So Friday morning very early the boy and I headed to the airport. We made it in plenty of time and got thru the bag checks and the security lines. We rested while waiting and then they boarded the plane to Atlanta.
We arrived in Atlanta and had a short layover before our connecting flight to Miami. I was so excited as this was my first visit to Miami. Once we touched down and picked up our bags and rode the shuttle to the car place it was afternoon. We got our car and drove to South Beach. We took a long walk on the beach in our bathings suits and shorts. Back home it was freezing cold and they were calling for wintry weather. So I did what any girl would do and sent the lovely beach picture to my friends and family back in NC =)
Once S's brother got off work we met at the condo and changed clothes for a dinner out at a really cool place somewhere in Miami. It's very crowded here as there are a lot of football fans in town for the Pro Bowl as well as the thousands of people in town for the marathon.
Yesterday was an easy day we had to go to the expo to pick up packets and we had a really yummy late lunch at another very cool place. S and I split a seafood cobb salad and a veggie pizza.
Last night we took a walk down to where the race was starting so we would know how to get there.
This morning we were supposed to be leaving by around 5:10 well we both overslept so that meant we didn't actually leave til 5:26. It worked out ok we made it in plenty of time to find our place and even after the gun went off at 6:15 we still had to wait til about 6:30 to cross the start line. The race was on. I stayed with S for the first 11 miles but at mile 11 I had to back off and just let him go on. I ran the WHOLE 13.1 miles!!! It was such a rush to finish the 1/2 marathon today. At 10:30 I pointed out to him that we have already run 13 miles and we've walked quite a bit too. His brothers house is about a mile and a half away from where the race started and finished and we walked it both ways.
This morning I really appreciated the fact that S, who is not really a morning person, still woke up happy. He wasn't a crab at the fact that we were running behind schedule. He was still his very sweet self. Walking to the race we were both happy and excited. The thing about S he is usually in a good mood. We've been dating for just over 3 months and he is unfailingly kind, thoughtful, generous, amazing. I just look at him sometimes and I'm so appreciative of how he is, just as a person. He's been driving while we are here in Miami and it's a good thing because drivers down here are CRAZY!! I really appreciate my wonderful guy and how he takes on life. He's just amazing!
S figures we ran the race somewhere between a 10-11 minute mile we won't know results for sure until later on this afternoon. I'm just so excited that we finished and it was a respectable time and we have really cool medals!! Now we're just relaxing and recouping!
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Ex-Boyfriends Lose Friend Rights
I have determined that no ex boyfriends receive second chances again. After the fiasco mistake of the summer where I was going to pick up and move because I actually believed that he had changed and that this was really it I realized that I needed to just cut any ex boyfriends out of my life.
There is a line in SATC where they are talking about men and Charlotte says that men are for dating and women are for friendship and I completely agree.
I can't really blanket the statement as there are a few ex's as FB friends but I don't talk to them. They have requested to be a friend and I have accepted but I don't want to talk to them. If they deleted me I would be completely ok with it.
There is a line in SATC where they are talking about men and Charlotte says that men are for dating and women are for friendship and I completely agree.
I can't really blanket the statement as there are a few ex's as FB friends but I don't talk to them. They have requested to be a friend and I have accepted but I don't want to talk to them. If they deleted me I would be completely ok with it.
All I can do is smile and be nice
I've mentioned in previous posts about my former running buddy. It's hurt my feelings that things have become the way that they have. I like and respect this person (although like now may not apply but I do respect her). I thought that maybe things would just slowly go back to normal. Really I no longer know what to say to her. I haven't since we had the conversation that night where she told me that I was a bad friend and horrible person and I replaced her.
I do understand that turning 30 is hard. I do understand that she is under a tremendous amount of stress. I would love to say hey do you want to run a race but then really I don't b/c to me it would just be akward.
I do smile and say good morning or whatever when we pass in the office. Fortunately for me she is on the road a lot. Unfortunately for me we are on the same team which means that I have to be really cautious in how I deal with this situation. She works with my underwriter and I with our agents.
This morning I had gone to put creamer in my coffee and was walking back to my desk and a coworker had come in the door and we were walking together she smiled and greeted him completely effectively ignoring me in her greeting.
While I can be nice I'm really still irritated by her attitude. She feels that she is right and I'm a terrible person. Not true but I've gone into all this before.
I just want to scream "GET A GRIP" but I won't. I will continue to smile and be polite and respect her for the job she does all the while continuing to think what is wrong with you???
I do understand that turning 30 is hard. I do understand that she is under a tremendous amount of stress. I would love to say hey do you want to run a race but then really I don't b/c to me it would just be akward.
I do smile and say good morning or whatever when we pass in the office. Fortunately for me she is on the road a lot. Unfortunately for me we are on the same team which means that I have to be really cautious in how I deal with this situation. She works with my underwriter and I with our agents.
This morning I had gone to put creamer in my coffee and was walking back to my desk and a coworker had come in the door and we were walking together she smiled and greeted him completely effectively ignoring me in her greeting.
While I can be nice I'm really still irritated by her attitude. She feels that she is right and I'm a terrible person. Not true but I've gone into all this before.
I just want to scream "GET A GRIP" but I won't. I will continue to smile and be polite and respect her for the job she does all the while continuing to think what is wrong with you???
Work A Round
So I was a little spoiled at my previous job in one way, I had access to the internet. Perhaps this was not the best thing b/c I did spend quite a bit of time facebooking! However since I didn't take lunches and often worked ridiculously long days I felt that it all evened out in the end.
With the current job certain site, and all social networking and email sites are blocked. I discovered I can still access my blog. So thru accessing my blog I see my friends and then when I'm taking my 5 minute mental sanity break I go and read friends of friends and some are so fascinating that I have decided to follow those too. To me it's always interesting to see about other people's lives. It's why I like facebook so much, I have the opportunity to keep up with people which for me is fantastic since life is so short and there is always so much to do!
With the current job certain site, and all social networking and email sites are blocked. I discovered I can still access my blog. So thru accessing my blog I see my friends and then when I'm taking my 5 minute mental sanity break I go and read friends of friends and some are so fascinating that I have decided to follow those too. To me it's always interesting to see about other people's lives. It's why I like facebook so much, I have the opportunity to keep up with people which for me is fantastic since life is so short and there is always so much to do!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Blessings
5 years ago I visited the location that would become my very own tiny little shoebox, aka my condo. 600 and some square feet is not big but the open layout of the living room kitchen and the big enough for me and a roommate bathroom and 2 bedrooms is my space and I really love it.
When I first started working on the financing I had to pay off a few credit cards and I had only a few months to do this. I worked SO HARD and I did it! I understood going into the process that I would be doing an 80/20 loan. I would put the bulk of the mortgage on a 5 year arm mortgage and 20% on a HELOC (home equity line of credit). In talking with the mortgage broker we agreed that in 5 years (I was 25 at the time) I would probably not still be there. So I closed and about a year later I got out of the adjustable rate HELOC b/c it was already starting to increase and I worked for Wachovia at the time and was able to close without having to pay closing costs.
November of 2008 I started talking to mortgage brokers about getting out of the 5 year arm. The catch was I was going to have to come up with closing costs or provide up front money or a variety of other hurdles that I just couldn't jump at that point in time. Finally in September my Mom loaned me the money so that I could get started with Wachovia now Wells Fargo to get the 5 year arm refinanced. When the appraisal came back less than expected Wells Fargo told me, oops sorry the money ($500) is ours, here's your appraisal (that is absolutely worthless to me but is what the money went to) and we can't help you, at all. They told me to call Bank of America who had recently been approved for a Government program. I might not agree with our government all the time but I am CERTAINLY thankful for this program. It was $35 to pay for them to pull my credit and I close tomorrow moving my mortgage from a 5 year ARM to a fixed rate mortgage. I am SO THANKFUL!.
Over the summer I believed that I was going to be selling my place in order to move to SC. I am fortunate that once again I was saved from a bad decision. I fell hook line and sinker all over again for someone who never deserved the chance to begin with.
So today I have many reasons to be thankful! I have wonderful family and friends! I have a very nice little condo that is mine and will be for a long time! I have 2 fantastic jobs that I enjoy! I have many blessing to count!
When I first started working on the financing I had to pay off a few credit cards and I had only a few months to do this. I worked SO HARD and I did it! I understood going into the process that I would be doing an 80/20 loan. I would put the bulk of the mortgage on a 5 year arm mortgage and 20% on a HELOC (home equity line of credit). In talking with the mortgage broker we agreed that in 5 years (I was 25 at the time) I would probably not still be there. So I closed and about a year later I got out of the adjustable rate HELOC b/c it was already starting to increase and I worked for Wachovia at the time and was able to close without having to pay closing costs.
November of 2008 I started talking to mortgage brokers about getting out of the 5 year arm. The catch was I was going to have to come up with closing costs or provide up front money or a variety of other hurdles that I just couldn't jump at that point in time. Finally in September my Mom loaned me the money so that I could get started with Wachovia now Wells Fargo to get the 5 year arm refinanced. When the appraisal came back less than expected Wells Fargo told me, oops sorry the money ($500) is ours, here's your appraisal (that is absolutely worthless to me but is what the money went to) and we can't help you, at all. They told me to call Bank of America who had recently been approved for a Government program. I might not agree with our government all the time but I am CERTAINLY thankful for this program. It was $35 to pay for them to pull my credit and I close tomorrow moving my mortgage from a 5 year ARM to a fixed rate mortgage. I am SO THANKFUL!.
Over the summer I believed that I was going to be selling my place in order to move to SC. I am fortunate that once again I was saved from a bad decision. I fell hook line and sinker all over again for someone who never deserved the chance to begin with.
So today I have many reasons to be thankful! I have wonderful family and friends! I have a very nice little condo that is mine and will be for a long time! I have 2 fantastic jobs that I enjoy! I have many blessing to count!
Friday, January 22, 2010
I love a deal!
Last Friday at this time I was driving the car with my Mom and Dad as passengers and we were on our way to Pittsburgh PA. My Godparents live there along with my Godsister Kristy, her husband Denny and the girls Mia and Sarah. We arrived Friday afternoon and spent time catching up. Had yummy Lasagna!! Then Saturday morning I woke up early, tried to go for a longer run than 5 miles but on the treadmill 5 was as much as I could tolerate and then I got ready. The girls hit the outlets in Grove City PA. It was a wonderful day filled with deals! The NY&Co outlet store was closing and everything in the store was $3.99. Kristy and I racked up! Then Gap and Old Navy had 50% and40% off all lowest priced clearance so we found some steals. My favorite is the cute little tunic dress that was $4.97 and then $2.50 and my mom got a dress for $1.98. I just love a good deal!!
Sunday we went to church then a yummy lunch at Bravo's then a little more shopping. My sweet boyfriend dogsat for Jack so I got him a Pittsburgh mug, some Kona coffee and a bottle of wine. Sunday evening was laid back and relaxed and then we drove back on Monday.
Sunday we went to church then a yummy lunch at Bravo's then a little more shopping. My sweet boyfriend dogsat for Jack so I got him a Pittsburgh mug, some Kona coffee and a bottle of wine. Sunday evening was laid back and relaxed and then we drove back on Monday.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Acceptance or at least temporarily giving up
For years and years I have struggled with my weight. I have fought the increasing numbers on the scale. When I was a little girl I remember always wanting to wear long skirts because my legs were so much fatter than the other girls my age. I didn't really like to do anything active other than ballet and while I did this once a week it wasn't enough to balance out what I was eating. In looking back at pictures from when I was 9 & 10 I really wasn't super huge. Once I hit 11 the weight really started to pack on. I think I ate a lot and I know I wasn't active enough. I liked to read and write stories and I didn't have any idea how to change what I was. I would pray that I would wake up thin.
By the time I was 13 I topped out the scale at around 218 pounds. If I remember correctly as this has now been 17 years ago and I have blocked a lot of things. I was fat, obese, and I didn't fit the cute clothes that other girls my age could wear.
Growing up I remember my parents always on one diet or another and my mom was good about working out. She had a nordic track and she liked to walk. She and my Dad also liked to eat. We went to Bojangles every Sunday with their group of friends and they would sit and talk for hours. So this factored into me not understanding a healthy pattern when it came to food and excercise. I certainly don't fault my parents, they did the best that they could on the tight budget they had to work with.
I lost weight when I got sick and I think I hit a growth spurt and I remember that I was around 180 pounds at the end of my 8th grade year and before starting high school.
High school I don't remember all that much. I never fit in but to my knowledge I wasn't made fun of for my size or weight either. It may have happened behind my back but I wasn't aware of it. I think my brother heard some of it but he has never ever told me this. By the time I was a junior in high school I know I was around a size 16. Senior year of high school I think I may have lost some weight but it's hard for me to remember. Through college I struggled. Your body processes alcohol differently than food and I definitely drank in college. The difference between me and a lot of other people doing this was I wasn't eating. I knew when we were going to be drinking and I would avoid food to try and cancel out the calories. My roommate knew what I was doing and she would often times make sure that later on in the evening I had something to eat.
By senior year of college I was working out regularly because I wanted to be a flight attendant and I knew I needed to be a certain size to do this. So I was about a size 12 when I graduated from App. I moved back to Charlotte and started working and kept working out. The flight attendant thing fell through because the airlines weren't hiring, this was 2001. I ran into Rick December of that year and because of that I lost a whole lot of weight, having your heart broken into a million pieces and having someone play head games with you will enable you to go for days without eating. I dropped to a size 8. In December of 02 I met another guy and we started dating and I gained most of the weight back. When he and I broke up in September 03 I was working out regularly again and had started to reclaim my size 8 clothes. In April 04 my friend M got married and I remember I actually got hit on while laying out at the pool at the hotel where we were staying and he was hot! I was working 2 jobs and through that summer I was travelling to Atlanta fairly often since I was dating someone down there. I planned to move but he and I broke up in September 04. So then I started dating and it was an interesting time in my life. I actually met a guy on December 18, 2004 who I would hang out with on and off for while. He wasn't one for committment and that April 05 I finally had to let him go (although it would be a while before he was completely out of my life). I bought my house in May 05 and I was the thinnest I'd ever been at 145 pounds. I was also working 2 jobs and taking prescription diet pills. I look back at pictures now and I wish I could be that thin again, I'm just not sure how since I can't get the diet pills any longer and I don't know that my body will ever let me get back to that weight again.
I started dating the creep who took me to Charleston and that had a bad ending and then I took a break from dating only to meet another jerk who had a cocaine problem that I didn't know about and then after that I met a guy who fascinated me but he didn't have time for a relationship. After him Ballantyne guy came into the picture but I ditched him for the college boyfriend and then it was between the two of them that whole summer and by end of summer they were both out of the picture and I started dating the guy with the little girl in September 06. I also gained A LOT of weight over that period of time and topped out in June 07 when I realized I absolutely HAD to get back to the gym. I did and he and I broke up and I had a long road ahead of me to lose weight.
I started running in February of last year and dropped weight. In fact I was 4 pounds away from my goal in October 09. Then I started training for my 1/2 marathon and started dating my current boyfriend. Somehow I managed to add 10 lbs back. I currently weight more than I want to but I'm tired. I'm tired of this battle that has been going on for so long. Am I happy with how I look, no. Would I like to lose weight, yes. I'm just tired, I give up. I can't fight any longer. For now I'm not going to fight. I will continue to track calories and food and I will continue to excercise but I give up. If my body is going to stay at this weight then it's going to stay at this weight.
By the time I was 13 I topped out the scale at around 218 pounds. If I remember correctly as this has now been 17 years ago and I have blocked a lot of things. I was fat, obese, and I didn't fit the cute clothes that other girls my age could wear.
Growing up I remember my parents always on one diet or another and my mom was good about working out. She had a nordic track and she liked to walk. She and my Dad also liked to eat. We went to Bojangles every Sunday with their group of friends and they would sit and talk for hours. So this factored into me not understanding a healthy pattern when it came to food and excercise. I certainly don't fault my parents, they did the best that they could on the tight budget they had to work with.
I lost weight when I got sick and I think I hit a growth spurt and I remember that I was around 180 pounds at the end of my 8th grade year and before starting high school.
High school I don't remember all that much. I never fit in but to my knowledge I wasn't made fun of for my size or weight either. It may have happened behind my back but I wasn't aware of it. I think my brother heard some of it but he has never ever told me this. By the time I was a junior in high school I know I was around a size 16. Senior year of high school I think I may have lost some weight but it's hard for me to remember. Through college I struggled. Your body processes alcohol differently than food and I definitely drank in college. The difference between me and a lot of other people doing this was I wasn't eating. I knew when we were going to be drinking and I would avoid food to try and cancel out the calories. My roommate knew what I was doing and she would often times make sure that later on in the evening I had something to eat.
By senior year of college I was working out regularly because I wanted to be a flight attendant and I knew I needed to be a certain size to do this. So I was about a size 12 when I graduated from App. I moved back to Charlotte and started working and kept working out. The flight attendant thing fell through because the airlines weren't hiring, this was 2001. I ran into Rick December of that year and because of that I lost a whole lot of weight, having your heart broken into a million pieces and having someone play head games with you will enable you to go for days without eating. I dropped to a size 8. In December of 02 I met another guy and we started dating and I gained most of the weight back. When he and I broke up in September 03 I was working out regularly again and had started to reclaim my size 8 clothes. In April 04 my friend M got married and I remember I actually got hit on while laying out at the pool at the hotel where we were staying and he was hot! I was working 2 jobs and through that summer I was travelling to Atlanta fairly often since I was dating someone down there. I planned to move but he and I broke up in September 04. So then I started dating and it was an interesting time in my life. I actually met a guy on December 18, 2004 who I would hang out with on and off for while. He wasn't one for committment and that April 05 I finally had to let him go (although it would be a while before he was completely out of my life). I bought my house in May 05 and I was the thinnest I'd ever been at 145 pounds. I was also working 2 jobs and taking prescription diet pills. I look back at pictures now and I wish I could be that thin again, I'm just not sure how since I can't get the diet pills any longer and I don't know that my body will ever let me get back to that weight again.
I started dating the creep who took me to Charleston and that had a bad ending and then I took a break from dating only to meet another jerk who had a cocaine problem that I didn't know about and then after that I met a guy who fascinated me but he didn't have time for a relationship. After him Ballantyne guy came into the picture but I ditched him for the college boyfriend and then it was between the two of them that whole summer and by end of summer they were both out of the picture and I started dating the guy with the little girl in September 06. I also gained A LOT of weight over that period of time and topped out in June 07 when I realized I absolutely HAD to get back to the gym. I did and he and I broke up and I had a long road ahead of me to lose weight.
I started running in February of last year and dropped weight. In fact I was 4 pounds away from my goal in October 09. Then I started training for my 1/2 marathon and started dating my current boyfriend. Somehow I managed to add 10 lbs back. I currently weight more than I want to but I'm tired. I'm tired of this battle that has been going on for so long. Am I happy with how I look, no. Would I like to lose weight, yes. I'm just tired, I give up. I can't fight any longer. For now I'm not going to fight. I will continue to track calories and food and I will continue to excercise but I give up. If my body is going to stay at this weight then it's going to stay at this weight.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Christmas in January
Sunday afternoon my fabulous guy ran errands with me. We started at Kohls to return the espresso/cappuccino maker that was missing pieces and we exchanged this for a food dehydrator since they no longer had the item I had originally purchased. We then went to the Hallmark to check and see if they had an ornament I was looking for (they did not) next to Hallmark was the pet store where we picked up the special shampoo for the poodle. We moved from here to Panera where we grabbed a quick lunch before driving down to Northlake. I wanted to check the Hallmark there and then also return the extra shirt that Children's Place sold to me.
My original Christmas present was to have been a new bike. However, we had discussed maybe purchasing running clothes instead. When this was first offered to me I said no b/c the Bike was something we planned to do together. However, after my long run on Saturday I realized I needed new running gear ASAP. So he took me to Dick's Sporting Goods and patiently waited while I looked and tried on different pieces and then purchased 2 pairs of pants, 2 long sleeve shirts, 2 sports bras and 1 short sleeve shirts. Running clothes are EXPENSIVE! I went ahead and opted for running clothes b/c as expensive as they were they are still not as expensive as the bike would have been.
My original Christmas present was to have been a new bike. However, we had discussed maybe purchasing running clothes instead. When this was first offered to me I said no b/c the Bike was something we planned to do together. However, after my long run on Saturday I realized I needed new running gear ASAP. So he took me to Dick's Sporting Goods and patiently waited while I looked and tried on different pieces and then purchased 2 pairs of pants, 2 long sleeve shirts, 2 sports bras and 1 short sleeve shirts. Running clothes are EXPENSIVE! I went ahead and opted for running clothes b/c as expensive as they were they are still not as expensive as the bike would have been.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Running
I started running in February 2008. I ran my first race, a 4miler, in March then in April, May & June I ran 5K's. In July I ran another 4miler. After that I decided to challenge myself further and sign up for a 10K. I ran a 5K in August and September along with running my first 10K on September 26. I then challenged myself further and began training for a 15K that would be in October of 2009. Something I noticed after that 15K and then as I began to train for the 1/2 marathon is the scale quit moving downward. Granted my eating habits are not the greatest but I do track my calories and fitness. As much as I run and excercise I would have felt that I should still see a decreasing scale. Last night when I got home I stepped on the scale, now I had stepped on after my run Saturday and then last night and there was a 7lb difference. I understand there are varying factors and I didn’t freak out but I did decide to post a question about this. I keep track of calories and exercise on Sparkpeople.com and they have message boards where you can ask questions. I asked about the fact that last year all while I was running the weight was falling off but when I started training and running longer distances I’ve noticed an increase. I had a response from a “ spark people coach” who ran a marathon in October. She told me this is actually normal and while she was training for her full marathon she actually gained 4lbs b/c your body holds onto water and nutrients. Now I know I’m not crazy and I’m trying hard to remember that the fact that I can run the distance that I’ve run is pretty amazing considering where I started at last February. She also recommended a book and I am truly thinking about going and checking it out. Here’s the link I found for the book http://www.nancyclarkrd.com/books/sportsnutrition.asp
I struggle with not allowing the numbers on the scale to affect my mood. I know that when I increase my water intake it helps to reduce the scale. I know that this is a lifelong struggle and not something I can just forget about. Running has become a huge personal challenge. I ran 12:43 miles on Saturday, the farthest distance I have ever run. When I really think about how far I ran I'm amazed at what I accomplished. So when I get discouraged by the scale I guess I'm really not being fair to myself.
I struggle with not allowing the numbers on the scale to affect my mood. I know that when I increase my water intake it helps to reduce the scale. I know that this is a lifelong struggle and not something I can just forget about. Running has become a huge personal challenge. I ran 12:43 miles on Saturday, the farthest distance I have ever run. When I really think about how far I ran I'm amazed at what I accomplished. So when I get discouraged by the scale I guess I'm really not being fair to myself.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Conflicted
I've written a few times about this wonderful new guy in my life. I love the story of how we met. I love hanging out with him. I love that his 2 dogs and Jack get along so wonderfully well. I love that he helps others and takes care of people.
What concerns me most is the fact that I know he's not a Christian. I do think he believes in God. He grew up going to church. However, he does not have any desire to go to church now. This is not exactly a topic I can bring up at this point in time. He and I have only been dating 2 months. I feel that I'm going to wait until after we get done with the 1/2 marathon and then talk to him about it.
I'm not sure I can see a future with someone who I just know doesn't have a personal relationship with the Lord. I know that I could meet a Christian guy and he could 180 on me and quit going to church. I've thought about that. I've thought about the fact that this guy is actually a better guy than the last 2 Christian guys that I dated.
I have no idea where I stand with this guy which is part of what complicates me bringing up this subject. I understand I have to take things slow and I can't bring up subjects like marriage and children until he does. I did make sure that he wants children and he does. But I had to leave it at that. What happens if we do have children, I definitely want to bring my children up going to church and passing along to them the understanding of having a relationship with the Lord, a better relationship then the one that I've had.
So here I am with a guy that has all the qualities I've been looking for except for the one that I find the most important of all.
What concerns me most is the fact that I know he's not a Christian. I do think he believes in God. He grew up going to church. However, he does not have any desire to go to church now. This is not exactly a topic I can bring up at this point in time. He and I have only been dating 2 months. I feel that I'm going to wait until after we get done with the 1/2 marathon and then talk to him about it.
I'm not sure I can see a future with someone who I just know doesn't have a personal relationship with the Lord. I know that I could meet a Christian guy and he could 180 on me and quit going to church. I've thought about that. I've thought about the fact that this guy is actually a better guy than the last 2 Christian guys that I dated.
I have no idea where I stand with this guy which is part of what complicates me bringing up this subject. I understand I have to take things slow and I can't bring up subjects like marriage and children until he does. I did make sure that he wants children and he does. But I had to leave it at that. What happens if we do have children, I definitely want to bring my children up going to church and passing along to them the understanding of having a relationship with the Lord, a better relationship then the one that I've had.
So here I am with a guy that has all the qualities I've been looking for except for the one that I find the most important of all.
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