Saturday Run

I closed last night but since it was sooooooo sloooooowwwww (46 people total) I was able to leave at 10. I was up late on Facebook IM so my plan to be out the door by 6 didn't happen. However, we're having a beautiful welcome break in the heat and this morning was GORGEOUS!! Cool breeze, fabulous!! I was out the door at 7 and I knew I had to get 9 miles in. Overall time 1:40, no it's not by any stretch of the imagination fast. But I've determined for my longer runs to enjoy them and if my pace is excruciatingly slow, so be it. I will work on speed and pace on my shorter runs. So my total mileage for the week was 17, not a lot but it's moving me towards the ATL 13.1 in October.

After the run I stopped in at the Verizon store. My phone was not vibrating, the end/power button didn't work and it wasn't locking, which meant I might accidentally call people. I was fortunate that it was a warranty thing and they replaced my phone with a new one, and not just a new one but the newer version since they no longer have mine available (LG Envy 2).

I have to work tonight, closing again. I'm thinking I need a nap before I have to start getting ready :)

Show Us Your Life Friday - Kelly's Korner

I really hesitated to post this one because my own walk is so so so far from perfect. But I have appreciated the posts and so I'm sharing. I've talked about it on here before, I grew up in a Christian household. 3 year old preschool through the 8th grade I was in school at the same place where we went to church each Sunday. I often felt like if the doors were open it meant we were there. For the most part I resented it. I didn't like myself so I resented God. I had wonderfully, amazing teachers and looking back I appreciate what was given to me. I never made my faith my own though. I started high school at a new school (although we went to the same church still). My high school is best described as the school shown in the movie with Mandy Moore, "Saved". Not all bad but that's a perfect idea of what it was like. I do have to say that I was blessed with some wonderful teachers who were excellent. I am thankful I was given a wonderful opportunity and I appreciate what my parents sacrificed for me to have the education that I do. I went to college to leave all the past in the past and move on. The experience of college taught me about life beyond the small world that I knew. Not everyone thinks like I do, not everyone believes the same way that I do. I started to think about things for myself. I started to question what I believed and why and why do I find it so important. Romans 5:7-8 "Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
Romans 3:23-24 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” I heard a message at Forest Hill church on April 10, 2010 and the guest speaker defined the term sin and it's origin, in the days of archery you would have someone stand beside the target and when they didn't hit the bulls eye that person standing there would yell sin 6 inches or sin 4 inches. Sin was missing the bulls eye mark. So applying this to today sin is missing the mark of perfection that God set for us. Grace is why we have hope for the future. We've been given this amazing gift because of what's been done for us.It gets all murked up by legalism and religion and human shortcomings and failures and misconceptions. It's actually really simple and summed up in 4 verses.Genesis 1:1 "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth."John 3:16-18 "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son"
Yes there's more to it but really in my mind when it comes to what I believe this is it. I believe that God created everything. I believe that there is a Father, Son and Holy Ghost and I believe that God loved us so much that he sent His Son so that we could have eternal life with Him.

Warning this one is long and kind of a rant

I trained at the new restaurant last night. It was interesting to be in a new restaurant, behind a new hostess stand. The hostesses I'll be working with are all several years younger then my current co-hosts and co-hostesses. It's a different crowd, different environment. It will be good for me and if it doesn't work then there are other opportunities I'm sure. The 2 hostesses I worked with last night I really did enjoy talking to. I came right in and started talking, started figuring out the table numbers. By half way through I was taking guests to tables. They use Open Table system so I require no training other than adjusting to the new flow of a new place.
Last month I mentioned I had virtually no pms type symptoms. I was happy and fine and breezed through it. This month, it's back, with a vengeance. I can hear a song, see something, hear a story, read something and it makes me tear up. I do not understand why, or really even how to control it. I do try and tamp down on the out of control feel, I do understand that I don't have to let it run all over me. I can talk myself out of the emotion, sometimes. I strongly dislike the out of control feeling.
I am glad that S and I broke up. Usually when I think about the situation I feel one of 2 things, anger or relief or both at the same time. I let my mom read his email to me and on our walk on Tuesday she mentioned that I shouldn't tell the next guy I don't date for fun. I put this back into context for her, I said that when he and I were having the discussion about church and what is important and when I said that I said it because I don't just date anyone. I need to know that we have similar values and beliefs. I didn't say that immediately I said it 4 months into the relationship. Looking back now when I was having second thoughts in December is when I should have broken up with him. But I had already paid for the 1/2 marathon and I think the plane ticket had already been purchased. I can keep looking back or I can move on. He really had no concept of who I am and I am so glad I broke up with him (finally) when I did. My regret is that I didn't do it sooner.
I've determined that I do have to stay single until after my birthday. I'm struggling with the whole "time" factor. Time moves so quickly. Another year has already passed. This time last year I was dating RS. As much of a mistake as that one was I do understand the reasons behind it. I was FREAKED out about turning 30. He did ask me to marry him on my birthday. Not in an actual proposal way but as in a you do want to do this kind of way. I don't understand him, I never will. Once that whole thing died I did everything possible to block him from my life. Of course I understand that this was the best. I also know that my parents were just waiting for it to end, they probably said a whole lot of prayers about that situation. I completely understand that it is better to be single then married to the wrong person. I understand that marriage is not the be all end all. I understand that you have to be happy and content with yourself before you can be happy and content with someone else.
I am trying to give myself time in order to deal with me. Honestly I hate it. I like to be in a relationship. The good relationship parts of hanging out and having fun together. I broke up with S exactly a month ago today. I've been processing and thinking and trying to get a handle on myself and be honest with myself. I realize that I'm lucky to be able to do whatever I want, whenever I want, and not have to answer to anyone but myself. I realize that when you're not in a good relationship it's miserable. I have come to understand that I'm not actually "old" despite how I've felt these past 3 years since breaking up with CF&G. I've thought a lot about the ones I've dated since then and the good and bad qualities that each of these guys had. I don't make lists. I don't really have a set idea of what is right or wrong. I can certainly say I don't want someone who uses drugs, has a criminal record or has been abusive in past relationships. I don't deal with lazy guys and I don't put up with liars. I work hard, he should too. I want someone who can make me laugh and laugh at myself. I want someone who isn't afraid to call me out when I'm doing something that gets on their nerves or they find to be pushy or manipulative. I want someone who has a backbone and opinions and will be very clear on what they think instead of hiding behind a mask of indifference or passiveness. The flip side of that is someone who is tolerant of others and recognizes that the world does not begin and end with their opinions. My family is so important to me and I need someone who believes that family is important and they have a healthy relationship with their own family. Or at least will have a good relationship with mine. While I have thoughts and opinions I'm not inflexible. I do compromise, I do understand how far off from perfect I am. I would like to find someone who compliments me, challenges me, and shares life and love and can fight but let it go and move on.

It's Friday, for this I am very thankful! Tonight and tomorrow are my last nights at the restaurant where I've worked for the past almost 2 years. It's bittersweet. I have loved the time I've spent there. If we weren't closing I wouldn't be leaving. New opportunities await and I know that it's good to push myself out of my comfort zone. I hope that everyone has a fabulous weekend!!

Days off = Overwhelmed

I had 2 fantastic days away from my desk. Yesterday afternoon I met up with Jess and crew and it was so much fun. Her kids, oh my word they are pretty, and she's not kidding you just want to eat Livie up, ahhh!!! Jess is just awesome and I'm glad we were able to catch up. Last night I was asleep by 9pm. This morning I arrived bright and early, and I have SO MUCH TO DO. I'm quickly posting because I needed to take a mental break. I've been here an hour and ten minutes and I've already done more work then what I normally stretch out for 2 hours... It's fine, I got it, I can do this! It's just I feel a little sick right now and I hate that feeling.
My devotion this morning was on patience. It's not the first one this week on that subject, think God is trying to relay something to me?
I train tonight at the new restaurant, I'm excited but terrified. For no good reason other than the change and being pushed out of my oh so comfortable comfort zone.
Resisting Perfection did a post this morning on remembering that what others think about us isn't as important as the focus we put on it. It was an awesome reminder!
Loves of Life did a post yesterday about how God has it, it was fabulous, another great reminder! If you read the post and you pray, say a prayer for her family members who are over in Africa, and the family members who will be joining them.

Now I've had my mental health minute and I'm diving back into work.

Wednesday Run

Last night I shared the bed with mom. OH MY WORD I am so tired!! Normally I can sleep through anything, however... It was hot and then I got cold. I woke up a few times. It was just not the greatest night, I should have just slept on the couch like I normally do. It's nice and cool and comfortable and I don't feel all shut up in a small room.

I was up at 6 planning to run but it was still a little too dark out so I took Jack out, checked email and the left for the run at 6:40. It was hot!!! I'm a little sore (again) from squats and lunges. I have to believe that they really are working. I got 4 miles in, they were not fast but I ran all of them. I dislike running in the heat, but I remind myself that I can. Yesterday Jess at 21 Days was talking about what motivates you. She's on a streak right now of running everyday AND she pushes a baby jogger. I thought about that this morning as I was reminding myself that I am blessed that I am able to go out and run. By the end of the run I looked like I had just gone and jumped in the lake but it was done and I felt good that I had completed it.

This afternoon I meet up with Jess (Dude & Sweetie), so excited and looking forward to it!!

Girlfriends In God Email

July 28, 2010

Masterpiece by the Bay

Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth
"You shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free" (John 8:32 NASB).

Friend To Friend
I grew up on the East Coast and was excited when my husband, son, and I decided to visit San Francisco for our vacation. My heart's desire and prayer for each day was that we would see God's handiwork, hear His voice, and be reminded of His greatness as we ventured out like three eager explorers to discover new aspects of His creation.

We traveled south along the shoreline and were amazed at the 200 foot regal cliffs that rose from the earth, pushing heavenward with waves splashing at their feet. Then we traveled north and drank in the beauty of acres and acres of vineyards on grassy rolling hills in the Napa Valley wine country. We hiked through the majestic Redwood Forestand stood under 1,000 year old, 260 foot giants, dwarfed by their towering branches.

But the most amazing sight was in a place calledAlcatraz. There in the middle of the San Francisco Bay, just a mile and a quarter from the sights and sounds of thebeautiful city, sits a rock island, known by some as the "Devil's Island of America." From 1934-1963, Alcatraz was a prison where the country's most corrupt, incorrigible criminals were housed. Al Capone and Machine Gun Kelly were just two of its more colorful residents.

There is no road to the prison, so we took a ferry across the bay. As we taxied up to "The Rock" and stared at the shell of concrete walls, barbed wire, and iron bars, an eerie feeling crept over my body. Each of us picked up headphones and a cassette recorder and toured the prison while listening to the taped voices of various prisoners recount their days behind bars. I walked into a cell called "the hole," closed my eyes, and tried to imagine what it would be like in solitary confinement with no light, no sound, and no other voice but my own. My heart was heavy as I thought about the souls that passed those halls, souls full of darkness, depression, and despair.

But as I rounded the final corner of the tour, I saw an amazing sight - a white haired, eighty-year-old grandfather, with crystal blue laughing eyes and a radiant smile that spread across his wrinkled face. A line formed as tourists stood waiting for him to sign his name and number on his autobiography, Alcatraz: from the Inside. This precious man before me was Jim Quillen, ex-prisoner #AZ586. He had spent ten years of his life, from 1942-1952, behind bars in this prison built to house the most dangerous criminals of his day. I looked in his eyes as we spoke. This was not the face of a dangerous man. What had happened to change his life?

I didn't have to flip many pages in his book to find the answer. In it he wrote, "It was only through the grace of ourLord Jesus Christ and His intercession, that my life of hopeless incarceration was averted. His help and forgiveness permitted me to obtain freedom, family, and a useful and productive place in society." I went back over to Mr. Quillen and sat by his side for a minute or so. We chatted a bit, and he autographed my copy of his book. Then God spoke to my heart, "On this vacation, you prayed that you would see My handiwork and be reminded of My greatness. This man is some of my best work."

On my trip to San Francisco, I was reminded of God's unchanging strength in the majestic rock cliffs of the shoreline and of His nurturing care as the Vinedresser in the hills of the wine country. I saw a picture of God's protective canopy over His children in the towering Redwoods of the forests. But when I looked into Jim Quillen's eyes, I saw God's most incredible masterpiece: a changed life.

Let's Pray
Dear Heavenly Father, thank You for setting me free! You took my pain and turned it into purpose. You took my hurt and turned it into hope. You took my fear and turned it into faith. Thank you, O Lord, for setting my feet to dancing and my voice to singing Your praise!

In Jesus' Name,
Amen.

Ten on Tuesday

Lisa posted this and I liked it so much I told her I was going to borrow it again (not the first time I've done this) :) I'm currently sitting watching Cheaper by the Dozen with Mom and Grandmom so I'm catching up on computer time as well.

1. How do you take your coffee on an average day? How do you like your coffee if you’re splurging?
On an average day I drink at least 16 if not 32 oz of coffee ( I track calories this is how I know this) I keep it to 1 tbsp of creamer per cup. If I splurge I add a little more cream. I know the calorie bombs that are starbucks drinks so I try to keep these to about once a month if that.

2. What is your genre of books to read?
I love Karen Kingsbury!!! I also love Norah Roberts!!! I read a lot of fiction!

3. Where do you want to retire, if you could go anywhere?
I'd love to be able to have various places in order to have the best of all worlds.

4. The 17-year-old you is told to write a 10-minute speech. What topic would you have picked?
At 17 I talked a lot about Children of the American Revolution. I probably would have talked about the need for recognizing and acknowledging history and what it teaches us, if we don't learn from our past mistakes we are destined to repeat them.

5. What word describes you best?
Busy

6. What is the next “event” that you are looking forward to? (ex.: vacation, moving, date, job change, etc)
I'm really looking forward to my 1/2 marathon in ATL in October

7. Do you like to discuss controversial topics or do you prefer to avoid those types of conversations?
I'm stealing Lisa's answer verbatim because I completely agree "It depends on who I am with. In general, I would say I prefer to avoid controversial topics because those debates usually make me uncomfortable. But there are certain people that I can talk to about controversial topics and the debate is respectful and enjoyable."

8. Would you rather add 4 free hours to each day, or add 1 extra day to the week?
An extra day

9. If you created a sports team; what would your colors and mascot be?
I'm going to take the easy route, I love the mountaineer and I love apps colors, BLACK AND GOLD!!!!

10. If you had to be a teacher, what subject would you teach?
history or creative writing

Work out, Mini Vacation, Old friends

I had today and I have tomorrow off from both jobs. Traditionally this would be the week that my Grandparents and then my Grandmom have rented a house for a week at Topsail Island, NC. This year my Grandmother decided that instead of the beach she would like to spend a week down at our lake house.

Last night I was able to fit in a run and strength training. Lunges, Squats, arms, etc. Followed by a decent 4 mile run. After the disappointing run on Saturday I was glad to be able to get a better 4 miles in last night. I packed and was ready to leave early this morning.

Bright and early (7) I left my house to travel down. Mom was at the gate when I arrived and she was getting ready for her walk. She waited while I changed clothes and we went on a walk with Jack Banner. After the walk we had a nice dip in the lake followed by breakfast. My friend MFT was coming up around lunch and bringing my nephew. She arrived and Mom and Grandmommy met W for the first time. They LOVE him! He's such a little doll and we had so much fun talking and catching up. Jack Banner was super jealous of W, we had to keep him on a leash pretty much the whole time.

MFT and I have been friends for 23 years, we realized that today at lunch. We met when we were 7 years old. I have felt so blessed today to realize the friendships I have, the Mom and Grandmother (and family) that I have. I often times become so focused on what I don't have or what's not right that I forget about the blessing that I do have!

Night out, Amazing Food, Changes

My last post I said we were enjoying pina coladas and a night in. Well then Miss K gets a text from her friend Miss V and says, we've been invited to just go hang out with Miss V at a friend's house. It wasn't too far away and I figured why not? We both knew we had no money, at all, to spend but hanging out at a house would be fine. We arrived, and a card game was going on. There was a girl at the house who I actually graduated from college with. Charlotte can be so incredibly small!
I did not wear shoes that were great for walking. I did not realize how much walking I would be doing on Saturday night and I am paying for that today!! At some point it was suggested that we go to Thomas St Tavern. So we go, and it was fun. Then we decided to wander over to Whiskey Warehouse, which is behind Thomas St. It was a night that didn't end until 2 in the morning. We cabbed it home. I had sworn up and down that I wasn't going to go out this weekend. The only money I spent was on the cab, so in that regard I am pleased that I didn't overspend. I have to admit I had fun and while we had fun I definitely plan to stay in next weekend!
Sunday I had my restaurant party. Our general manager hosts an employee appreciation party and makes the most incredible food I've ever tasted! Everything was homemade. We had brisket, mac and cheese, potato salad, slaw, salsas, red beans and rice, tomatoes, and fruit salad. Seriously it was all so amazing!!! After all that food I came home and took Jack for a walk. It was hot but I needed to stretch my legs!
I've gone out every weekend for the past 3 weeks. I have had fun and I have no regrets. I am tired though! I think maybe because of all the changes that are happening I feel overwhelmed. I broke up with S, which this was a good thing. I was so frustrated and irritated all the time. His honesty after I broke up with him allowed me the freedom of knowing that I absolutely did the right thing. My restaurant job is ending because they are closing. I've loved this job, I would have been there 2 years in September. I'm so incredibly thankful to have a new restaurant hostessing gig lined up. At the same time I feel uncertainty and insecurity. I have to go into a new place, I have to learn a new restaurant flow, I have to step outside of my comfort zone yet again. Will they work with my schedule, will I feel as comfortable, all the unknown and what if terrify me sometimes. Other times I'm just fine. I do believe that it will be a great restaurant to work at and I'm looking forward to the change. I'm turning 31 in just a few weeks. Lisa sent me a GREAT article about how women are considered most attractive at 31. I appreciated this! I honestly am trying to not let it get to me. I have specifically decided not to date until after my birthday. Otherwise I would be putting ridiculous pressure on myself and I don't need to do that. I would rather be single then in the wrong relationship. I do have to let go of a lot of things and that is very hard for me to do!
I have 2 days off tomorrow and Wednesday. The plan is to go down to the lake house to spend time with my Mom and Grandmother. MFT is bringing W up to meet my Mom and Grandmother for the first time (yes he's going to be 2 in November and they are just now meeting him). It hadn't worked out for a visit before. I'm excited to see her and W. MFT is one of my oldest friends and I refer to W as my nephew but there is no blood relation. Then after I leave Wednesday I go meet up with Jess, so excited about this visit!!
I'm hoping I can get a run in tonight and a run in on Wednesday and then I need to do 9 miles on Saturday. This past Saturday's race was so miserable!!! I have to let go of the bad memories of it and hope that next Saturday will be a beautiful effortless run!! I really need to figure out how to set up my ipod so that I have music to run with. This no music thing is absolutely getting to me! I've run for so long without it but I know that if I would actually make myself figure it out I would have such a better time running!

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19

4 Miler Disappointment

Last night I worked. I was supposed to close but my sweet co-hostess agreed to close for me. I may or may not have promised to bring BoJangles to her today while she worked the day shift... I woke up this morning at 4:45 because Jack Banner needed to go out. Then I woke up again in order to get ready. I was out the door by 6:40. I was at the race by 6:55. I met up with my friend KCH to run this 4 mile race. I don't remember last year being quite so hot or quite so hilly. When I took Jack out at 4:45 it was 80 degrees. By the time the race started at 7:30 it was STILL 80 degrees. Ridiculously hot and humid!!! I started off too fast so I cramped. It was uphill to start. My first mile I was at 9:40ish, I think... Overall my time 10.04 minute mile, awful!!! I ran the same race last year at a 9:48 overall pace, ugghhh it totally made me mad at myself today.
I came home cleaned the bathroom did some laundry and then decided I needed to go to the pool to try and help my pasty white casper self. I had an appointment at the new restaurant at 2 to go in and talk to them about scheduling. I think I'm really going to love the new restaurant. It's traditional Italian but the atmosphere of the restaurant feels very Miami. I'm excited it's closer to uptown and there is more of a mix of people. I've determined my last day at the old restaurant will be Saturday. I'm only giving a week notice but they are only open 3 more weeks I think they can handle life without me.

Tonight Miss K and I are hanging out. Currently The Holiday is on and we're enjoying Pina Coladas!!

Shoes

I LOVE shoes in case that's not obvious already :) This first pair is Guess found on www.heels.com.



This next pair is Guess also on www.heels.com. I love the purple color!! Now I just need a dress like Heather's from Thursday and I would be set!!

This black pair is Guess from www.zappos.com.

As much as I love heels I wear flats often, to save my knees!! This pair is SO cute, they're Guess found on www.zappos.com

This last pair I love because they are pink and white. They are Guess found at www.zappos.com

Overstock

It's Friday, I just had a free lunch provided by the office. I'm sleepy!! In order to wake myself up I tried to do a little free shopping. Overstock has some cute dresses right now!! All pictures are from Overstock.com

Thursday Run

Yesterday was one of those days at work where I kept hoping for a new post to pop up in my reader. I was soooo trying to keep myself busy. After work I knew I had to get my run/workout in a little earlier than usual because I had plans with my friend KH. She was working at the restaurant and wanted to grab a drink afterwards. I had suggested she just come by my house and she agreed so I knew she would be arriving around 8:30 and I needed to be home and showered before then.
I got to the gym around 7, it's usually still crowded around that time but last night I sucked it up and prepared to deal with it. Fortunately (I guess since it was a Thursday night and we have all the summer outdoor concerts) it wasn't that busy. I was able to get strength training in for my arms. I decided not to do legs since I have my 4miler on Saturday and I would like to have a good run. Then I did 3 miles on the treadmill. This time I started off slow and worked my way up and finished at (for me) an excellent pace. I was running around an 8:10 minute mile. Of course that was only for about 2 minutes. I progressively bumped up my pace starting at a 10:30 minute mile, then 10, then 9:40 and then at about 15 minutes I started moving it up a notch every so often. I love the treadmill for pushing harder because I don't have a watch and when I run outside I don't have a way to gauge time. Plus at 7 it's still pretty hot so even in the air conditioning I was OH SO disgusting!!!
I arrived home, showered, sat and talked to Miss K. KH arrived and we talked and caught up with each other. It was great conversation catching up on what has been going on. She didn't leave til after 10 so this morning I was definitely dragging when the alarm went off at 5:40. I close tonight at the restaurant, hopefully it won't be too late! Last week I was actually out before 11 I'm hoping for a repeat of that tonight!

Realization

It's interesting the things you realize about yourself. I've talked about the blessing of having friends who are very honest, sometimes excruciatingly so. When I got that email from S I forwarded it and my response to PYS. I honestly tried to not bug her as often because she has way too much going on and I didn't want to be obnoxious. I also knew that once she read the email she would tell me her honest thoughts. She did. She gave me points to reflect on. I actually wrote my response that I would never send based off the conversation I had with her. I addressed all the points that she mentioned as well as responding to his comments.
I tend to gloss over, or not take full responsibility for my own actions. I don't like to admit that I may have some contribution to what was wrong. However, I have to face up to my own contributions, responsibilities and shortcomings in order to move forward.
I had a conversation with my friend MG. We were going back and forth and she was pointing out that I do need to take time to focus on me. I tend to jump from one relationship to another. And even when I'm not "dating" someone there is usually someone on the fringes. Part of this is because I take breaks from dating when I feel like it and then I get bored and someone else comes along, or I get bored and sign up for online dating in order to distract myself. She pointed out that by signing up for the online dating as a distraction indicates that I'm not comfortable with myself. She pointed out that the list of names from February 09 to now is nuts. Now really I had to defend myself on that one. Simply because yes it was a list but some lasted longer than others and actually there were more but I didn't mention those. And having just written that I think I just saw her point. I think PYS has tried to make this point before too.
It's hard for me to take a step back and objectively look; especially when I have taken a break when I do feel necessary. I focus on numbers, be that my age, the scale, my dress size, my checking account balance, etc. When numbers are good I'm happy, when numbers are not I'm stressed or aggravated. Right now I'm happy, content, and thankful. I spent so many months frustrated and irritated and trying to analyze what was going on with S. Now that it's just me I get to hang out with my roommate. Call up friends and do things with them. I can train for my next 1/2 marathon that I'm doing all on my own. I run so much better in the morning rather than any other time of day and I do not have to compromise and make adjustments for someone else who runs better later in the day. I have a new job and I don't have to worry about scheduling and how it's going to effect quality time. That is such a headache and while when I'm in a good situation I don't mind having to do this for right now, it's SO nice to NOT have to think about it! I don't have to talk on the phone every night. I'm NOT a fan of the phone, I talk all day long at work and if I work at the restaurant I have to talk to people constantly and be nice. If I have something to say to you I will sometimes call, I will sometimes text, and I will email. I love face to face conversations when possible. I guess it's a bad sign when you haven't dated someone a year and you really don't want to talk to them on the phone and you start to tune them out after the first couple sentences and check email… and look for ways to exit the conversation as quickly as possible. MG pointed out that even if I had gotten married in my 20's it would have been to the wrong person. Which I know this and I remind myself of this. I realized that I’ve believed myself to be old ever since CF and I broke up. It was so hard to be a part of a little girls life (yet not) and every weekend or every other weekend the world revolved around her and then suddenly I was not a part of that anymore. I felt old, I was suddenly supposed to shift gears and be young and unattached and single again and all I really wanted was to have that back again, minus psycho ex. Driving home from the restauarant a few Friday nights ago while I was still with S I thought about the summer of 2002. It was around 10 and I was thinking how used to be I would be dashing home to change clothes to go out again and instead I was on my way home to go to bed. I remember feeling so old. Except I’m not, yes I work a lot and yes I’m tired and I do have to remember to take time to rest so I stay healthy but going home to just watch movies or go to bed but a lot of this also has to do with the fact that not everyone is fun to go out with. The difference between MG and other girlfriends is that going out with MG is like going out with the life of the party. Even when it was just the 2 of us going someplace it never felt awkward or uncomfortable. I loved going out with MG because she is fun, and easy, and not a drama queen. I realized something last Saturday night, Miss K while in a different way, is also fun to go out with. Even when it’s just the 2 of us it doesn’t feel awkward or weird. It’s like being with the life of the party again, except different because she’s not MG but hopefully I made the point. As outgoing as I can be I can also feel overwhelmed when in large group situations. I fight the shy overwhelmed feeling and most times once I’m there I am just fine but even before MG's pirate b’day party I felt slightly anxious. I was excited and I knew I would be fine but it’s intimidating to be out surrounded by strangers. Of course give me a few drinks and I’m fine :)

Restaurant, Mosquitos, Almost Friday

I did the squats/lunges/adductor/abductor on Tuesday, today, not nearly as sore as last week. I was in SO much pain last Thursday but this week I'm ok. So I will do these again tonight, or some variation. I plan for 3 miles, I want to save my legs for Saturday's run. I'm closing at the restaurant again tomorrow night so I know my legs are going to be tired from standing.
Last night at the restaurant we were busy. I had a lady come in for a dinner being held in one of our private dining rooms. She informs me that she knows where it's at and will be going to the ladies room before going back. My Co-hostess told me she found her wandering trying to find her party. A few hours later I had another woman come in and loftily inform me that she would find them no need for me to help her. My job, as the person standing there at the door is actually not to surf the internet and play on facebook all night long. I really am there to pleasantly greet you and assist you to find your party. It is not a bother, it is not an inconvenience, it is my JOB. You walking around looking for your party makes you look dumb but if you don't want or need my assistance then I'm not going to be rude about it. It would be one thing if the restaurant was small and intimate but it's not and it helps to have someone assisting you.
Mosquitoes, oh my word!!!! I don't know why but suddenly I can't walk out the door to take Jack out without being attacked. I'm not sure what they've done or have not done that has suddenly caused so many to be around. I hope that they go away again soon!!! I'm thankful that Jack is on heartworm medication as bad as they have become around my house! I've been extremely careful this summer about making sure that he gets his medicine on the exact day!
This week has flown by I'm having trouble believing that tomorrow is Friday. Although I did wake up and had to stop and ask myself what day is today??

workouts, frb, roommate and jack

I got my workout in last night. I started off with strength training, arms, squats, lunges, adductor, abductor. Hopefully on Thursday I'm not in as much pain as I was last week. I then went to run. I planned for 4 miles. I made the mistake of starting off way too fast. I ate before I went to the gym and usually I can get away with this if I time it right, do the strength training and then slowly start the run and work my way up. Well last night I was kind of tired and just wanted to get moving so I started off and pretty much immediately got a cramp. I couldn't shake that cramp for the rest of the time. I had to slow it down and speed it up and I wasn't thrilled with the outcome but I did 3 miles total. Hopefully my Thursday run goes better!! For my Thursday run I'm thinking I need to keep it to 3 miles again because I have a 4Miler race on Saturday. I would like to have a good time for it but I think that's really going to depend on the weather and how hot it already is at 7:30.
For those new to my blog I sometimes refer to FRB, former running buddy. Back story, she and I were friends in college and then we ran into each other again her in Charlotte. She is actually the reason I got my foot in the door for an interview with this current job. When I started dating S she felt that I "replaced" her by running with him and choosing to do the 1/2 marathon with him. After I took her out for her birthday and paid for dinner she said she needed to apologize and then went into this whole monologue of how I had replaced her with him and that I was a bad friend and blah blah blah. I actually had tried to keep up our once weekly run time that we'd had and had been able to do that til she got sick and we were right at the holidays. It was very unpleasant and I just gave her space. Then as time as gone on it's just not improved. To the point where all of our office knows that we used to be friends and now we're no longer really on speaking terms, awkward!!! I get so annoyed with her attitude. I smile, I'm nice, I'm friendly, I'm pleasant. I try to consistently keep my negative thoughts to myself. I have one coworker who knows the situation and sees what's going on and it's nice to have someone who sees and knows how ridiculous it all is!! She's going to Hawaii on Thursday and will be out Friday and all next week, this makes me SO HAPPY!!!! I keep her posted schedule, she is in sales, so the positive to this is the fact that she's out of the office often. All our sales execs send out their schedules weekly so I always know when she'll be in the office and out and it helps me mentally prepare. I try to get along with everyone all the time, it's rare for me to have a situation like this. Especially now that S and I are broken up I just find her attitude all that much more offensive. Oh well Ce La Vie.

In other news I work tonight and we should be busy. When I left on Monday night we had 112 in the book for tonight. I've not yet heard back from the new manager regarding paperwork so I plan to call her this afternoon. Jack Banner is officially in his own little heaven. Having Miss K take him for walks and love on him. He will often choose to sit with her rather than me when we're hanging out in the living room. It's kind of weird for me but I really love that he has someone to spoil him in addition to me. The few weeks where I was working so much and he was on his own all the time, I felt SO guilty!! Hope everyone has a wonderful Wednesday!!

My all over the place music taste

I listen to so many different radio stations; my taste in music is all over the place. There are a few songs on the radio right now that I listen to and they talk about love except different kinds. Lee Bryce, "Love Like Crazy". This song is about a couple who marry at 17 and everyone tells them that they're crazy. One of my favorite lines in the song is "never let your praying knees get lazy and love like crazy". Then there is a song by Bucky Covington, which when I found out who the artist was who sang the song I still liked the song, I'm not exactly a fan of his BUT this song, oh this song gets me every single time. I think because it so perfectly describes my Grandaddy. I'm tearing up thinking about the song. He sings about his Dad and how he never said I love you but would always check the air in his tires and the spark plug wires and ask when is the last time you had this oil changed and to call his mom sometime as he was leaving. How when he came to see the new house he grabbed his tool belt. How when he went to hug him at his 65th birthday he knew he would stiffen up but he hugged him anyways. Ahh it gets me!!
I've been a long time country music fan. One of my all time favorite country songs is Randy Travis "Forever and Ever Amen" I appreciate the words. I think where as Hollywood make love seem like a fairy tale, songs actually make love and life real. They talk about the hardships and struggles and they talk about overcoming the hardships and struggles.
The current Eminem song featuring Rhiana, oh my word is that song edgy. I looked up the lyrics yesterday and the intensity of that one is a little unnerving to me. I do like the song and I do think they do a great job together on it. But talk about 2 people who may just be toxic for one another, that would be the characters in that song. When you're in those toxic relationships it's hard because you love that person so much but they are just going to destroy you if you don't get away from them!

This morning one of my favorite songs came on the radio at the house. Rich Mullins, "Hold me Jesus"

Well, sometimes my life Just don't make sense at all When the mountains look so big And my faith just seems so small
CHORUS: So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf You have been King of my glory Won't You be my Prince of Peace
And I wake up in the night and feel the dark It's so hot inside my soul I swear there must be blisters on my heart
CHORUS
Surrender don't come natural to me I'd rather fight You for something I don't really want Than to take what You give that I need And I've beat my head against so many walls Now I'm falling down, I'm falling on my knees
And this Salvation Army band Is playing this hymn And Your grace rings out so deep It makes my resistance seem so thin
CHORUS
You have been King of my glory Won't You be my Prince of Peace

Yes I have just mentioned an Eminem song and Rich Mullins song in the same post. All the songs that I've mentioned have an effect on me when I hear them. The Rich Mullins song is one of my favorites, it was released in 1993, and yet it's as applicable today as then. I know that I often times fight for what I want and my way when if I would just surrender it up then I'm able to accept what he really has for me.

Girls Night Pictures

Heres the picture from our first Girl's night 7/9/10.


Out at Mez 7/17/10. I'm not a fan of this picture, I was distracted and forgot to fix my arm and it looks fat but the picture is still cute enough to post. I'm also not sure why I was bending my knees other than the fact that VB is petite and I was trying to make it easier to take the picture. Oh well, we had a fabulous time!

Out on the town

I hope that everyone had a wonderful weekend! My last post I was about to get ready for another fun night out on the town. I found a fabulous pair of shoes at Marshalls. I had wavered between the black pair (more practical) or the gold pair (more fun) and after texting MG and Miss K I decided to go with the fun gold pair that were on clearance.



We had to meet up with an acquaintance of Miss K to pick up our tickets for the evening. I decided I was in the mood for Pina Colada's (I ran 8 miles on Saturday I figured I wouldn't sweat those calories) so I picked up the necessary ingredients and we relaxed and talked while enjoying the frosty beverages. I decided on a brown dress that I have had forever. It was fun and cool and went perfectly with the new shoes and a necklace that I've had forever but don't wear very often. We took a cab uptown and started off at Cosmos. It was laid back and we sat talking and laughing. Until the 2 creepy guys approached us, actually just one was creepy. They both had to have been in their 40's and the line they used was we couldn't not come talk to the 2 most beautiful women in the bar. Ok, seriously, we were the only 2 there at that point. It was still fairly early (9:30) so things were just starting to pick up. The one guy was a pilot and he and Miss K were talking about Vegas while I got stuck with the creepy one who made my skin crawl. Fortunately by the time they came over it was time for us to move on to our final destination for the evening. Mez was hosting Ryan Cabreras birthday party and they had a DJ and we had free tickets. As the night began Miss K said she would meet him and have her picture taken with him. I knew she would, I had no doubt. We arrived at the door at Mez, they had the red carpet and velvet ropes and we provided our tickets to the bouncers. As we made our way inside and upstairs we decided to do a quick hair check, as we were coming out of the ladies lounge, we passed by a group, it registered with us both that the group we just passed was actually the birthday boy and his entourage. Now he's not even a B list star and he's better known for who he has dated but it's one of those things were it was a fun night and the music was easy to dance to. Miss K and I went to the bar and talked and people watched, there were so many pretty people out that night!! The one thing I will say, bachelorette parties are the most annoying groups EVER!!! There were 2 or 3 there that night. Now I understand that you have a right to go out celebrating with your girlfriends and I get that it's a big deal and you want to have fun HOWEVER, really, you must wear the tiara and light up veil and tackiness? I have participated in bachelorette parties because as a friend that is what you do. I told Miss K if I ever get married I'm not having a party, I don't want one, never have. If I thought I could actually get out of the wedding itself I would but my Mom would come back and haunt me so that's not an option, and since this is all a void point right now I'll move on. I don’t know if it was just those particular groups that night or I was just more aware that night but they definitely were obnoxious! As the night went on the music continued and when my friend VB arrived we went out on the dance floor. I danced in my sky high heels and had the best time! Sure enough Miss K made it up on stage and has several pictures with the B'day boy. We stayed until 1ish and then it was time to call it a night. VB volunteered to be our DD and drove us home.
Sunday morning I had nursery duty at church. I was in there with my Mom and a lady I used to babysit for and we had the best time talking and also the kids were super cute and everyone had a good, uneventful time so it was a success. After church I swung by the house to pick up Miss K and Jack and we drove down to the lake to hang out and have dinner with my parents.

Girlfriends in God July 19, 2010

It was a Dark and Stormy Night
Sharon Jaynes

Today's Truth"For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal" (2 Corinthians 4:17-18 NIV).

Friend to Friend Up at 4:30 AM, I was preparing to speak at a Good Friday prayer breakfast in Oil City, PA. At the event, the Holy Spirit showed up, God moved, and we had a great beginning to a wonderful weekend celebrating Christ's resurrection.
After the event, it was off to the Philadelphia airport for a quick 1 ½ hour flight home. Easter weekend had the airport teeming with travelers. As we waited, clouds began to roll in and planes failed to roll out. Unfortunately, overbooked airplanes and stormy weather do not a good combination make. Delays and cancelations lit up the departure board.
I was scheduled to arrive in Charlotte, NC at 7:00 PM. But then my arrival time was pushed back to 7:40, then to 8:40, then to 9:30. This was turning out to be not such a "good Friday" after all. The travelers were getting angry, the ticketing agents were getting agitated, and kids were getting antsy. I just wanted to go home.
Finally, after many gate changes and time delays, we boarded the plane headed for Charlotte. As we neared North Carolina, the pilot made an announcement.
"Hello, this is Captain Bernard. Unfortunately, the storm is passing through Charlotte, NC at this time and we will not be able to land. We are going to land in Greensboro, NC, 90 miles away, and wait it out. Feel free to disembark the airplane, but do not leave the boarding area. We will make an announcement when it is time to re-board. Don't worry. We'll get you to Charlotte just as quickly as possible. Sorry for the inconvenience. "
Arg! We landed in Greensboro and waited ... and waited ... and waited. About 10:30, there was another announcement. "May I have your attention please? For those travelling on flight 389 to Charlotte, unfortunately, the flight crew has logged in too many hours and they will not be able to continue the flight to Charlotte. We have secured vans to drive you the rest of the way. Sorry for the inconvenience."
A collective moan rose from the motley bunch. We trudged down to baggage claim, retrieved our bags, and separated into groups of nine.
"What do you do?" a man in a business suit asked, trying to pass the time.
"I'd rather not say," I answered. Thinking he might get the wrong idea, I smiled and said, "Just kidding. I'm an author."
"What do you write?"
I was hoping he wouldn't ask me that question. I was not being a very good advertisement. "I write Christian oriented books for women," I answered. "You know - the kind that tells women how to handle difficulties in life." We all started laughing.
We piled into the van: eight traveling to visit family, one going home. The air conditioner was broken, and heat blew out of the vents in every direction. No one could figure out how to shut it down. Temperatures rose, sweat poured, layers came off, the widows fogged up. It was miserable.
After about an hour and a-half, I started to relax, thinking we would be in Charlotte at any minute. In the seat in front of me, a twenty-something woman and her mother chatted happily. They were on their way to spend the weekend with daughter number two. Daughter number one, who was apparently tracking our progress on her I-phone, turned around in her seat to face me.
"We're passing Statesville," she said. "How much further do we have?"
"Statesville!" I cried. "We're not supposed to be passing Statesville! He's going the wrong way!"
Our one and a-half hour van ride turned into a three hour van ride. This was just the icing on a very bad cake. I had way too much material for a new book on suffering and was ready for this not-so-good Friday to be over. Just as I was having a not-so-nice, one-way conversation with God, the mother in front of me drew a smiley face on the window. A smiley face!
What in the world does she have to be happy about! I mused. I don't see anything "smiley" about this entire situation!
We finally arrived in Charlotte sometime after midnight. The 1 ½ hour trip had turned into an eight-hour nightmare. Nine dripping wet, exhausted passengers climbed out of the van and breathed in the fresh night air.
"Bye, Beth," I said to the young I-pod toting girl. "You have fun with you sister and mom this weekend."
"Oh, we will," she replied. "My mom just found out that she has cancer for the second time. It doesn't look too good. We're going to spend a weekend together, just the three of us, simply enjoying each other."
She turned to walk away ... never seeing the tears that filled my eyes.
I looked back at the van's window which still held the picture of a smiley face drawn by a dying woman's hand. Suddenly, my night of little inconveniences seemed rather petty. It was a Good Friday after all. God had reminded me of all I had to be thankful for. Storms will come in this life. It is our perspective in the storm that will determine whether we will grumble and complain, or draw a smiley face and thank God for each and every breath we have.
I slipped into the car with my precious, patient husband, gave him a quick kiss, and drew a smiley face on the window.

Let's Pray
Dear LORD, forgive me when I whine over life's inconveniences. In the storms of life, help me see Your blessings in the raindrops, Your power in the lightening, and Your voice in the rolling thunder.In Jesus' Name,Amen. :-)
Now It's Your TurnI have two passages I want you to read today. The first is 2 Corinthians 4:17-18. What do you think Paul meant by his light and momentary afflictions?
Now read 2 Corinthians 11:23-28. Now, what do you think Paul meant by light and momentary afflictions? This is not what I'd call light affliction, but in view of the glory that we will experience in heaven, Paul thought the struggles of this world were well worth it.
In light of what you are going through today, I'd love to hear if this devotion stirred your heart to think differently. Let's chat. Visit www.sharonjaynes.com/blog or www.facebook.com/sharonjaynes.

Saturday Run

Last night was the first night of Charlotte Restaurant week. It went very smoothly! I had to close so I was there until 10:30 and home before 11. For this I was thankful. The restaurant closes at 11 and I thought I would have to stay til then. Fortunately they sent me home once the restaurant was almost clear.

This morning at 10 til 7 I was out the door. I ran out of my neighborhood up to Providence then I turned down Fairview to Colony to Sharon and back to my neighborhood. It was a beautiful morning, the end of the run was ROUGH. I was super slow and it was definitely more difficult towards the very last part. I came home and I looked like someone had dumped buckets of water over me. After my MUCH needed cool shower I was able to get quite a bit done. I cleaned the bathroom, returned some stuff to Target, hit up Kohls. So at Kohls is when I realized I'm officially getting "old". I was looking for a cute outfit, or accessory, or what I really needed was cute wedge shoes. I ended up finding the perfect pair of black flats that I've been searching for for MONTHS!! I work on a concrete floor and I have not really had the right shoes for a while now. I found them today, and on sale! Then I was browsing clothing and found 2 cute clearance tops and a clearance sweater, yet again, work stuff. I do have to say that I tried on some cute stuff but nothing really worked for tonight. After making those purchases I hit up Petco and purchased 2 toys for Jack, both of which have already been destroyed. I'm less than thrilled. Any suggestions for durable pet toys? I decided to try the Marshalls near my house for shoes for tonight, SCORE!!! I got a fabulous pair of Guess shoes on clearance!! Pictures will follow on Monday.

Tonight, girls night with Miss K and my friend/coworker VB. Updates to come! Hoping that everyone is having a fabulous weekend!!

Run Recap New Roommate New Job Thankful

Last night I needed to get a run in. I was still hurting from the lunges/squats/etc from Tuesday night so I decided to see how I felt once running to determine how long I would go. It was a painful slow run and I got 2.68 in for my run. I wore a pair of Nike running shorts that felt extremely short. I looked in the mirror and they were short but not as short as they felt once I started running. Hopefully I'll get used to them and they won't feel so weird to me. I definitely liked the material because it didn't get so heavy when wet like the cotton shorts do! After my run I swung by the house and did a fast change and left again with Miss K and Jack. Realizing how sore my legs were I knew that walking would help more than running. We walked 1.74 miles. This helped stretch out my poor sore abused legs :)
I prayed and prayed for my roommate. I kept saying that I knew that God had just the right roommate for me. I was frustrated and stressed when by June 1 no one had moved in. What I kept saying was true He already had just the right girl. I saw her information June 30, shot her an email, she emailed back, we talked, pictures were sent and she arrived in Charlotte 7/4. I shouldn't be so amazed at how great of a roommate she is but I am thankful. Thankful that God did in fact in His time bring the right roommate. My morning devotional emails were regarding timing, and His perfect plan… I couldn't go out and force someone to move in, this was definitely not something I could control as much as I wanted to! Interestingly enough I think Miss K needs someone to talk to about everything going on with her life as much as I needed a good roommate!
Driving to work this morning I realized how truly happy and content I feel. God provided this new hostessing job. My restaurant that I have LOVED working at for almost 2 years will be closing. I knew that I was going to have to find another part time gig. I received a forwarded email from one of the hostesses that I work with. One of the former managers from my restaurant is now a manager at a place not far from my house. She told JM that she needed a hostess and asked if she knew anyone since she knew the restaurant is closing. I responded to the email and initially K told me that they needed someone 5 nights a week. I felt discouraged. I only work 2-3 nights a week and that is plenty, any more and I would burn out. I called her back on Wednesday night and we talked. I explained that I was only really interested in 2-3 and might not be right for what she's looking for. She told me she would look at the schedule and for me to call her back. I called back yesterday and she and I talked and she said that they really only need someone for 2-3 nights. I emailed her my dates that I will need for October and then after Charlotte's restaurant week I will go in and fill out paperwork. I'll be juggling the 2 restaurants briefly but I've done this before and I know I can do it again since it's only temporary. This restaurant will be a faster pace then my current restaurant but faster pace means the time goes by faster! I know I can handle it and I'm looking forward to meeting new people! Restaurant hostessing is great for meeting fun new friends!!
I have so much to be thankful for!

Kelly's Korner Today

Ladies if you are single over at Kelly's Korner she's doing her version of Match and Eharmony. I think this is so fun!! I've been looking through the eligible guys from all over the US and there are definitely some hotties!! I think it's such a great idea and I linked to it because you just never know what might happen. I'm leaving comments when I can (I've talked about how sometimes at work I can't always leave comments) because it's fun to tell the blogger just how good looking their guy is that they are posting about.
Here's a little about me :) There's a picture at the bottom of this post. I'm 30, almost 31 Charlotte girl. I'm 5'8 1/2 and I love to wear heels but with running I tend not to wear them as often. I graduated from Appalachian State with a degree in Communications/Public Relations and I fell into commercial insurance and I've been working in this field since 2003. I started on the carrier side, went to the agency side for a few years, and now I'm back on the carrier side of things. I also work part time as a restaurant hostess. For my regular readers the exciting thing about the hostessing I have a new gig lined up for when my restaurant closes on 8/21! God definitely always provides.
I love to go out and have fun. I run, I have my next 13.1 race on 10/3 in Atlanta. I still go to the same church I grew up in. I love it and it took me a long time to come back but it's where I know I'm supposed to be right now. I enjoy reading and good movies. I love to bake and will often bring cookies or brownies to work. I perfected my chocolate chip cookie recipe a long time ago but I still play around with it. I have a younger brother who just got married May 1, 2010 and I LOVE my new sister, she is just absolutely amazing and beautfiul and they are a wonderful match for each other.
If you have more questions for me I'm happy to answer :) Happy Friday to all!!!

Gold Digger

I read People.com, it's a guilty pleasure and I can access it at work so I check throughout the day for the headlines that I have on my IGoogle. I noticed that one of the headlines was regarding Mel Gibson calling Oksana a gold digger in tape 5. I have no idea what happened and I have not really been following this story or listening to the tapes. For me this is one train wreck that I can absolutely not watch. But that headline really did catch my eye.
There are certainly women who are gold diggers. I see them on a fairly regular basis in the restaurant where I work. It's evidenced by their much younger age to the older man that they are with, the ridiculous amount of expensive jewelry, clothing, shoes and handbag and their attitude towards him. Naturally I don't know what goes on behind closed doors and perhaps on some of these I'm making a snap judgment and I'm completely wrong.
Having qualified this by saying that I have not followed this story the term gold digger is ugly to me. Perhaps because I've been called this and this last time it was insinuated that I was. Who knows what went on in their personal life but it seems to me that when the guy is calling her a gold digger it's expressly to hurt her feelings and perhaps it's not true at all. She had her own career before him and perhaps she might have felt the relationship would help further her career but using a relationship to help further your career is not being a gold digger. I Googled the definition
"gold miner: a miner who digs or pans for gold in a gold field a woman who associates with or marries a rich man in order to get valuables from him through gifts or a divorce settlement" wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn
Maybe I'm a little extra sensitive on this topic. What woman does not want to have a guy do nice things for her? When I was seeing M2, the Charleston Nightmare, I was working my usual 2 jobs. He specifically said he wanted to take me away for a nice weekend at the beach. So I made the necessary requests off in order for us to be able to go. In my mind we were going to go, have fun, get to know each other the way you can when you travel with someone. Little did I know it would turn into such an awful experience. I have always been sensitive to the fact that once you've gone on a few dates you should start offering to pay every once in a while or at least offer to make dinner. I can absolutely take care of myself but I think the guy needs to (within his budget) make an effort to do nice things.

2 days

I mentioned that I tried some new moves at the gym on Tuesday night that I read about in Women's Health. Of those moves squats and lunges were incorporated and I did probably 3-4 sets. I noticed towards the end of the day yesterday that my legs were feeling really tight. Last night at the hostess stand I kept trying to in a non obvious way stretch. The floor at the restaurant is concrete so I guess standing on my feet for 4.5 hours did not help my legs at all.
This morning when I woke up my legs were so sore, they still are!! I have to say those moves must be incredibly effective and I really need to go buy that magazine so I can have the moves for future reference. I am amazed that such seemingly simple excercises had such a big impact! I tried to drink a lot of water yesterday because I've heard that helps for muscle soreness but any other tips would be appreciated!!
I plan to do arms again tonight but not do legs since I'm still so sore. Hopefully my run tonight will loosen up the tightness some.

Running, Jack, So many clothes

I've been meaning to recap last night and it's been a busy morning! I typically don't like to work out after having my hair done. There's just something about how great your hair looks after someone else has done it but I knew I was going to have to suck it up and get a few miles in. My one requirement for Samantha was that I had to be able to pull all of my hair up into a pony tail and it does all go up. It's a very short pony tail but it does go.
Last night was one of those really great work outs! I think because I had just read Women's Health while waiting at the chiropractor and they had some new moves that I tried. I read an article about how it's better to do free weights at the gym rather than sit on the machines. So I tried to remember what I could, I plan to buy the magazine so I can have those moves!! It's the July/August issue. After the strength training I ran 4 miles on the treadmill. We were having thunderstorms and I just didn't feel like getting caught in one last night while trying to run.
Tomorrow night I think I will try and get in another strength training session along with the run. It's SO nice when my restaurant schedule is every other day and not days in a row, it means I can actually get good workouts in!! I have my 8 mile route planned for Saturday and I'm looking forward to it!!
Miss K (this is my nickname for the roommate it just fits her) has a second interview with the golf course for the part time gig, I'm pretty sure she'll get this one and the job that she landed last week she will no longer need. The golf course would be safer, more money and better hours so a win all around. Then she had an interview for more of a career type job and she found another career type job she would be very interested in. She's definitely going to land on her feet. I just got an email that she and Jack are being lazy. I really appreciate the fact that I know my dog is being spoiled rotten right now! He's going to be kind of upset when she's not there all the time to love on him and take him for walks!
Saturday night will also be another night out. I said I'm trying to figure out my outfit and I've yet to determine what I have that will work. I have a TON of clothing but it's been so many years since I've actually "gone out" that this type of clothing is no longer really in my closet. I have things that work and in the winter time this is so much easier. Really great jeans and a fabulous top will usually always work but with it being the hottest part of summer jeans just aren't going to cut it right now. So I'm trying to put together pieces and tie something together and maybe purchase an accessory or two in order to make it fantastic!

Pictures from the morning

I had to share the under the covers shot because I think it's funny how Jack Banner stayed underneath the covers avoiding the light til I made him wake up. My puppy is sooo not a morning dog. Don't judge, my bed is covered in clothing. It's what my room typically looks like and the rest of my house looks very nice and orderly. I can fit in the space with Jack and that's what matters. When you're coming and going constantly it's just not a high priority to hang everything back up. Add to that I have to shove stuff to fit one more thing in my closet during the week it's just easier to use my bed for more than just sleeping. Oh and I'm sorry for the picture quality I used my phone and all these look a little blurry.


This is Jack Banner after he finally decided to wake up this morning. Miss K took him on 2 walks yesterday and apparently wore him out. So he slept in while I got ready and right before I had to leave I woke him up to take him out.


Ok so this is not the greatest self portrait but like I said I took these shots with my camera phone because I don't actually have a digital camera. Or I do but not one that I've ever learned how to really use since it was a hand me down from my brother who has an awesome camera and lenses and all kinds of cool features and he knows how to use them. I really should look into getting a digital camera but for now the bigger priority is actually new hot rollers, yes I am a high maintenance girl!! I had 10 inches cut off, I'm really sorry I didn't actually get a before shot because I felt weird asking Samantha to take a picture with my phone. I did donate the hair to locks of love. I've heard about it and love the concept and since I was cutting my hair anyways I figured why not. I actually cut off more than I had planned but it will grow.

Todays the day....

I get my hair cut!!! I'm so excited about this seeing as how it hasn't even been trimmed since December... Samantha is the best stylist EVER!!! I've sent her many of my friends due to her awesomeness!!!
Another girls night is being planned for Saturday night and I'm already plotting out my outfit. My long run will be that morning so I'll have that out of the way before we go out. I added up receipts from Friday night and realized Saturday night we'll have to go out a little later in order to avoid spending quite that much money but that's ok.
So maybe TMI but whatever, I mentioned that last week I didn't really have PMS but this week, yeah it caught up with me even though I guess it's hormonal rather than PMS which I don't exactly get since I'm young. I will say that me breaking up with S had nothing, at all, to do with PMS and I think that's actually a first. I've been known to break up and have major fights during that week so I can legitimately say I was frustrated and mad without any other factors then he was not for me and I finally realized it and dealt with it. I would like to figure out how to make the fat feeling go away. I'm thinking that even if I was my "happy" weight I would still feel fat on this week. The fact that I have eaten several pieces of chocolate and a couple bags of 100 calorie pack cookies is probably not helping things but I do have a run planned for after my hair cut tonight. Which does kind of bum me out since you know your hair always looks cutest comeing directly from the stylist and I'm totally going to ruin that because I'm a hot sweaty mess when I run.
I had to go to Walmart on my lunch to pick up milk bones, baby shampoo(best stuff ever for removing eye makeup and helps prevent styes) and wandered thru the clothes. They had this really cute little cotton dress that I totally may go back and get. Couldn't justify it today but it was super cute!

Control

Yesterday I had a conversation with a friend who is questioning her marriage and why she's in it. Then last night I read a post about marriage that was real and honest and hurting. These made me realize, yet again, that nothing is ever as it appears from the outside looking in. It's hard when I get so focused on what I want and where I want to be that I forget that even when I have what I think I want there will still be challenges and it's not going to be a bed of roses and perfect all the time. I do know this and I do remind myself but when you're in one place it's easy to believe that the grass is greener on the other side!! I prayed first thing after waking up. I keep a running list of prayer requests and throughout the day when I think of someone or something I say a prayer. I very clearly had 2 thoughts this morning, wait on me and patience. Neither of these words, wait or patience, do I like, AT ALL! The pastor at my church is always reminding us that it's not all about us, but rather all about Him. This means that we reach out into the community and look for ways to be a shining light. We don't stay inside the 4 walls of our church but rather we are called to make a difference in our world. Perhaps it seems odd that I write about going and then church but if you look in the New Testament Jesus went to weddings and hung out with people so we are free to have fun but to also make a difference (disclaimer, being the falling down drunk girl is not being that shining light example and we are also told to be different and do things in moderation Friday night I was delighted to find that I had so much fun while still maintaining decorum! That glass of water in between every drink trick really works!!) Back to my original thought process…
There was a verse that went through my mind and it was Isaiah 40:31 I went and looked it up and I'm posting Isaiah 40:28-31
"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
Often when I'm running and particularly tired verse 31 is a verse I repeat. This morning I was thinking about how there's so much I don't understand and how I'm tired of waiting. I'm reminded I'm not always supposed to understand and I'm not expected to have all the strength on my own.

Isaiah 12:2 "Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation."

Isaiah 30:18-21 "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him! O people of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more. How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."

Proverbs 3:3-6 "Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."

It's hard for me to wait, it's hard for me to trust. I am so guilty of "ok here's this part and this part but I'm going to hang on to this part just a while longer because really I just don't want to give it up because that means that I don't have any control". Really I don't have control but that is so not something that I like to admit and I try to reason it away. It doesn't work very well either! When I look back and see His hand at work then I know that when I just give it up and let go then He really can move in my life. I just have frequently remind myself of the fact that I'm not the one in control.

Ten on Tuesday

I borrowed this from Lisa Happy Tuesday!!

1. What is the worst movie you have ever seen? Dude where's my car, I went with my little brother

2. Do you have a favorite Disney/Pixar film? Disney = Parent Trap (the one with Hailey Mills) Pixar = Toy Story

3. Do you have a favorite movie from the 80′s? I love so many of them but it's probably a tie between Dirty Dancing and Steele Magnolias

4. Are there any movies you saw more than once in the theater? I can't think of any, although I would have seen the Proposal again in the theatre

5. What is one city/area of the US (or country you live if you do not live in the US) that you have not seen but would like to see? I've travelled all over the US but I've never seen the CA wine country and I would really love to!!

6. What are your favorite toppings on an Ice Cream Sundae? If we weren't taking calories into account, fudgy brownie pieces, candied pecans, chocolate sauce, tons and tons of whip cream and cherries

7. How many proms did you go to? What color was your prom dress? If you went to multiple proms, what color was your favorite prom dress? I did not go to prom because my school had a banquet (in AG dancing is a sin) so instead I went to the Children of the American Revolution National Convention that took place in DC at the same time as that banquet both my Junior and Senior year. I actually had way more fun because I was able to have a fancy dinner, dance, and hang out with a lot of very fun people. I had a Scott McClintock beautiful blue ballgown that I wore my junior year and then the next year I wore a black dress. When I went on Regional Tour after my senior year I had 8 different formal banquets that I attended. I borrowed dresses and had a few and I LOVED getting dressed up and doing my hair and makeup!! My favorite dress was a 40's style number that had a beautiful neckline and flowy chiffon skirt and it was gorgeous!!

8. Is there a sport or extra-curricular activity that you didn’t get to try as a child that you wish you would have? (e.g. gymnastics, piano lessons, ballet, etc.) I did ballet, tap, I had to do gymnastics in PE and hated it. I also played softball and volleyball. I loved volleyball!!! Softball is so not my sport. I got hit in the face and had a horrible black eye and I've never played again!!

10. Do you feel like you fit in with your age group? Or do you feel younger/older than your age group? Now I do, I have friends who are my age, some who are older, some who are younger. When I was younger my friends were usually older than me. Now I have a range and I can usually talk to anyone!!