last name, found him on facebook and sent a message saying how nice it was to meet him, if he didn't respond and we happened to see each other again it would be like no message was ever sent and then I waited. I figured out from his FB that he was a dentist and that he liked Jack Johnson and Green Day. He would respond to my message later on that day and the conversations would begin via email. That following Thursday he called me and we talked for almost 2 hours. He worked numerous jobs thru college and had worked in restaurants which I always appreciate with my restaurant background. We agreed to go on a date that Sunday and decided to go to the White Water Park. We were going to try Kayaking but it was much too cold. That was October 25. We had our following date the next Friday, then went out Saturday night, then hung out Sunday and our dogs met each other. He has a Rottweiler St Bernard Mix, Snickers is a sweetheart and she LOVES to chase Jack. Sophie is a standard poodle puppy and she's all legs and she and Jack play and play and play and play and play some more and provide endless hours of entertainment for one another.
The next Sunday we went to my first Hockey game, the following Saturday we went to Atlanta for a concert. He finds reasons to stop and see me on Mondays when he's in town on errands. He's very very smart, very handsome, very wonderful. I met him at the end of a 15K race when I can not possibly have looked worse and he though I was pretty. I would come to find out later he had looked me up on Facebook after figuring out my name but did not send me a message his words "that would have made me crazy stalker guy" I said "honey I sent you a message" to which he responded "yes but you are pretty". He and I are training for the Miami 1/2 marathon. He's buying my plane ticket down. It's the coolest thing ever to be able to turn dates into training sessions. Saturday morning we went for an 8 mile run, it was long and cold and difficult but we did it together.
So really when I refocus on my life and all that's going right how can I even really be irritated or upset. I'm the luckiest girl in the world and my life is fabulous!!!
I made the mistake of looking up the guy I dated for a brief few weeks this summer. The one who told me that this time around would be different and blah blah blah. So his profile pic is of him and his girlfriend who he dated before me who he told me the million reasons why he broke up with her. Some days I really do hate FB. My friend PYS hates it for different reasons then I do but for me sometimes it's just not fun to see information like that. I'm the one who goes looking so yes it's my fault.
Seeing that picture just ticked me off. However if I evaluate as I'm about to do I will remember why I'm on the better end of the situation...
Here goes:
My life is relatively uncomplicated by baby mama drama and now that I have a fabulous new job the money situation is turning around for me. Granted the roommate and second job help tremendously too!!!!
The guy had issues with the fact that I was "too thin" which was total BS. His pic shows that the new girlfriends has gained a little weight since I met her. This seems to be his thing so fantastic for him. As for me I would rather be happy with me then trying to constantly justify that I wasn't "too thin" that in itself just irritates me. I mean REALLY let me point out the fact that I work very hard and I fight the weight battle every single day and I REFUSE to gain or lose weight for anyone other than ME. Now do I want to lose weight, you better believe it but I'm training for a 1/2 marathon so I'm hoping that it will help because unfortunately I managed to gain 10lbs in the span of 3 weeks. I ran a 15K and thought I could "treat" myself and "treated" myself right back up the scale, aaarrgghhh!!!
Ok so now back to the positives... This new guy well he's the nicest most considerate thoughtful, sweet, caring, amazing man I've ever dated. I can say this now because it's been a few weeks. I am taking things slow b/c as my recent dating history of this year has shown the ones who are all flash in the begining fizzle just as quickly and permanently. So with this sweetheart I'm taking it slow.
I'll give some details of just how fabulous this man is.
He is originally from Michigan, he graduated undergrad and continued on to CHAPEL HILL DENTAL SCHOOL, one of the top programs in the country!!! He is tall, 6'3 and the way I met him... well this is a wonderful amazing story
I ran my first 10K on September 26, I was still REELING from the SC jerk so I decided to do Match to get on with my life. I met several guys and was talking to them and I didn't really thing too much about this guy who came up behind me and gave me this grin like "I'm going to pass you, haha.." so I kept ahead of him til the very end when he actually beat me in b/c I was about TO DIE from exhaustion!! So unbeknownst to me I made an impression. He went home and tried to figure out who I was but didn't have my first or last name so he had no luck.
I had 2 dates the following day and there was another guy from the past who was still in the present but eventually I wrote all of them off for one reason or other. During this same time I had something else going on. On September 8th my running buddy and dear friend emailed me that there was an opening at her company that I would be perfect for. Realizing that my relationship was over I emailed her my resume. I then went online and applied for the posting. A week later I had a telephone interview, the following Wednesday (September 23) I had an interview at the Charlotte Office. I walked out of the meeting and said to the Lord that no matter what happened I would praise and serve him but if this was the door that He was opening I would be most thankful!!
A week later on Tuesday September 29 I was called with an offer. I was told to sleep on it and I accepted the following day, I put in my notice on October 1. October 15 was my last day at that job. A nightmare that seemed to never end had finally drawn to it's conclusion. It was a time for new beginings and GREAT things!!
I ran a 15K that Saturday October 17. Around mile 7 this guy comes up and goes "hey I recognize you from the 10K".. thinking he was pretty cute and impressed that he remembered me I smiled and asked how he was then we started running, again I'm DYING and just trying to finish this by running the whole thing!! So I let him go on and I kept putting one foot in front of the other. At the end of the run he is waiting with a cup of water and as he's saying "I'm Shawn" I'm saying "I'm Lori". We chatted for a mintue, I said good run and then I had to go. But he was really intriguing to me and I decided to look him up. I had kind of been talking to one guy but he just wasn't that in to me and I was certainly free to see others. So I looked this guy up thru the race results, figured out his last name, found him on facebook and sent a message saying how nice it was to meet him, if he didn't respond and we happened to see each other again it would be like no message was ever sent and then I waited. I figured out from his FB that he was a dentist and that he liked Jack Johnson and Green Day. He would respond to my message later on that day and the conversations would begin via email. That following Thursday he called me and we talked for almost 2 hours. He worked numerous jobs thru college and had worked in restaurants which I always appreciate with my restaurant background. We agreed to go on a date that Sunday and decided to go to the White Water Park. We were going to try Kayaking but it was much too cold. That was October 25. We had our following date the next Friday, then went out Saturday night, then hung out Sunday and our dogs met each other. He has a Rottweiler St Bernard Mix, Snickers is a sweetheart and she LOVES to chase Jack. Sophie is a standard poodle puppy and she's all legs and she and Jack play and play and play and play and play some more and provide endless hours of entertainment for one another.
The next Sunday we went to my first Hockey game, the following Saturday we went to Atlanta for a concert. He finds reasons to stop and see me on Mondays when he's in town on errands. He's very very smart, very handsome, very wonderful. I met him at the end of a 15K race when I can not possibly have looked worse and he though I was pretty. I would come to find out later he had looked me up on Facebook after figuring out my name but did not send me a message his words "that would have made me crazy stalker guy" I said "honey I sent you a message" to which he responded "yes but you are pretty". He and I are training for the Miami 1/2 marathon. He's buying my plane ticket down. It's the coolest thing ever to be able to turn dates into training sessions. Saturday morning we went for an 8 mile run, it was long and cold and difficult but we did it together.
So really when I refocus on my life and all that's going right how can I even really be irritated or upset. I'm the luckiest girl in the world and my life is fabulous!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)