They totally blocked blogger at work. I was so very sad when I realized this. It's not like I could read that many blogs anymore anyways but I was still able to post and now I can't even do that.
We got snow on Tuesday and it was beautiful but didn't create any issues with the roads because it didn't accumulate. I met Lisa for dinner to help celebrate her birthday that was last Thursday. It was so good to see her and to revisit an old favorite of mine, Thai Taste on East Blvd.
Wednesday I had a bag packed, they were calling for more snow and my college roomie who lives less than 5 miles from my office invited me to stay at her house if it got bad. When I drove in there was nothing falling from the sky. Fast forward about an hour or 2 and it started falling and the roads got bad fast. They sent us home at 11 even though the office didn't officially close until 12. It took me 40 minutes to get to Tiffany's house because the road conditions were so bad and I drive a Mazda 3, definitely not a snow car.
I enjoyed hanging out with Tiff and her little girl. We had lunch and dinner and talked and K played in the snow. I had to be prepared to go to work in the morning because my company usually will not close the office unless it's really bad.
I checked the weather line at 4am and we were still not delayed or closed so I emailed my manager that I would be in late. At 6:20 I got the message that the office was closed.
After breakfast I was able to catch a ride with Tiff's next door neighbor to go to the grocery store for the essentials, like beer.... and wine.... oh and milk and the stuff for dinner that night.
When I got back from the store we walked to the park with the neighbors. Tiff's neighborhood has a bunch of kids all around the same age and they all play together and it's really neat! The girls had fun at the park and then they went to play at one of the little girl's houses. Tiff and I talked and started making dinner.
Eventually the girls all came back to her house and K had her first sleepover with the 2 other little girls.
As Tiff and I were talking it came up about my wedding and I found out that D had snapped at her. I was horrified and I am so glad that I found out about it. He has contacted me every day since I left. He is swearing up and down that he is changed and different and begging me to come back. I am done.She said that she tried to just chalk it up to nerves but it really threw her that he was so rude that day.
This morning the office was on a delay. They were still trying to clear the parking lot when I got there. Then this afternoon trying to get up the hill to my parents I got stuck. Some sweet kid stopped and gave me a push so I could go down to my Aunt and Uncle's driveway, where I got stuck. My mom and I shoveled the driveway so I could get up it and then went down and shoveled my car out, fun times.
Tonight my parents are going to dinner and I'm going to clean. I was supposed to clean Wednesday since I said that I would just keep to the same schedule as my every other week clean they just don't have to pay me anymore but since I was gone Wednesday night I'm going to knock that out tonight.
Originally I was supposed to have a date with my adorable nephew but that has been postponed. I am going up tomorrow to see my brother, SIL and cutie nephew!
Happy Valentines all!!!
Showing posts with label Life Family Friendship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life Family Friendship. Show all posts
Friday, February 14, 2014
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
July Ohio Visit
Thursday July 4 after lunch we made the drive to Ohio. To
visit our friends, and catch up on their lives. Daron wanted to do a reunion
for the church that he started and he created an event on FB and invited
everyone.
When he first told me he planned to give a message I was
hesitant but instead of discouraging him I simply started praying about it.
We arrived around 9:30 on Thursday evening at our friend's
house. Their 6 kids came pouring outside to greet us. Oh the cacophony of sounds
as the kids and 2 puppies greeted us. They have 2 4 month old miniature
dachshund puppies who are the most adorable little babies and Audra and I were
in love immediately. Even Daron couldn't help but love on them too.
Friday morning I went to a Jazzercise class with Tiffany.
She's an instructor but wasn't teaching a class until the following week but I
had a great time in my first class, it's a fun workout! Then we hit up the
grocery store. When we got home we collected Ryan and Daron and went for lunch.
Daron polished off another pound burger, and pound of fries in a 10 minute eating
challenge. Friday afternoon was just a lazy at home kind of time. The kids were
running around, I was on the couch reading. Daron left to work on what he was
going to say the next day.
Saturday morning I was up early for my run. Audra and I rode
with Tiffany and the kids to the park where the "reunion" was taking
place.
The Sunday before we left he explained that he was going to give his story of what had happened since leaving Ohio. He actually ended the story right at when Audra came along which entirely left me out of the story. It's fine, I didn't need the recognition, I know that it's been the prayers of mine, my family and friends that have brought us to the place where we are. I will say it was confusing for some as to who I was. Fortunately I had read what he was going to say so I wasn't caught off guard by what he didn't say.
It was a good time, and I think those who had been left hanging, or who
had been hurt by the loss of contact began to understand what the past few
years had held. I know that the part of the story that he left out is the part
of the story that God is still working. He's not done yet with my husband.
Saturday afternoon we swam in the pool and relaxed. That
evening friends came over and hung out and we watched a huge fireworks display
that the neighbor put on. It was amazing!
Sunday we headed out around 10:30am. We got caught in
traffic in WV for about an hour and 45 minutes. My husband in that kind of
traffic is not a pleasant person. Fortunately I was sitting in the back with
Audra and she and I watched movies and colored and I did my best to keep her
entertained while Daron stewed in the front seat.
Fortunately I had Monday off from work. I took Audra back to
her mom's and picked Jack up. It was good for me to have a day to get caught up
before I had to be back at work.
Work is still crazy busy. Hence my lack of posting. I miss
google reader and I’m trying to make sure to go to my blogs and comment when I
get the few minutes. I can get some access on my Kindle at work but even still
it blocks the blogspot blogs, which is so frustrating. Oh well, most places
have wifi so I just have to figure out how to work this into my schedule during
the week when I'm on lunch.
Somehow we're already to the middle of July. Audra starts
school in a month. We've had so much rain here I think I spotted webs on my
feet this morning! On that note, I better get back to work. Happy Wednesday!
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Life on Life's terms
Last night I didn't give in to my I'm too tired excuse. I forced myself out the door anyways. My Old Navy pants and 2 dresses arrived. The pants, from their workout stuff, fit perfectly!!!
It was so windy and such a perfect night to stay in! I put on the big girl pants (or in my case the cute ON pants) and went on to the gym.
This morning I was up earlier then usual because I had to take suitcases to my parents. Of course the trip that they are planing had me thinking about the last time I travelled with the suitcase. In January 2010 I flew to Miami for my first 1/2 marathon. That was such a memorable experience. While I have no regrets and do not miss (or like) Shawn at all, I am thankful for that trip!
In January 2011 I flew to Vegas. I'm glad that I had the opportunity to go. I'm also glad that the trip gave me the chance to see what I needed to see in order to break up with Seth. He was definitely not the one for me.
I suppose it could be eye brow raising that I had no qualms about traveling with these guys but really, I got some awesome trips out of them and then discovered that they just were not right for me. I genuinely liked them, they offered, and they bought the plane tickets.
In 2006 I had an invite to the Bahamas, I turned that one down. If you remember me talking about DB, it was a trip with him. Even then I knew I couldn't stand him long enough to go on that kind of trip with him. I drive by his neighborhood often, and I think every single time how I glad I am that as screwed up as I am I eventually realized that no matter how much money he had he was still not at all in any way shape or form right for me.
It's interesting to me that as difficult as the first year of marriage was, and despite the challenges still ahead, I don't really ever doubt that the one I married is absolutely the one for me. I also find it interesting that I spent years thinking that I had to get married only to get married and realize that I really don't need him. Oh I love him, I just don't need him. Which makes the dynamic of our relationship different then any relationship I've had.
I wouldn't be where I am if I hadn't married who I married. It's not perfect, it's often times a challenge. There are days when I wish that I could just say bye, those are most often the times when I'm not getting my way. I'm learning how to choose when to take a stand and when to back away.
He believes that I never think I am wrong. He doesn't realize that I often question myself, and if I need to change my stance on something. He doesn't realize that with him, I can only back down if I am absolutely sure that I am in the wrong, and a lot of times in the situations where the accusation is being thrown, I'm not wrong.
He has changed. He had to. I changed for me, and as a result I learned to stand up for myself, I found myself. I told him that his decisions and his choices are his to make, but that doesn't mean that I have to stay and live with those decisions and choices if I don't agree with them.
These days what we have, is what I believed we would have when I agreed to marry him. It's probably even better, simply because I have such a sense of my own identity.
I had a choices last summer. I could walk away, knowing that I stood to repeat the same mistake again. I could stay and figure out myself, and why I made the choice that I made. I knew that my relationships all had a common factor, me. I knew that all my romantic relationships had been unsuccessful. While I knew that it wasn't all on me in my marriage I also realized that if I didn't figure out myself I was not going to ever be able to successfully figure out how to make a relationship work.
This past weekend Mr. Clean and I had the opportunity to just be us, and it was so nice. I like hanging out with him. I like doing stuff with him. Our chances to hang out, just us, are few and far between. It's nice to remember why I fell for him in the first place.
I had a blog post written about me a few years ago right before I met Mr. Clean. At that time I wondered why the person just didn't address it with me instead of using me as an example to make a point. The post talked about how I had such bad results with relationships in correlation with something the blogger was struggling with. I no longer question why I struggled so much, in looking back it's very clear to me my role and what was causing me to continue running on the same wheel. Nothing changes if nothing changes.
I know that Margaret and Margs and Patrice all had times when they wanted to tell me what to do, they wanted to tell me to walk away, they didn't. I'm sure some of y'all might have wanted to say the same thing. It's hard when you read or hear about real life and what's happening and you have definite opinions and you want to be able to help and make things better. Instead I had to learn how to handle life on life's terms.
When I was in Florida catching up with Patrice she freely admitted she was ready to tell me to just get out. Yet as we talked and I shared and I explained, and she actually saw me and where I'm at, she realized that I really have found my own identity. I had always surrounded myself with girlfriends who were strong, and outspoken.
I've mentioned several times I married someone a lot like my mom. With both my mom and my husband I have learned to stand my ground, learned to stand up, and learned when it's OK to let something go. It's not something that just happened over night. It's not that everything is suddenly utopia. I have blog posts in my head that I will never write because I don't want to write stories that might be part of my story, but there are too many others involved.
I've figured all this out and yet the one thing that I am still, and probably will always, fight with is my weight. I realized my pattern. I realized what I have to do. I'm making myself move. After this week I might get a better handle on the eating, maybe.
Even if I get a handle on my weight there are still plenty of variables in my life that will keep it interesting. I just might not be able to share on the blog!
It was so windy and such a perfect night to stay in! I put on the big girl pants (or in my case the cute ON pants) and went on to the gym.
This morning I was up earlier then usual because I had to take suitcases to my parents. Of course the trip that they are planing had me thinking about the last time I travelled with the suitcase. In January 2010 I flew to Miami for my first 1/2 marathon. That was such a memorable experience. While I have no regrets and do not miss (or like) Shawn at all, I am thankful for that trip!
In January 2011 I flew to Vegas. I'm glad that I had the opportunity to go. I'm also glad that the trip gave me the chance to see what I needed to see in order to break up with Seth. He was definitely not the one for me.
I suppose it could be eye brow raising that I had no qualms about traveling with these guys but really, I got some awesome trips out of them and then discovered that they just were not right for me. I genuinely liked them, they offered, and they bought the plane tickets.
In 2006 I had an invite to the Bahamas, I turned that one down. If you remember me talking about DB, it was a trip with him. Even then I knew I couldn't stand him long enough to go on that kind of trip with him. I drive by his neighborhood often, and I think every single time how I glad I am that as screwed up as I am I eventually realized that no matter how much money he had he was still not at all in any way shape or form right for me.
It's interesting to me that as difficult as the first year of marriage was, and despite the challenges still ahead, I don't really ever doubt that the one I married is absolutely the one for me. I also find it interesting that I spent years thinking that I had to get married only to get married and realize that I really don't need him. Oh I love him, I just don't need him. Which makes the dynamic of our relationship different then any relationship I've had.
I wouldn't be where I am if I hadn't married who I married. It's not perfect, it's often times a challenge. There are days when I wish that I could just say bye, those are most often the times when I'm not getting my way. I'm learning how to choose when to take a stand and when to back away.
He believes that I never think I am wrong. He doesn't realize that I often question myself, and if I need to change my stance on something. He doesn't realize that with him, I can only back down if I am absolutely sure that I am in the wrong, and a lot of times in the situations where the accusation is being thrown, I'm not wrong.
He has changed. He had to. I changed for me, and as a result I learned to stand up for myself, I found myself. I told him that his decisions and his choices are his to make, but that doesn't mean that I have to stay and live with those decisions and choices if I don't agree with them.
These days what we have, is what I believed we would have when I agreed to marry him. It's probably even better, simply because I have such a sense of my own identity.
I had a choices last summer. I could walk away, knowing that I stood to repeat the same mistake again. I could stay and figure out myself, and why I made the choice that I made. I knew that my relationships all had a common factor, me. I knew that all my romantic relationships had been unsuccessful. While I knew that it wasn't all on me in my marriage I also realized that if I didn't figure out myself I was not going to ever be able to successfully figure out how to make a relationship work.
This past weekend Mr. Clean and I had the opportunity to just be us, and it was so nice. I like hanging out with him. I like doing stuff with him. Our chances to hang out, just us, are few and far between. It's nice to remember why I fell for him in the first place.
I had a blog post written about me a few years ago right before I met Mr. Clean. At that time I wondered why the person just didn't address it with me instead of using me as an example to make a point. The post talked about how I had such bad results with relationships in correlation with something the blogger was struggling with. I no longer question why I struggled so much, in looking back it's very clear to me my role and what was causing me to continue running on the same wheel. Nothing changes if nothing changes.
I know that Margaret and Margs and Patrice all had times when they wanted to tell me what to do, they wanted to tell me to walk away, they didn't. I'm sure some of y'all might have wanted to say the same thing. It's hard when you read or hear about real life and what's happening and you have definite opinions and you want to be able to help and make things better. Instead I had to learn how to handle life on life's terms.
When I was in Florida catching up with Patrice she freely admitted she was ready to tell me to just get out. Yet as we talked and I shared and I explained, and she actually saw me and where I'm at, she realized that I really have found my own identity. I had always surrounded myself with girlfriends who were strong, and outspoken.
I've mentioned several times I married someone a lot like my mom. With both my mom and my husband I have learned to stand my ground, learned to stand up, and learned when it's OK to let something go. It's not something that just happened over night. It's not that everything is suddenly utopia. I have blog posts in my head that I will never write because I don't want to write stories that might be part of my story, but there are too many others involved.
I've figured all this out and yet the one thing that I am still, and probably will always, fight with is my weight. I realized my pattern. I realized what I have to do. I'm making myself move. After this week I might get a better handle on the eating, maybe.
Even if I get a handle on my weight there are still plenty of variables in my life that will keep it interesting. I just might not be able to share on the blog!
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
5 Minutes
Friday morning I was up early, like 3:50 AM early. I had to be at the airport for my 7:15 flight at 6AM, because I'm one of those people who likes to be at the airport to hurry up and wait. It's my nature.
The flight out of Charlotte landed and the flight out of Atlanta to Tampa was smooth. I was so excited. I may have gotten a little teary thinking of the fact that I was finally visiting Patrice after all this time of her living in Florida. I was supposed to go in June 2011 but then I had a wedding...
We landed and Patrice picked me up. Our plan for the weekend, to stay home. I was there specifically to help. Her husbands family owns the West Palm Beach Antique show, if you are ever down that way go, it's amazing and someday I hope to get there myself.
The show was this weekend so several months back, thinking that Baby L would be a month old she and I planned for me to visit while her husband was out of town so I could be there to help. Baby L had different plans, he made his appearance on June 29, so he is by calendar birth date 3 months old now. However, her due date was September 6, and with preemies developmentally you go more by the original due date. So he's very much a typical 1 month old. Translation he does lots of eating and sleeping and he is slowly becoming more alert.
Friday evening we visited the grocery store and she made dinner, while I held Baby L. Saturday morning I was up early to hold Baby L so Patrice could sleep a little while. Saturday later in the morning I went for a run. Florida is crazy hot, it's October and it was in the 80's.
Saturday afternoon we ventured out for Thai food, we picked it up. Then we went home again. I did not wear makeup for 2 days, it was fabulous!!!
She and I watched SATC, we started with Season 1 and made it to Season 3 disc 1, but we would get distracted talking. We talked for hours. This is the kind of friendship where we may only see each other a few times a year, but when we do it's like we've never been apart. I love her like my sister, and the feeling is mutual.
Sunday evening her husband arrived home and we heard about the show and opened some fun baby presents.
Monday my flight left at 1:30. The flight was delayed by 10 minutes, and fortunately my flight out of Atlanta was also delayed, otherwise I probably would have missed it.
I am so thankful I had the chance to go for a visit. I'm so hopeful that eventually they will be able to move closer, so that I can drive for visits more often.
I picked up Jack from my parents, he was very happy to see me!!! Mr. Clean was glad to have me home! Today it's back to work. The part I like about vacation least, is having to face the email and tasks at work when I get back, it can be overwhelming!
Happy Tuesday!!!
Monday, August 20, 2012
5 Minutes
Friday night I got home and took Jack for a walk. Followed by dinner. Girl Clean was with her mom and I agreed to pick her up at 10 Saturday morning.
Saturday morning I was at the gym at 10 minute to 8. It opens at 8. At 8:10 the guy finally arrived. I was a little frustrated. I needed to get started at 8 to make the most of my gym time. I knew I had to be home by 9 in order to shower and leave by 9:30.
I was home at 9, and out the door by 9:30. I picked up the girl and drove home. She played with her Dad while I finished getting ready. We left at 11:30 to meet my friend Nicole, her boyfriend and his 2 girls for lunch. I satisfied my never ending Mexican craving. Mr. Clean doesn't like Mexican so it's usually what I will request when going out to eat with a girlfriend. Since all the kids love Mexican I knew it was a safe choice for lunch for Saturday.
We ran errands after lunch and then had church Saturday night. Girl Clean and I hung out after church while her Dad ran to the store. I fed her and bathed her and then dried her hair. Her hair is so long that it tangles up at night. I usually braid it but she was going to her Grandparent's church on Sunday and I didn't want to do braids for the outfit I had in my head.
Years ago I used to occasionally roll my hair with socks. Significantly less painful then foam rollers it works not quite as well but I wondered if it might do OK with her hair. I rolled her hair before bed.
Sunday morning I was up early. My plan was a 5 or 6 mile run depending on how I felt. It was raining and I was hooked into a book on my Kindle. I got a free book on Friday night that I enjoyed so much I bought (and finished) the next 2 on Saturday and Sunday. Ruth Cardello is the name of the author, they are light, cheesy, easy read romance novels and I was hooked!!!
Girl Clean woke up at 9. We took the socks out of her hair and sure enough the socks worked great!! I was thrilled with the result and so was she! I fed her breakfast and got her dressed. Her mom picked her up and Mr. Clean and I discussed our plans for the rest of the day.
He had errands to run. I was planning to go to the gym at 12 when it opened. I finished up my book and headed out. I was able to run 6 on the treadmill. I am thankful for the personal TV's, Food Network and HGTV!!!
Dinner with Bean and Jelly was at 5. We met them at a place in Salisbury. I had gone online and really liked the menu so we were excited to try it. I think Bean and Jelly liked their food. I definitely liked my pasta. Mr. Clean did not like his at all but I was incredibly thankful that he didn't mention it. While I am not opposed to sending something back if it's not done right, I am opposed to making everyone else uncomfortable just because the food you ordered doesn't meet your idea of what you were expecting.
He bit his tongue every time the waitress asked how we were doing. To me this is huge progress!!! Bean and Jelly picked up the tab for dinner. We were not quite ready for the night to end so they agreed to walk over to Krispy Kreme where the hot and now sign had come on. We treated to the donuts and sat and talked for a while longer.
I am so thankful the weekend was so nice!!! Happy Monday!!!
Saturday morning I was at the gym at 10 minute to 8. It opens at 8. At 8:10 the guy finally arrived. I was a little frustrated. I needed to get started at 8 to make the most of my gym time. I knew I had to be home by 9 in order to shower and leave by 9:30.
I was home at 9, and out the door by 9:30. I picked up the girl and drove home. She played with her Dad while I finished getting ready. We left at 11:30 to meet my friend Nicole, her boyfriend and his 2 girls for lunch. I satisfied my never ending Mexican craving. Mr. Clean doesn't like Mexican so it's usually what I will request when going out to eat with a girlfriend. Since all the kids love Mexican I knew it was a safe choice for lunch for Saturday.
We ran errands after lunch and then had church Saturday night. Girl Clean and I hung out after church while her Dad ran to the store. I fed her and bathed her and then dried her hair. Her hair is so long that it tangles up at night. I usually braid it but she was going to her Grandparent's church on Sunday and I didn't want to do braids for the outfit I had in my head.
Years ago I used to occasionally roll my hair with socks. Significantly less painful then foam rollers it works not quite as well but I wondered if it might do OK with her hair. I rolled her hair before bed.
Sunday morning I was up early. My plan was a 5 or 6 mile run depending on how I felt. It was raining and I was hooked into a book on my Kindle. I got a free book on Friday night that I enjoyed so much I bought (and finished) the next 2 on Saturday and Sunday. Ruth Cardello is the name of the author, they are light, cheesy, easy read romance novels and I was hooked!!!
Girl Clean woke up at 9. We took the socks out of her hair and sure enough the socks worked great!! I was thrilled with the result and so was she! I fed her breakfast and got her dressed. Her mom picked her up and Mr. Clean and I discussed our plans for the rest of the day.
He had errands to run. I was planning to go to the gym at 12 when it opened. I finished up my book and headed out. I was able to run 6 on the treadmill. I am thankful for the personal TV's, Food Network and HGTV!!!
Dinner with Bean and Jelly was at 5. We met them at a place in Salisbury. I had gone online and really liked the menu so we were excited to try it. I think Bean and Jelly liked their food. I definitely liked my pasta. Mr. Clean did not like his at all but I was incredibly thankful that he didn't mention it. While I am not opposed to sending something back if it's not done right, I am opposed to making everyone else uncomfortable just because the food you ordered doesn't meet your idea of what you were expecting.
He bit his tongue every time the waitress asked how we were doing. To me this is huge progress!!! Bean and Jelly picked up the tab for dinner. We were not quite ready for the night to end so they agreed to walk over to Krispy Kreme where the hot and now sign had come on. We treated to the donuts and sat and talked for a while longer.
I am so thankful the weekend was so nice!!! Happy Monday!!!
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Recently
When we were in Ohio Girl Clean learned for the first time that I am her stepmommy. She was so little when we first got married that we didn't explain this. I've always been Lori, and that's what everyone calls me.
There were so many kids and it came up with them that I am her stepmom. The first time this came up with Mr. Clean and I was on Saturday night after the pool party. It was super late and she was watching TV with M, the little boy she is telling everyone she's going to marry. She came into the room and said, mom, stepmom, and we both said Lori? She said, yes, and then asked us whatever it was that she had come in for.
The next time it came up was last week. Mr. Clean asked her where the bracelet she had on had come from. She said from my stepmommy. He said, "Lori?" She said, "yes, my stepmommy." It was a bracelet that I had given her. The kid has racked up on jewelry as I've been cleaning out my collection.
Sunday on our drive home from OH we were about an hour into the trip when Mr. Clean received a text from Mike. Mike told him "don't screw this one up, I LOVE your wife". I laughed and told Mr. Clean to text him back that I loved him too.
The weeks leading up to the trip Mr. Clean has said a few times that he really hoped I liked Mike and that he really couldn't wait for me to meet his friend. I had reminded my husband that I tend to get along with most people. Mr. Clean had told Mike if I didn't like him he would never know because I would be too polite to show it. Reality, I genuinely usually like most people that I meet. You have to be just an absolute jerk of a person for me not to like you. This is not to say that I don't have some people I like more then others but I will try to be nice to everyone.
Mike's wife Chris was so nervous about us coming. She was worried about me because she had never met me. Which I understand, there are a lot of unknowns when you have a person you've never met coming to your house. It worked out fine. I loved her, and have talked to her a few times since the trip. I'm most excited that they really want to come visit us!
Yesterday on FB Amy (Girl Clean's mom) posted about how thankful she is to have me in their lives. I commented that Girl Clean is a joy and I'm blessed to be a part of her life and that I love them too. I don't always agree but I do always try to make sure that the lines of communication are open. It's so not an easy dynamic and yet God is faithful and as I continually pray I see how life continues to track along for us all.
Today is the first day of ballet class for the summer. We are all super excited about this!!! Girl Clean has been "doing ballet" ever since her ballerina for a day class. I'm amazed at what comes back to me from all my years of class!!
The healthy eating, habits that needed to be broken. The trip derailed that one. As of today I'm trying again. It's so difficult, and yet I know that with God all things are possible and it's a lie that this is something that I can't overcome.
The temperatures are in the 80's today, OH HAPPY DAY!!!! Happy Tuesday!!!
Monday, June 25, 2012
recap
I realized this morning that I have 0 pictures of the baby shower. None.
It simply never occurred to me, I only had my phone, it was not anywhere on my brain to capture the moments.
Friday I picked Patrice up from the airport. I made sure I had snacks in the car. I knew if it was me and I had flown being pregnant the likelihood of me being sick was high, so I wanted to be prepared just in case. Patrice had already told me she gets sick if she goes too long without eating anyways.
We drove to her aunt's house where the shower was being held. My mom, her mom, her aunt, her grandmother, her cousins and her middle sister were all there. We washed spinach, prepped stuff and talked. The decorating was already done when we arrived.
Seeing your oldest friend, who is more like your sister, pregnant is a little surreal. Much like watching her at her wedding, I had some out of body moments. She never wanted kids, ever. So this whole thing is completely beyond anything she planned. Her wedding, she had planned many times over from the time we were in the 7th grade.
This pregnancy, she tried to get the doctor to schedule a c-section or induction, the doctor said no dice. For my friend the super planner this is making her feel edgy and twitchy. The doctor said talk to me the day after your due date.
Because she is 33 they are considering her to be on the high risk side. She's not yet 35 and they consider her high risk. I don't understand this at all.
I drove Patrice and Ally to their parent's house and then drove home. I went into the garage where I've had boxes of my stuff since last year. I had pictures that had hung on my walls that had been in an open box that I wanted to get into covered boxes. I knew I had stuffed lions from my college days that I was ready to let go of. I had been holding on to them because I planned to someday use them for my child's nursery but since that is no longer my plan I knew it was safe to pass the along.
I had 2 trash bags full of stuffed lions with a bear and giraffe thrown into that mix. I figured out what can be donated, what I'm holding on to, and figured out how to get everything into closed containers so that hopefully my things are better protected.
I also was able to switch my shoes, the summer shoes came down to the reachable shelf, and the winter ones went up to the top shelf.
Saturday morning Jack and I went for a 4 mile run. It was already ridiculously humid at 6:30 Saturday morning.
I was at Patrice's aunt's at 10. We got all the stuff out, and guests started arriving.
What I love about these events is the fact that we see women who have been a part of our lives throughout all these years. Our 4th, 7th, and 8th grade teachers were all there. We had a friend who came who shares my birthday and grew up with us.
I love the time spent. I love the prayers that we said. I'm thankful that I had the chance to be there. It is so special to me to have this background. I wrote the presents down, and who gave them. They just kept coming, it was awesome!!
I passed along the bags of lions (and bears and giraffe) to Patrice to go through. I told her whatever they don't use to donate to the children's area at the local hospital, if they are allowed to do that. I don't know the rules now when it comes to stuff like that. Her husband works for the hospital so I know he will either take them there or they will find someplace to donate them to.
After the shower I drove home to rest for a minute and then we had church.
Yesterday Amy dropped Girl Clean off at 12:30 and we hung out with her for a few hours.
This is another short week for me, YAY!!! I have Friday off and I'm so looking forward to it!!!
Happy Monday!!!!
It simply never occurred to me, I only had my phone, it was not anywhere on my brain to capture the moments.
Friday I picked Patrice up from the airport. I made sure I had snacks in the car. I knew if it was me and I had flown being pregnant the likelihood of me being sick was high, so I wanted to be prepared just in case. Patrice had already told me she gets sick if she goes too long without eating anyways.
We drove to her aunt's house where the shower was being held. My mom, her mom, her aunt, her grandmother, her cousins and her middle sister were all there. We washed spinach, prepped stuff and talked. The decorating was already done when we arrived.
Seeing your oldest friend, who is more like your sister, pregnant is a little surreal. Much like watching her at her wedding, I had some out of body moments. She never wanted kids, ever. So this whole thing is completely beyond anything she planned. Her wedding, she had planned many times over from the time we were in the 7th grade.
This pregnancy, she tried to get the doctor to schedule a c-section or induction, the doctor said no dice. For my friend the super planner this is making her feel edgy and twitchy. The doctor said talk to me the day after your due date.
Because she is 33 they are considering her to be on the high risk side. She's not yet 35 and they consider her high risk. I don't understand this at all.
I drove Patrice and Ally to their parent's house and then drove home. I went into the garage where I've had boxes of my stuff since last year. I had pictures that had hung on my walls that had been in an open box that I wanted to get into covered boxes. I knew I had stuffed lions from my college days that I was ready to let go of. I had been holding on to them because I planned to someday use them for my child's nursery but since that is no longer my plan I knew it was safe to pass the along.
I had 2 trash bags full of stuffed lions with a bear and giraffe thrown into that mix. I figured out what can be donated, what I'm holding on to, and figured out how to get everything into closed containers so that hopefully my things are better protected.
I also was able to switch my shoes, the summer shoes came down to the reachable shelf, and the winter ones went up to the top shelf.
Saturday morning Jack and I went for a 4 mile run. It was already ridiculously humid at 6:30 Saturday morning.
I was at Patrice's aunt's at 10. We got all the stuff out, and guests started arriving.
What I love about these events is the fact that we see women who have been a part of our lives throughout all these years. Our 4th, 7th, and 8th grade teachers were all there. We had a friend who came who shares my birthday and grew up with us.
I love the time spent. I love the prayers that we said. I'm thankful that I had the chance to be there. It is so special to me to have this background. I wrote the presents down, and who gave them. They just kept coming, it was awesome!!
I passed along the bags of lions (and bears and giraffe) to Patrice to go through. I told her whatever they don't use to donate to the children's area at the local hospital, if they are allowed to do that. I don't know the rules now when it comes to stuff like that. Her husband works for the hospital so I know he will either take them there or they will find someplace to donate them to.
After the shower I drove home to rest for a minute and then we had church.
Yesterday Amy dropped Girl Clean off at 12:30 and we hung out with her for a few hours.
This is another short week for me, YAY!!! I have Friday off and I'm so looking forward to it!!!
Happy Monday!!!!
Monday, April 30, 2012
Presents, Races, Parties, Friendship and Food
Friday night I left work and drove to pick up Girl Clean. Then she and I went and picked up Mr. Clean. We went to dinner, dropped Mr. Clean off at the house and then went to find birthday presents. Girl Clean's brothers birthday was Sunday and we were going to a birthday party for my college roommates little girl on Saturday.
I found a great sundress on sale at Kohls for K. I was so excited at the sale they were having! We found legos for Girl Clean's brother. It was so cute how excited she was to pick out a card and present for her brother!
We arrived home and wound down. Then we put a movie in and went to bed. I had to be up early on Saturday morning. Jack and I drove down to my friend Nicole's and picked her up. I left Jack to play with her 2 dogs. Fortunately we know from past experience that her 2 do really well with my bossy little bully who is only a 1/3 of their size.
We picked up our chips and hung out waiting for the race to start. My goal was to run this one at under a 9 minute mile. I knew it was a perfect flat course and I should be able to meet this. My PR from the 2010 Runway 5K was an 8:50 minute mile. Since that race I have not been under a 9 minute mile. Saturday morning was perfect temperature wise! I pushed more towards the middle and end. I've learned not to push too hard at the start or I end up not finishing strong because I cramp or something happens. I hold back in order to push more once I am warmed up.
Crossing the finish the clock read 28:15 so I knew I had potentially met my goal to be under a 9 minute mile. I picked up breakfast on my way home and logged onto the computer to see my time. It was not yet posted. Usually the race results are posted quickly so I was surprised but knew they would be up soon. I kept checking and checking, so frustrated that they were not yet up.
I took Mr. Clean back to pick up his car and Girl Clean and I headed to the party. It was at a great place. The first part of the party was in a room that had all kinds of bounce things like M Joes. The place also had games and bowling and laser tag. The downside to a birthday party where your girl doesn't know anyone, she is pretty much left out of the action. We were the first to arrive and I hoped that maybe Girl Clean would meet a friend and it would work out that she would have a buddy. That didn't happen.
I always watch her pretty close at these places. At 3 she is easily mistaken for 5 because she is so tall and does look a lot older then 3. I watched on one as she was passed by a few older girls. What bothers me about this is that at M Joes they don't let kids do this. It really concerned me because she was so high up, because she could have fallen, and because it was not the best scenario playing in mind for what "could" happen.
The next bounce "house" she went into I couldn't really see her and when she came out she had a huge red bump on her head and her heart was racing. I'm pretty sure she got kicked but when I asked what happened she would not tell me. After that she just wanted to be held. She did go back in one towards the end but I know that whatever happened freaked her out. She also kept trying to say hi to K. Kept asking where she was. She would go up and wave and say hi, which was really sweet. I also realize that K, being 5, was totally there to be with her friends and have fun and just totally ignored this girl she had never met before wondering why she was in her space. So lesson learned next time I have a party for one of my friends kids I won't take Girl Clean unless she already knows the guest of honor for the party.
We moved from the bounce house room into the party room. Cake was served and then present time. Here was where it was so evident that Girl Clean is just 3. She wanted to "help" K open her presents. I told her she needed to sit down, and her facial expression when you tell her no is pure absolute defiance. I've seen this face several times over the past few weeks. My girl can be sweet and awesome and she can also be an absolute pill. I pulled her up and held her while we watched K open presents. I told Girl Clean on her birthday she gets to open presents but K does not need help opening hers.
After the presents I was ready to go. Those places are loud and despite the opportunity to play video games I knew Girl Clean was pegging her fun meter. I drove her back to her mom's since it was not our official weekend and her mom wanted her back for her brother's birthday.
On the drive back I called Margs, she is my friend who moved to Canada a few weeks ago. She had left me a voice mail while I was at the party and when I heard it, because she said if I don't talk to you today I'll try you back tomorrow my immediate thought was she is calling to tell me she's pregnant. I called her back and after a few minutes of catching up she said "well I have something to tell you" and I said "you're pregnant"! Sure enough she is due October 15. So Patrice will have her baby boy on September 6, or sometime around there and then Margs will have her baby in October. I was so excited!!!
I arrived at Girl Clean's mom's and Girl Clean wanted to carry her brothers present and card in. She gave it to him and he opened it right away and he loved it!!!
I drove back to the house where Mr. Clean had made a fabulous dinner!!!
Yesterday was a super lazy day, which I really needed! I took Jack for a walk yesterday afternoon so that he could burn off some energy.
It's another Monday! Tomorrow is May! Life keeps moving!
I found a great sundress on sale at Kohls for K. I was so excited at the sale they were having! We found legos for Girl Clean's brother. It was so cute how excited she was to pick out a card and present for her brother!
We arrived home and wound down. Then we put a movie in and went to bed. I had to be up early on Saturday morning. Jack and I drove down to my friend Nicole's and picked her up. I left Jack to play with her 2 dogs. Fortunately we know from past experience that her 2 do really well with my bossy little bully who is only a 1/3 of their size.
We picked up our chips and hung out waiting for the race to start. My goal was to run this one at under a 9 minute mile. I knew it was a perfect flat course and I should be able to meet this. My PR from the 2010 Runway 5K was an 8:50 minute mile. Since that race I have not been under a 9 minute mile. Saturday morning was perfect temperature wise! I pushed more towards the middle and end. I've learned not to push too hard at the start or I end up not finishing strong because I cramp or something happens. I hold back in order to push more once I am warmed up.
Crossing the finish the clock read 28:15 so I knew I had potentially met my goal to be under a 9 minute mile. I picked up breakfast on my way home and logged onto the computer to see my time. It was not yet posted. Usually the race results are posted quickly so I was surprised but knew they would be up soon. I kept checking and checking, so frustrated that they were not yet up.
I took Mr. Clean back to pick up his car and Girl Clean and I headed to the party. It was at a great place. The first part of the party was in a room that had all kinds of bounce things like M Joes. The place also had games and bowling and laser tag. The downside to a birthday party where your girl doesn't know anyone, she is pretty much left out of the action. We were the first to arrive and I hoped that maybe Girl Clean would meet a friend and it would work out that she would have a buddy. That didn't happen.
I always watch her pretty close at these places. At 3 she is easily mistaken for 5 because she is so tall and does look a lot older then 3. I watched on one as she was passed by a few older girls. What bothers me about this is that at M Joes they don't let kids do this. It really concerned me because she was so high up, because she could have fallen, and because it was not the best scenario playing in mind for what "could" happen.
The next bounce "house" she went into I couldn't really see her and when she came out she had a huge red bump on her head and her heart was racing. I'm pretty sure she got kicked but when I asked what happened she would not tell me. After that she just wanted to be held. She did go back in one towards the end but I know that whatever happened freaked her out. She also kept trying to say hi to K. Kept asking where she was. She would go up and wave and say hi, which was really sweet. I also realize that K, being 5, was totally there to be with her friends and have fun and just totally ignored this girl she had never met before wondering why she was in her space. So lesson learned next time I have a party for one of my friends kids I won't take Girl Clean unless she already knows the guest of honor for the party.
We moved from the bounce house room into the party room. Cake was served and then present time. Here was where it was so evident that Girl Clean is just 3. She wanted to "help" K open her presents. I told her she needed to sit down, and her facial expression when you tell her no is pure absolute defiance. I've seen this face several times over the past few weeks. My girl can be sweet and awesome and she can also be an absolute pill. I pulled her up and held her while we watched K open presents. I told Girl Clean on her birthday she gets to open presents but K does not need help opening hers.
After the presents I was ready to go. Those places are loud and despite the opportunity to play video games I knew Girl Clean was pegging her fun meter. I drove her back to her mom's since it was not our official weekend and her mom wanted her back for her brother's birthday.
On the drive back I called Margs, she is my friend who moved to Canada a few weeks ago. She had left me a voice mail while I was at the party and when I heard it, because she said if I don't talk to you today I'll try you back tomorrow my immediate thought was she is calling to tell me she's pregnant. I called her back and after a few minutes of catching up she said "well I have something to tell you" and I said "you're pregnant"! Sure enough she is due October 15. So Patrice will have her baby boy on September 6, or sometime around there and then Margs will have her baby in October. I was so excited!!!
I arrived at Girl Clean's mom's and Girl Clean wanted to carry her brothers present and card in. She gave it to him and he opened it right away and he loved it!!!
I drove back to the house where Mr. Clean had made a fabulous dinner!!!
Yesterday was a super lazy day, which I really needed! I took Jack for a walk yesterday afternoon so that he could burn off some energy.
It's another Monday! Tomorrow is May! Life keeps moving!
Friday, April 20, 2012
It's a BOY
I got a call from Patrice on my lunch hour. Remember in SATC when Miranda tells Carrie she is having a boy and Carrie tears up? We had that moment over the phone. "Oh Patrice you are having a boy"... Why is everyone else but me crying when they hear the news.
She is actually more excited about this then Miranda was but it was just a moment I will probably never forget. He looks so incredibly perfect!!! She sent me the pictures, we can already tell he has her feet.
I honestly thought she was going to have a girl so I'm glad she found out what she is having. Otherwise I would have been buying lots of pink girly stuff, being so certain it would be a girl. Now I get to look forward to meeting baby boy in just a few months!!!!
She is actually more excited about this then Miranda was but it was just a moment I will probably never forget. He looks so incredibly perfect!!! She sent me the pictures, we can already tell he has her feet.
I honestly thought she was going to have a girl so I'm glad she found out what she is having. Otherwise I would have been buying lots of pink girly stuff, being so certain it would be a girl. Now I get to look forward to meeting baby boy in just a few months!!!!
Thursday, December 1, 2011
working out, notes, cookies, schedules Christmas
Tuesday night instead of a workout video I put away dishes and ate dinner. My meeting at 8 is necessary but with it being dark so early I don't feel comfortable going for a run and this is what I would most like to do. I worked Monday and Wednesday night. Tonight, I will get a workout of some kind in. I'm trying to make sure I track food, to be perfectly honest yesterday I just quit because I kept eating.
I know that trying to fit a workout in at lunch is just not do-able I sweat which means I would need a shower, and that is going to require more than a 1 hour lunch. It could be worse though. My commute allows me more time in the evening then a normal 8-5 schedule so I'm thankful!
I have 2 thank you notes to write to the ladies who did the cakes for the wedding. These hang over my head and I want to get those written this weekend.
MFT is coming up on Sunday and we are going to decorate cookies. I'm very excited about this!!! I plan to get at least 2 visits in before they move to Canada so this is the first time since I found out that they are moving that we were able to set up. I don't think about her move too much because it does make me cry.
I've been researching races for the next few months. December I won't be doing one, and January I haven't found any but I know there will be 2 for February. Both 5K's and one will be the UNCC race and that one is super hilly and I wouldn't run it if it wasn't for my mom. She likes to come cheer me on for that one. I'm hoping Bean and Jelly will run it too!!! Longer races are just not an option for me at this point in time due to the training required. I know that December and January I'm particularly not fond of super long distances anyways.
I'm so excited that it's Christmas time. Already knowing that we will spend Christmas Eve with Family Clean and Christmas day with my family takes away the stress of trying to figure out what the plan is. Mr. Clean and Girl Clean worked on ornaments for the families on Saturday. He found little wooden ornaments and got spray glue and glitter and we set her at the kitchen table and let her decorate her ornaments to give everyone. Yes there was glitter everywhere but it was a fun memory!!!
I know that trying to fit a workout in at lunch is just not do-able I sweat which means I would need a shower, and that is going to require more than a 1 hour lunch. It could be worse though. My commute allows me more time in the evening then a normal 8-5 schedule so I'm thankful!
I have 2 thank you notes to write to the ladies who did the cakes for the wedding. These hang over my head and I want to get those written this weekend.
MFT is coming up on Sunday and we are going to decorate cookies. I'm very excited about this!!! I plan to get at least 2 visits in before they move to Canada so this is the first time since I found out that they are moving that we were able to set up. I don't think about her move too much because it does make me cry.
I've been researching races for the next few months. December I won't be doing one, and January I haven't found any but I know there will be 2 for February. Both 5K's and one will be the UNCC race and that one is super hilly and I wouldn't run it if it wasn't for my mom. She likes to come cheer me on for that one. I'm hoping Bean and Jelly will run it too!!! Longer races are just not an option for me at this point in time due to the training required. I know that December and January I'm particularly not fond of super long distances anyways.
I'm so excited that it's Christmas time. Already knowing that we will spend Christmas Eve with Family Clean and Christmas day with my family takes away the stress of trying to figure out what the plan is. Mr. Clean and Girl Clean worked on ornaments for the families on Saturday. He found little wooden ornaments and got spray glue and glitter and we set her at the kitchen table and let her decorate her ornaments to give everyone. Yes there was glitter everywhere but it was a fun memory!!!
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
concert, productivity, baby fix
I'm typing fast as I so have too much work to do to be writing.
Last night I met Mr. Clean and we left my car to drive his car over to the Fillmore which is in the Music Factory, which is ridiculously hard to find. The name of the street that mapquest provided no longer exists. If you are going to anything at the Music Factory, basically take 277 to the Graham St exit and then follow the signs, which you have to look for.
Fortunately I looked online yesterday to pull directions and information about the venue. I had read that it was a part of the music factory. I'm so glad that I have an exceptionally decent sense of direction because my husband does not, at all!!!! I did an excellent job of keeping my calm as we navigated out way, because I was able to stay calm he listened to my suggestions and we found where we were going way faster then if I had pulled an attitude and acted ugly. I was super annoyed because we didn't know where we were going, it was 5 o'clock rush hour traffic, and I do not drive uptown, it's way too confusing and stressful.
That said we arrived at Fillmore just as the doors were opening for the VIP tickets. We got inside and found a spot. I was a little concerned about where we were staking our area because it was standing only and I knew that it would become very crowded. I do not do well with crowds pressing in around me.
John Michael McMillan was the first to come on stage, he did a great job! Chris August came on for a few songs, he was wonderful, and super funny. Gunger came on stage next, they will be back in the Spring for a concert and as long as they don't play at a standing only location we will definitely be there. Once they finished their set Chris August came back on. Then David Crowder Band took the stage. There was a bit of a break in between Chris's last set and the DCB. During that time people started pressing in, and I started feeling the heaviness in my chest and the nausea. They had just started and I told Mr. Clean I had to move, and I moved to a less crowded spot back by one of the bars. Because of the panic attack I lost my voice.
DCB did a wonderful job!!! We agreed that while we enjoyed the night and all the performers immensely that will be our last standing only concert.
I knew we would not get in from the concert until late so I planned to arrive at work at 12 today. When I woke up this morning I was able to put a load of laundry in, get gas, go to the gym, came home put the laundry in the dryer, showered, drove to the store where I returned my red box movie (that I meant to take back on Sunday, oops!!!) and picked up dinner for my friend CCH. She and I ran several races together last year including the Charlotte 1/2. She had her little girl last week. I texted and asked if this morning would be a good time to meet little miss K.
I knew that K has plenty of clothes and baby accessories so I decided I would pick up dinner for her mommy and daddy. I got a pork loin, frozen dinner rolls, steamer bag veggies, frozen potato wedges and chocolate chip cookie dough. I couldn't show up empty handed, that just won't do when there is a new baby to celebrate!!!
Miss K is gorgeous!!!! Her mommy and daddy are gorgeous so it's no wonder she is. I got to hold her and talk to my friend and the 30 minutes was up way too soon for me but was probably just the right amount of time for me to stay for my friend.
Then I came to work. I work tonight at the restaurant. I have been thinking about Miss K all afternoon!!! She is just so precious!!! It's a very good thing I get another baby fix this weekend!!! The best part, I hand them back!!!
Last night I met Mr. Clean and we left my car to drive his car over to the Fillmore which is in the Music Factory, which is ridiculously hard to find. The name of the street that mapquest provided no longer exists. If you are going to anything at the Music Factory, basically take 277 to the Graham St exit and then follow the signs, which you have to look for.
Fortunately I looked online yesterday to pull directions and information about the venue. I had read that it was a part of the music factory. I'm so glad that I have an exceptionally decent sense of direction because my husband does not, at all!!!! I did an excellent job of keeping my calm as we navigated out way, because I was able to stay calm he listened to my suggestions and we found where we were going way faster then if I had pulled an attitude and acted ugly. I was super annoyed because we didn't know where we were going, it was 5 o'clock rush hour traffic, and I do not drive uptown, it's way too confusing and stressful.
That said we arrived at Fillmore just as the doors were opening for the VIP tickets. We got inside and found a spot. I was a little concerned about where we were staking our area because it was standing only and I knew that it would become very crowded. I do not do well with crowds pressing in around me.
John Michael McMillan was the first to come on stage, he did a great job! Chris August came on for a few songs, he was wonderful, and super funny. Gunger came on stage next, they will be back in the Spring for a concert and as long as they don't play at a standing only location we will definitely be there. Once they finished their set Chris August came back on. Then David Crowder Band took the stage. There was a bit of a break in between Chris's last set and the DCB. During that time people started pressing in, and I started feeling the heaviness in my chest and the nausea. They had just started and I told Mr. Clean I had to move, and I moved to a less crowded spot back by one of the bars. Because of the panic attack I lost my voice.
DCB did a wonderful job!!! We agreed that while we enjoyed the night and all the performers immensely that will be our last standing only concert.
I knew we would not get in from the concert until late so I planned to arrive at work at 12 today. When I woke up this morning I was able to put a load of laundry in, get gas, go to the gym, came home put the laundry in the dryer, showered, drove to the store where I returned my red box movie (that I meant to take back on Sunday, oops!!!) and picked up dinner for my friend CCH. She and I ran several races together last year including the Charlotte 1/2. She had her little girl last week. I texted and asked if this morning would be a good time to meet little miss K.
I knew that K has plenty of clothes and baby accessories so I decided I would pick up dinner for her mommy and daddy. I got a pork loin, frozen dinner rolls, steamer bag veggies, frozen potato wedges and chocolate chip cookie dough. I couldn't show up empty handed, that just won't do when there is a new baby to celebrate!!!
Miss K is gorgeous!!!! Her mommy and daddy are gorgeous so it's no wonder she is. I got to hold her and talk to my friend and the 30 minutes was up way too soon for me but was probably just the right amount of time for me to stay for my friend.
Then I came to work. I work tonight at the restaurant. I have been thinking about Miss K all afternoon!!! She is just so precious!!! It's a very good thing I get another baby fix this weekend!!! The best part, I hand them back!!!
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Thursday
I have been reading blogs this week but MIA totally on commenting. It's been a little crazy. This past Friday night kicked off restaurant week here in Charlotte.
Monday night I worked at the restaurant and since it's July even though it's restaurant week it was slow but not as slow as a normal July Monday night. I got home and I was tired, and ready to go to bed. I took Tuesday off from work since my Godparents are in town but I was waking up regular time to get a run in.
Tuesday morning early Jack Banner and I headed out for a 3 mile run. We got home and took a shower, I made him take a shower because he was starting to smell like a dog. My goal was to be at the dmv at 7:30, I was there at 7:24 I think I was maybe 10th in line for the door. It opens at 8.
8am the door opens, we proceed inside, I'm standing behind a girl who has also just gotten married, and I realize that my drivers license is still in my car because I took it out of my wallet when I had gone on my run earlier. SO I got out of line and went back to my car and got back at the end of the line. What could have been an easy 45 minutes ended up being 2 hours. Hind sight I probably could have asked the guy at the desk if I could just run and get my license real quick but I didn't and it got done so that's what matters.
I drove Jack to my parents house, I was having a girls shopping day with my Godmother and mom. We headed out and we were two stores in when we got a call from my Grandmother that she had fallen. We jumped in the car and headed her way. She bruised herself up and was very shaky but overall she was OK. After this excitement it was after 2pm and I was STARVING. Macadoo's has come to University area in Charlotte and we decided this would be the perfect place for our late lunch.
After a yummy lunch of nachos we decided to drive over to the Talbots outlet and old navy that were less then 5 minutes away. It wasn't quite the girls shopping day that we planned on but it worked out.
Last night I worked at the restaurant. Y'all remember JM, the one I met back in October, the one who I fell HEAD OVER HEELS FOR, the one who is married to his job who dumped me. At the restaurant we were having an event and the group is one he is a member of. I knew that the chance of seeing him was probably 98.9% and sure enough at 5:50 he walked through the door.
My heart pounded, I felt my skin grow hot. Yes I'm married, and yes he dumped me, and I'm so glad that I looked cute yesterday. I smiled, and said hello. We were busy at the front and he needed to go mingle. I noticed that he sat in a spot where he could watch me. The event was in our lounge area and at my restaurant the lounge and restaurant are all open and the hostess stand is visible to all.
When he was leaving he stopped to say good bye and asked if he could email me. This is when I broke the news that I'm married. He asked if he could email just to catch up and I said that would be fine, I know him he won't remember to email he's too tied up with all that's is always going on with his job. I've never met anyone as married to their job as this man is. To me it's rather sad but I do believe that he is happy and very content with how his life is, and I think it's great. I wished that he could have made time for me but it wasn't meant to be.
Here's the other part to this story. What I'm not talking about a lot is that life in the Clean home is definitely an adjustment. There have been some very very tough spots. So seeing the guy who broke my heart, who I last saw October 31, 2010, was jolting for me. I cried the whole way home. When I walked in the door, my husband, being my husband, "wow you look really bad are you OK?". Then he started trying to figure out why I looked the way I did, I had tried to stop crying before I got to a certain point but I hadn't been able to. So when I got home my eyes were still red. It took him a good 10 minutes to put it together that I'd been crying but I do give him points for figuring it out at all.
What happened, once he figured it out, we had a long significant talk. My husband has no idea just how stubborn I can be. I don't choose the easy way, and I didn't when I married him. I knew what I was getting, maybe not quite how difficult but I did understand it would be difficult. I love him, he loves me. I know him and understand him well enough to know how to move forward and learn more. It's a process, not an easy one but I believe that it's worth it and he's worth it.
So life moves forward and tomorrow is Friday and tonight I run. After last nights conversation I feel stronger and hopeful and I got another piece of the puzzle that is my husband. I'm thankful, I'm blessed. Life hands us the unexpected and sometimes it's good and sometimes it's bad but it's life and in reading this week I see in so many of our posts how life isn't always fair but I appreciate how awesome y'all are at finding the positives.
Monday night I worked at the restaurant and since it's July even though it's restaurant week it was slow but not as slow as a normal July Monday night. I got home and I was tired, and ready to go to bed. I took Tuesday off from work since my Godparents are in town but I was waking up regular time to get a run in.
Tuesday morning early Jack Banner and I headed out for a 3 mile run. We got home and took a shower, I made him take a shower because he was starting to smell like a dog. My goal was to be at the dmv at 7:30, I was there at 7:24 I think I was maybe 10th in line for the door. It opens at 8.
8am the door opens, we proceed inside, I'm standing behind a girl who has also just gotten married, and I realize that my drivers license is still in my car because I took it out of my wallet when I had gone on my run earlier. SO I got out of line and went back to my car and got back at the end of the line. What could have been an easy 45 minutes ended up being 2 hours. Hind sight I probably could have asked the guy at the desk if I could just run and get my license real quick but I didn't and it got done so that's what matters.
I drove Jack to my parents house, I was having a girls shopping day with my Godmother and mom. We headed out and we were two stores in when we got a call from my Grandmother that she had fallen. We jumped in the car and headed her way. She bruised herself up and was very shaky but overall she was OK. After this excitement it was after 2pm and I was STARVING. Macadoo's has come to University area in Charlotte and we decided this would be the perfect place for our late lunch.
After a yummy lunch of nachos we decided to drive over to the Talbots outlet and old navy that were less then 5 minutes away. It wasn't quite the girls shopping day that we planned on but it worked out.
Last night I worked at the restaurant. Y'all remember JM, the one I met back in October, the one who I fell HEAD OVER HEELS FOR, the one who is married to his job who dumped me. At the restaurant we were having an event and the group is one he is a member of. I knew that the chance of seeing him was probably 98.9% and sure enough at 5:50 he walked through the door.
My heart pounded, I felt my skin grow hot. Yes I'm married, and yes he dumped me, and I'm so glad that I looked cute yesterday. I smiled, and said hello. We were busy at the front and he needed to go mingle. I noticed that he sat in a spot where he could watch me. The event was in our lounge area and at my restaurant the lounge and restaurant are all open and the hostess stand is visible to all.
When he was leaving he stopped to say good bye and asked if he could email me. This is when I broke the news that I'm married. He asked if he could email just to catch up and I said that would be fine, I know him he won't remember to email he's too tied up with all that's is always going on with his job. I've never met anyone as married to their job as this man is. To me it's rather sad but I do believe that he is happy and very content with how his life is, and I think it's great. I wished that he could have made time for me but it wasn't meant to be.
Here's the other part to this story. What I'm not talking about a lot is that life in the Clean home is definitely an adjustment. There have been some very very tough spots. So seeing the guy who broke my heart, who I last saw October 31, 2010, was jolting for me. I cried the whole way home. When I walked in the door, my husband, being my husband, "wow you look really bad are you OK?". Then he started trying to figure out why I looked the way I did, I had tried to stop crying before I got to a certain point but I hadn't been able to. So when I got home my eyes were still red. It took him a good 10 minutes to put it together that I'd been crying but I do give him points for figuring it out at all.
What happened, once he figured it out, we had a long significant talk. My husband has no idea just how stubborn I can be. I don't choose the easy way, and I didn't when I married him. I knew what I was getting, maybe not quite how difficult but I did understand it would be difficult. I love him, he loves me. I know him and understand him well enough to know how to move forward and learn more. It's a process, not an easy one but I believe that it's worth it and he's worth it.
So life moves forward and tomorrow is Friday and tonight I run. After last nights conversation I feel stronger and hopeful and I got another piece of the puzzle that is my husband. I'm thankful, I'm blessed. Life hands us the unexpected and sometimes it's good and sometimes it's bad but it's life and in reading this week I see in so many of our posts how life isn't always fair but I appreciate how awesome y'all are at finding the positives.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
crazy mama and friendship
Last night I worked at the restaurant. One of my coworkers put things in perspective for me when she said well at least it's not your future mother in law who is crazy… She is so right too. I can handle my mom's crazy because I get it and I understand the background of it and I know my Mom. I've never had a bad relationship with anyone's family who I have dated. In fact CF&G's sisters and parents are invited to my wedding. And BT's sister is invited although I know she most likely won't be able to attend. I typically form great friendships and fall in love with families making significant break ups that much more difficult. If Mama Clean was giving us a hard time and being as difficult as how my mom is being I would have such a hard time with that. I can deal with my mama's crazy, even if it is making me want to scream and cry and throw a two year old tantrum!!!
Tomorrow is the day I will go back to the store where I worked in college and pick out my dress. Originally I had plans to go up next week and take my Mom and Mama Clean. Then I found out my other mother, the one who owns the store, would not be there the day I had planned. So I told the Mama's that the trip was off and planned to just drive up on my own. Then I started thinking about it and called my college roommate. She will be travelling with me tomorrow.
She and I worked in the store together, I got her the job. We lived together her 2nd semester freshman year my 2nd semester sophomore year until the time I moved back to Charlotte. We had a huge falling out after I moved out of the apartment and didn't tell anyone I was leaving and it took a few years but we patched things up and our friendship still remains. I think a sign of true friendships is when you have the huge falling outs and then you are still close once you forgive each other.
I was thinking about it and tomorrow will be a full circle day. The place where we experienced life and started our journey into adulthood is where we travel back to for significant life changes. When college roomie and her now husband got married they actually had their ceremony at a little wedding chapel up in the mountains. When I bought my house I travelled up to see Mama D (owner of the store). Starting around 2007 at least once a year College Roomie and I have taken a day and travelled together to visit Mama D and go out to lunch.
It was around this time last year when College Roomie and I had lunch at Chick Fil A with Kbug, her little girl, and I left from there to drive to Durham to see my other college roommate MG. I was struck by the different paths our lives have taken and how different we all are and yet we are all still friends, all still in each other's lives. When I look back and think about all that has happened, where we have gone, what we have seen, I'm amazed at how much takes place in the span of 1 year, 5 years, 10 years. I love that these girls now women are still a part of my life. Despite our vastly different lives we can still sit and talk for hours just like we did when we lived together for that one summer in Boone and we drank way too much and did things that would have made our parents blush!!
Tomorrow is the day I will go back to the store where I worked in college and pick out my dress. Originally I had plans to go up next week and take my Mom and Mama Clean. Then I found out my other mother, the one who owns the store, would not be there the day I had planned. So I told the Mama's that the trip was off and planned to just drive up on my own. Then I started thinking about it and called my college roommate. She will be travelling with me tomorrow.
She and I worked in the store together, I got her the job. We lived together her 2nd semester freshman year my 2nd semester sophomore year until the time I moved back to Charlotte. We had a huge falling out after I moved out of the apartment and didn't tell anyone I was leaving and it took a few years but we patched things up and our friendship still remains. I think a sign of true friendships is when you have the huge falling outs and then you are still close once you forgive each other.
I was thinking about it and tomorrow will be a full circle day. The place where we experienced life and started our journey into adulthood is where we travel back to for significant life changes. When college roomie and her now husband got married they actually had their ceremony at a little wedding chapel up in the mountains. When I bought my house I travelled up to see Mama D (owner of the store). Starting around 2007 at least once a year College Roomie and I have taken a day and travelled together to visit Mama D and go out to lunch.
It was around this time last year when College Roomie and I had lunch at Chick Fil A with Kbug, her little girl, and I left from there to drive to Durham to see my other college roommate MG. I was struck by the different paths our lives have taken and how different we all are and yet we are all still friends, all still in each other's lives. When I look back and think about all that has happened, where we have gone, what we have seen, I'm amazed at how much takes place in the span of 1 year, 5 years, 10 years. I love that these girls now women are still a part of my life. Despite our vastly different lives we can still sit and talk for hours just like we did when we lived together for that one summer in Boone and we drank way too much and did things that would have made our parents blush!!
Thursday, April 21, 2011
This week
I was driving in to work this morning and David Crowder Band's song Shine played as I listened I reflected on what has been going on this week.
Sunday morning I was up at 5:15 and out the door a little bit later for a 4 mile run. It was wonderful. Then I drove up to Mr. Clean's and we went to church followed by errands followed by lunch with his family. His car battery light was flashing and understandably he was stressed because warning lights flashing in the car mean money is going to be spent.
Monday morning I got a text from Mr. Clean that his car would not start and he was using his Dad's car. He drives all day long for work so not having a car is not an option. Monday night my Dad's youngest brother and his family arrived from California. The last time I saw my 2 cousins K was 6 and J was 2 1/2. K is now 24 and J will be 21 in October. The time I've spent with them I find it interesting our similarities even though we've never spent any time together. I had dinner with them and plans were made for Tuesday.
Tuesday morning I woke up and went for an awesome run. Mr. Clean let me know what was going on with his car, an alternator replacement and fixing the wheels. His car is no longer new and there have been a lot of things that have had to be fixed over the past few months. I got home from my run and was stepping in the shower when my mom called. My Dad had gone in to have his leg looked at. Last week his leg was swelling and my mom got on his case to go to the doctor. He finally went and then the doctor sent him in for imaging. Tuesday morning he went to the imaging appointment and the first person to look told my Dad that someone else needed to review the images because it looked like a clot. My mom couldn't really talk, and told me she would let me know when she knew. She was frustrated he hadn't gone sooner and I told her at least he went and quit putting it off.
I texted PMG and BK, both I grew up, both's parents are my friends parents and then I also texted my Godsister to have her notify my Godparents. I realized that morning how blessed I am. My mom couldn't make the phone calls, she couldn't talk, but I could put the word out to my friends, knowing that they would let their parents know and that the prayers would begin. We have been in each other's lives our whole lives and as I prepare for my upcoming marriage I'm made more aware of how blessed I am by the friendships that my family has. Sure there are moments when it stresses me out because these friendships are so much like family that the line is blurred but in times such as Tuesday morning what a blessing to know that there were many prayers being offered for my Dad.
After the second person/doctor looked at the information my Dad was given two shots to give himself and blood thinner medication and sent home with instructions to elevate his leg. I sent the update text to make sure I let everyone know what the result was.
Tuesday after my shower I had time to give Jack a bath, clean my bathroom, vacuum the house and get ready for shopping with the CA girls and my Mom, the plan, to find my Mom's dress for the wedding. They arrived at my condo sometime before 2 and we went to the mall and found Mom's dress in the 2nd store we went to. I found my Easter dress and a dress for my bridal shower. When discussing lunch options my cousin J wanted California Pizza Kitchen, her reason, no one ever wants to go when they are actually in CA. I was pleasantly surprised! After a disgusting frozen pizza several years ago I didn't think I would ever have any desire to try this place. The restaurant has so many options and my roasted vegetable salad was amazing!!!
I had to work the restaurant Tuesday night so they dropped me off at the house. Tuesday night was insanely busy, our patio was hopping!! I talked to Mr. Clean and his car was supposed to have been ready yesterday. It was going to be a lot of money but it was supposed to be fixed.
Yesterday I got a text that one of the girls who works with Mr. Clean was out sick, meaning that the amount of work they had to do was going to be insane. I had to work at the restaurant last night and let my manager know that he needs to begin looking for the next me. I explained I will be moving and I'm not leaving him but he does need to start looking for my replacement. I figure I’m giving him plenty of time and I told him he can keep me on as fill in for as long as he needs. Last night was much slower then Tuesday but still a good crowd for a week night!
I expected that Mr. Clean would already be asleep by the time I got off work but he wasn't. He called me, and it was evident he was not ok. Turns out the place that was supposed to fix his car, messed up in a very big way. The type of car he has you can not ever let it lose power and the individual working on his car let it lose power then didn't tell anyone then tried to say the car was fixed. I'm surprised that Mr. Clean didn't have a stroke to be perfectly honest. The insane amount of stress he's under because of all this is downright scary. I've been praying continually because I know how much the one factor of not having the car is affecting everything else. I let him talk, and let him talk. As he talked I prayed. I asked what I could do. I listened. As the conversation went on there was a noticeable unwinding, uncoiling, and while he was still on edge it was not the same as when we first started talking. By the time we hung up, it was late and I continued to pray. On top of what happened with the car yesterday morning he dropped his phone and it shattered. It is currently taped together.
For me when I have so much happen I want someone to just tell me they will fix it. I want to just fix it all for him and I can't. The most powerful thing I have to offer is my prayers.
Thankfully while the situation with my Dad was scary, I fully believe that this clot will dissolve. Thankfully my restaurant manager is excited for me and will work with me over these next few weeks since I will be taking so many days off so I can get tasks accomplished. Thankfully in my own day to day requirements I'm not as stressed. I still have A TON of work at my day job and I still have A LOT to get done but I'm not in personal crisis and that helps me be there for Mr. Clean and for my parents.
This week I have been reminded of 2 scripture verses.
John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 "But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
Sunday morning I was up at 5:15 and out the door a little bit later for a 4 mile run. It was wonderful. Then I drove up to Mr. Clean's and we went to church followed by errands followed by lunch with his family. His car battery light was flashing and understandably he was stressed because warning lights flashing in the car mean money is going to be spent.
Monday morning I got a text from Mr. Clean that his car would not start and he was using his Dad's car. He drives all day long for work so not having a car is not an option. Monday night my Dad's youngest brother and his family arrived from California. The last time I saw my 2 cousins K was 6 and J was 2 1/2. K is now 24 and J will be 21 in October. The time I've spent with them I find it interesting our similarities even though we've never spent any time together. I had dinner with them and plans were made for Tuesday.
Tuesday morning I woke up and went for an awesome run. Mr. Clean let me know what was going on with his car, an alternator replacement and fixing the wheels. His car is no longer new and there have been a lot of things that have had to be fixed over the past few months. I got home from my run and was stepping in the shower when my mom called. My Dad had gone in to have his leg looked at. Last week his leg was swelling and my mom got on his case to go to the doctor. He finally went and then the doctor sent him in for imaging. Tuesday morning he went to the imaging appointment and the first person to look told my Dad that someone else needed to review the images because it looked like a clot. My mom couldn't really talk, and told me she would let me know when she knew. She was frustrated he hadn't gone sooner and I told her at least he went and quit putting it off.
I texted PMG and BK, both I grew up, both's parents are my friends parents and then I also texted my Godsister to have her notify my Godparents. I realized that morning how blessed I am. My mom couldn't make the phone calls, she couldn't talk, but I could put the word out to my friends, knowing that they would let their parents know and that the prayers would begin. We have been in each other's lives our whole lives and as I prepare for my upcoming marriage I'm made more aware of how blessed I am by the friendships that my family has. Sure there are moments when it stresses me out because these friendships are so much like family that the line is blurred but in times such as Tuesday morning what a blessing to know that there were many prayers being offered for my Dad.
After the second person/doctor looked at the information my Dad was given two shots to give himself and blood thinner medication and sent home with instructions to elevate his leg. I sent the update text to make sure I let everyone know what the result was.
Tuesday after my shower I had time to give Jack a bath, clean my bathroom, vacuum the house and get ready for shopping with the CA girls and my Mom, the plan, to find my Mom's dress for the wedding. They arrived at my condo sometime before 2 and we went to the mall and found Mom's dress in the 2nd store we went to. I found my Easter dress and a dress for my bridal shower. When discussing lunch options my cousin J wanted California Pizza Kitchen, her reason, no one ever wants to go when they are actually in CA. I was pleasantly surprised! After a disgusting frozen pizza several years ago I didn't think I would ever have any desire to try this place. The restaurant has so many options and my roasted vegetable salad was amazing!!!
I had to work the restaurant Tuesday night so they dropped me off at the house. Tuesday night was insanely busy, our patio was hopping!! I talked to Mr. Clean and his car was supposed to have been ready yesterday. It was going to be a lot of money but it was supposed to be fixed.
Yesterday I got a text that one of the girls who works with Mr. Clean was out sick, meaning that the amount of work they had to do was going to be insane. I had to work at the restaurant last night and let my manager know that he needs to begin looking for the next me. I explained I will be moving and I'm not leaving him but he does need to start looking for my replacement. I figure I’m giving him plenty of time and I told him he can keep me on as fill in for as long as he needs. Last night was much slower then Tuesday but still a good crowd for a week night!
I expected that Mr. Clean would already be asleep by the time I got off work but he wasn't. He called me, and it was evident he was not ok. Turns out the place that was supposed to fix his car, messed up in a very big way. The type of car he has you can not ever let it lose power and the individual working on his car let it lose power then didn't tell anyone then tried to say the car was fixed. I'm surprised that Mr. Clean didn't have a stroke to be perfectly honest. The insane amount of stress he's under because of all this is downright scary. I've been praying continually because I know how much the one factor of not having the car is affecting everything else. I let him talk, and let him talk. As he talked I prayed. I asked what I could do. I listened. As the conversation went on there was a noticeable unwinding, uncoiling, and while he was still on edge it was not the same as when we first started talking. By the time we hung up, it was late and I continued to pray. On top of what happened with the car yesterday morning he dropped his phone and it shattered. It is currently taped together.
For me when I have so much happen I want someone to just tell me they will fix it. I want to just fix it all for him and I can't. The most powerful thing I have to offer is my prayers.
Thankfully while the situation with my Dad was scary, I fully believe that this clot will dissolve. Thankfully my restaurant manager is excited for me and will work with me over these next few weeks since I will be taking so many days off so I can get tasks accomplished. Thankfully in my own day to day requirements I'm not as stressed. I still have A TON of work at my day job and I still have A LOT to get done but I'm not in personal crisis and that helps me be there for Mr. Clean and for my parents.
This week I have been reminded of 2 scripture verses.
John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 "But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
Friday, March 18, 2011
This week and up and coming
Last night instead of a run I went into my extra room and found the floor. I had Christmas wrapping paper and leftover boxes, I had the suitcase from Vegas (don't judge) I had baby gifts that needed to be shipped, it was a mess!!! I was motivated because MG will be here Saturday with her boyfriend and although I offered my bed they are bringing their air mattress.
I need a roommate and I'm still actively searching but I also really love having a catch all room. There are still nails in the walls from the previous roommate so I hung some pictures in there to make the walls look less bare. I try to keep the room roommate ready so I don't have to haul a whole lot out of there when/if I do find someone.
I'm amazed at how this week has flown and I shouldn't be but I am. I blinked and it's Friday!! My family from PA is coming to town next weekend and will meet Mr. Clean. I'm so excited that they are meeting him. We have shopping plans Friday, then Saturday they have plans with other Charlotte friends so I have some time to spend with Mr. Clean and then I'll go to church with him Saturday night. Then Sunday I'll go to the church I've been going to but my whole family will be coming with me, I’m so excited about this!! After church we'll have lunch at Mom and Dad's and I'm hoping Mr. Clean and Baby Girl will join us.
Then the next week is my trip to DC. Lisa (who I've never met but I consider a wonderful friend) and I are running the Cherry Blossom 10 miler. I get the opportunity to spend time with my friend Jess, and hoping she takes me up on the offer to help her some while I’m there. I think I might also get to meet Becky and possibly Mandy (I am pretty sure) and I'm super excited to meet these girls!!!
This week I found out that my Dad's youngest brother and his family are coming out from Southern CA. This is going to be the week before Easter. I haven't seen my 2 cousins since I was 12 and they were 2 and 6 or something like that. I'm really looking forward to the opportunity to get to know them!! There are just so many things happening and I will try to remember to take pictures, or steal pictures!!
I need a roommate and I'm still actively searching but I also really love having a catch all room. There are still nails in the walls from the previous roommate so I hung some pictures in there to make the walls look less bare. I try to keep the room roommate ready so I don't have to haul a whole lot out of there when/if I do find someone.
I'm amazed at how this week has flown and I shouldn't be but I am. I blinked and it's Friday!! My family from PA is coming to town next weekend and will meet Mr. Clean. I'm so excited that they are meeting him. We have shopping plans Friday, then Saturday they have plans with other Charlotte friends so I have some time to spend with Mr. Clean and then I'll go to church with him Saturday night. Then Sunday I'll go to the church I've been going to but my whole family will be coming with me, I’m so excited about this!! After church we'll have lunch at Mom and Dad's and I'm hoping Mr. Clean and Baby Girl will join us.
Then the next week is my trip to DC. Lisa (who I've never met but I consider a wonderful friend) and I are running the Cherry Blossom 10 miler. I get the opportunity to spend time with my friend Jess, and hoping she takes me up on the offer to help her some while I’m there. I think I might also get to meet Becky and possibly Mandy (I am pretty sure) and I'm super excited to meet these girls!!!
This week I found out that my Dad's youngest brother and his family are coming out from Southern CA. This is going to be the week before Easter. I haven't seen my 2 cousins since I was 12 and they were 2 and 6 or something like that. I'm really looking forward to the opportunity to get to know them!! There are just so many things happening and I will try to remember to take pictures, or steal pictures!!
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Focus
This weekend has been full. Friday night I worked til close. Saturday night I worked til volume so it was around 9 something when I left. I was going to try for a long run yesterday morning. After working til 11 on Friday night I was still exhausted when I woke up on Saturday. I got 4.5 miles in and my knees hurt and I hurt and I stopped. I ran 12 last Saturday. I run a 10K this coming Saturday. I figure I will give my body a break. If I have to walk some during the 1/2 then I walk some. I'll run it and get it over with. Yesterday I also found out that my roommate will most likely be moving at the end of this month. Which that's her prerogative and she did offer to give me some money since it is short notice. I declined. I know that she's fallen in love with this place that she's found and if all goes well she'll move in the next week or 2. I'll miss her but if she's ready to go she's ready to go.
This morning I took Jack Banner for a walk. This was in the hope of wearing him out. I drove down to Gaffney, SC to meet up with MFT for a little lunch and shopping. Her birthday is the 28th of this month and I wanted to make a day for her. So we had Mexican for lunch and then walked around the outlet. It was so nice to have that girl time and she found some great deals. I drove home and Jack Banner was all wound up. So I called up my mom and she invited us over. She and I were talking about various things and she made the comment that since S and I broke up I seem to lack focus.
This rubbed me the wrong way. I told her I disagreed. I've done a lot of processing this summer. I've worked this summer. I've done fun things this summer. I have not lacked focus. I do not understand where that comment came from. I've felt that I've been doing really well and moving along with my life. I've been trying to live life and let go of things. I haven't been in church as often because there were a few Sunday's where I had to work or something had come up. Her comment was that I was avoiding church. I wasn't avoiding church I only have so much time and Sunday is my only free day out of 7 and the church I go to the service last for 2 hours and sometimes more it goes from 10-12, that's a long time. So now I'm trying to let this comment go. I don't lack focus and I don't understand what she meant and she couldn't really elaborate.
I am frustrated that I'm so upset over it. Perhaps because I've always jumped right into another relationship and kept pushing to find someone to marry me and because I haven't done that this time she thinks I'm not focused? But she knows that I've specifically taken a break from dating. I don't know like I said I have to let it go. I'm stressed at the short notice by the roommate, I'm not sure how this next month is going to work out, I have a huge test coming up in a few weeks and if I don't pass then I don't get reimbursed. My mom tried to go over my money with me tonight to figure out where it goes, this was just so incredibly depressing and I just had to end the conversation. She wants to know why I haven't paid anything down having the roommate and I pointed out that the roommate has only been here since July and in July I had to pay to have the air fixed and in August I had birthday stuff and then in September it's all gone to various bills. I haven't tithed in months and she got on my case about that and understand that when you don't tithe you're stealing from God because it's all His anyways but there's nothing there to give. It's a vicious cycle.
Not to end this one on an incredibly depressing note I'm going to come up with something positive. I had a wonderful time with one of my very dear friends today and she loved the pajama set that I gave her. I shared my post via email with PMG (she doesn't read the blog) and she loved it and appreciated it. I'm so proud of her not only has she earned her first car with MK she's just about got her 2nd one, she's just amazing!!! Jack Banner got in some wonderful quality time with the Grandparents. I only have 2 more weeks til my 13.1 in Atlanta and once that's over then I will figure out another way to work out so I can actually lose weight. I'm looking forward to staying with my friend while I'm there and catching up with her. I know that God is bigger and despite how I feel right now He really is in control and really does have a plan for my life.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Work out, Mini Vacation, Old friends
I had today and I have tomorrow off from both jobs. Traditionally this would be the week that my Grandparents and then my Grandmom have rented a house for a week at Topsail Island, NC. This year my Grandmother decided that instead of the beach she would like to spend a week down at our lake house.
Last night I was able to fit in a run and strength training. Lunges, Squats, arms, etc. Followed by a decent 4 mile run. After the disappointing run on Saturday I was glad to be able to get a better 4 miles in last night. I packed and was ready to leave early this morning.
Bright and early (7) I left my house to travel down. Mom was at the gate when I arrived and she was getting ready for her walk. She waited while I changed clothes and we went on a walk with Jack Banner. After the walk we had a nice dip in the lake followed by breakfast. My friend MFT was coming up around lunch and bringing my nephew. She arrived and Mom and Grandmommy met W for the first time. They LOVE him! He's such a little doll and we had so much fun talking and catching up. Jack Banner was super jealous of W, we had to keep him on a leash pretty much the whole time.
MFT and I have been friends for 23 years, we realized that today at lunch. We met when we were 7 years old. I have felt so blessed today to realize the friendships I have, the Mom and Grandmother (and family) that I have. I often times become so focused on what I don't have or what's not right that I forget about the blessing that I do have!
Monday, July 26, 2010
Night out, Amazing Food, Changes
My last post I said we were enjoying pina coladas and a night in. Well then Miss K gets a text from her friend Miss V and says, we've been invited to just go hang out with Miss V at a friend's house. It wasn't too far away and I figured why not? We both knew we had no money, at all, to spend but hanging out at a house would be fine. We arrived, and a card game was going on. There was a girl at the house who I actually graduated from college with. Charlotte can be so incredibly small!
I did not wear shoes that were great for walking. I did not realize how much walking I would be doing on Saturday night and I am paying for that today!! At some point it was suggested that we go to Thomas St Tavern. So we go, and it was fun. Then we decided to wander over to Whiskey Warehouse, which is behind Thomas St. It was a night that didn't end until 2 in the morning. We cabbed it home. I had sworn up and down that I wasn't going to go out this weekend. The only money I spent was on the cab, so in that regard I am pleased that I didn't overspend. I have to admit I had fun and while we had fun I definitely plan to stay in next weekend!
Sunday I had my restaurant party. Our general manager hosts an employee appreciation party and makes the most incredible food I've ever tasted! Everything was homemade. We had brisket, mac and cheese, potato salad, slaw, salsas, red beans and rice, tomatoes, and fruit salad. Seriously it was all so amazing!!! After all that food I came home and took Jack for a walk. It was hot but I needed to stretch my legs!
I've gone out every weekend for the past 3 weeks. I have had fun and I have no regrets. I am tired though! I think maybe because of all the changes that are happening I feel overwhelmed. I broke up with S, which this was a good thing. I was so frustrated and irritated all the time. His honesty after I broke up with him allowed me the freedom of knowing that I absolutely did the right thing. My restaurant job is ending because they are closing. I've loved this job, I would have been there 2 years in September. I'm so incredibly thankful to have a new restaurant hostessing gig lined up. At the same time I feel uncertainty and insecurity. I have to go into a new place, I have to learn a new restaurant flow, I have to step outside of my comfort zone yet again. Will they work with my schedule, will I feel as comfortable, all the unknown and what if terrify me sometimes. Other times I'm just fine. I do believe that it will be a great restaurant to work at and I'm looking forward to the change. I'm turning 31 in just a few weeks. Lisa sent me a GREAT article about how women are considered most attractive at 31. I appreciated this! I honestly am trying to not let it get to me. I have specifically decided not to date until after my birthday. Otherwise I would be putting ridiculous pressure on myself and I don't need to do that. I would rather be single then in the wrong relationship. I do have to let go of a lot of things and that is very hard for me to do!
I have 2 days off tomorrow and Wednesday. The plan is to go down to the lake house to spend time with my Mom and Grandmother. MFT is bringing W up to meet my Mom and Grandmother for the first time (yes he's going to be 2 in November and they are just now meeting him). It hadn't worked out for a visit before. I'm excited to see her and W. MFT is one of my oldest friends and I refer to W as my nephew but there is no blood relation. Then after I leave Wednesday I go meet up with Jess, so excited about this visit!!
I'm hoping I can get a run in tonight and a run in on Wednesday and then I need to do 9 miles on Saturday. This past Saturday's race was so miserable!!! I have to let go of the bad memories of it and hope that next Saturday will be a beautiful effortless run!! I really need to figure out how to set up my ipod so that I have music to run with. This no music thing is absolutely getting to me! I've run for so long without it but I know that if I would actually make myself figure it out I would have such a better time running!
"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19
I did not wear shoes that were great for walking. I did not realize how much walking I would be doing on Saturday night and I am paying for that today!! At some point it was suggested that we go to Thomas St Tavern. So we go, and it was fun. Then we decided to wander over to Whiskey Warehouse, which is behind Thomas St. It was a night that didn't end until 2 in the morning. We cabbed it home. I had sworn up and down that I wasn't going to go out this weekend. The only money I spent was on the cab, so in that regard I am pleased that I didn't overspend. I have to admit I had fun and while we had fun I definitely plan to stay in next weekend!
Sunday I had my restaurant party. Our general manager hosts an employee appreciation party and makes the most incredible food I've ever tasted! Everything was homemade. We had brisket, mac and cheese, potato salad, slaw, salsas, red beans and rice, tomatoes, and fruit salad. Seriously it was all so amazing!!! After all that food I came home and took Jack for a walk. It was hot but I needed to stretch my legs!
I've gone out every weekend for the past 3 weeks. I have had fun and I have no regrets. I am tired though! I think maybe because of all the changes that are happening I feel overwhelmed. I broke up with S, which this was a good thing. I was so frustrated and irritated all the time. His honesty after I broke up with him allowed me the freedom of knowing that I absolutely did the right thing. My restaurant job is ending because they are closing. I've loved this job, I would have been there 2 years in September. I'm so incredibly thankful to have a new restaurant hostessing gig lined up. At the same time I feel uncertainty and insecurity. I have to go into a new place, I have to learn a new restaurant flow, I have to step outside of my comfort zone yet again. Will they work with my schedule, will I feel as comfortable, all the unknown and what if terrify me sometimes. Other times I'm just fine. I do believe that it will be a great restaurant to work at and I'm looking forward to the change. I'm turning 31 in just a few weeks. Lisa sent me a GREAT article about how women are considered most attractive at 31. I appreciated this! I honestly am trying to not let it get to me. I have specifically decided not to date until after my birthday. Otherwise I would be putting ridiculous pressure on myself and I don't need to do that. I would rather be single then in the wrong relationship. I do have to let go of a lot of things and that is very hard for me to do!
I have 2 days off tomorrow and Wednesday. The plan is to go down to the lake house to spend time with my Mom and Grandmother. MFT is bringing W up to meet my Mom and Grandmother for the first time (yes he's going to be 2 in November and they are just now meeting him). It hadn't worked out for a visit before. I'm excited to see her and W. MFT is one of my oldest friends and I refer to W as my nephew but there is no blood relation. Then after I leave Wednesday I go meet up with Jess, so excited about this visit!!
I'm hoping I can get a run in tonight and a run in on Wednesday and then I need to do 9 miles on Saturday. This past Saturday's race was so miserable!!! I have to let go of the bad memories of it and hope that next Saturday will be a beautiful effortless run!! I really need to figure out how to set up my ipod so that I have music to run with. This no music thing is absolutely getting to me! I've run for so long without it but I know that if I would actually make myself figure it out I would have such a better time running!
"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Sunday
So the air guy showed up yesterday after 7. I had a clogged drain for my AC thing.. The unit needed freon (sp?) so he filled it up. I need to have it checked to find out where the leak is. After he left K and I chilled and watched "Whatever Happened to the Morgans?" It was the movie with Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker. I really liked it, it was funny and sweet!! Then I started her watching SATC, she's never seen them. Today I woke up and went for my long run. 7 miles went very smoothly and I was loving the weather this morning!!
Today is my Grandmother's 82nd birthday. She is so amazing and I love her and I'm so glad that we celebrated another birthday today!! She was so cute having all of us down there!! We had ribs, 2 kinds of slaw, pasta salad, fresh tomatoes, corn (my cousin fixed it in butter and sugar so I passed on this) and my Mom's monkey bread which is the best stuff EVER!!! Then she wanted strawberry cake for her birthday cake so my aunt made that. The food was delicious, I try to avoid ribs so I had a bite and passed the rest of mine off to my brother who was beside me. He and Jelly had the wedding CD so I got to see ALL the pictures of the wedding!!!! SO fabulous!!! I do wish I would have taken my dress back and had them fix the top part. I was pretty uncomfortable trying to dance and make sure I didn't come out of the top of my dress, it came off me by about an inch and I had to be really careful! Fortunately in the pictures you only see the gap a few times.
My family took the news of the breakup well. They say better to find out now then later. The thing is I was surrounded by my family and I thought about the fact that I love them all so much (no my family is not perfect and we have our dramas but I love them) and I was just insulted by the fact that S compared my family to his old bosses family that was the most insulting comparison he ever could have made and my family is absolutely nothing like that and just shows me once again what an uncommunicative jerk he was. I was thankful that my family was so understanding. The line about dating him for social status or position, ummm ok he's met my family and should have known better than that but whatever. I realized today that this past week is typically the week where I'm plagued by horrible PMS except this month I was just fine, nothing, I felt totally normal. Interestingly I feel happy and relaxed and I'm glad that I have someone to hang out with and watch movies with and go out with. I'm probably going to be going to Annapolis with my brother and Jelly in August and I'm super excited about this!! Things have a way of working out for the best and this is definitely one of those time!!!
Thursday, May 6, 2010
May in NC
I love this time of year. The pollen that was turning everything yellow has finally gone. At one point it was so bad that the parking lot where I work literally had standing pollen dust. Apparently the reason for the excess pollen was because we had a heat wave that caused everything to bloom all at the same time instead of over the course of a few weeks. It's actually hot outside today, 90. I walked out on my lunch and I was surprised by the heat. I don't mind it, we'll have cooler days before the absolute heat of summertime hits.
My family's lake house is now open and hopefully I'll be able to get down there to lay out on the dock soon. I love the fact that there is more time in the evening to go for a run before it gets dark. I have to figure out a way to increase my pace outside and be able to track it the way I do on a treadmill. I signed up for my next 5K on May 22 and my goal is to be at or below a 9 minute mile. The nice thing about 5k's is they are WAY less expensive than the the longer races. I realized that I needed to take a step back from the distance running in order to move forward again. I'm thinking that the 1/2 marathon in Charlotte in November will be my next long run. This give me all summer to train for it. S is debating whether or not he wants his first full marathon to be local or in Miami. I'm hoping for another trip to Miami =)
He leaves tomorrow for the Grand Rapids 25K. I will be working at the restaurant. It's turning out to be a crazy busy weekend despite the fact that I'm not joining him in MI as originally planned.
This month that we're only 6 days into is going to go by so fast. Last weekend was the wedding, this weekend is work, next weekend is the pirate themed turning 29 for the second time birthday party for my friend MG. The weekend after that is my 5K and the following weekend is Memorial day and then we are in June. Hopefully over Memorial day weekend I can make it down to the afore mentioned lake house!!
My brother and his wife are honeymooning in St. Thomas, my parents took a week to go to the OuterBanks. I got to come home and go to work... However I was in Miami in January when they were all stuck in cold snowy NC!
My family's lake house is now open and hopefully I'll be able to get down there to lay out on the dock soon. I love the fact that there is more time in the evening to go for a run before it gets dark. I have to figure out a way to increase my pace outside and be able to track it the way I do on a treadmill. I signed up for my next 5K on May 22 and my goal is to be at or below a 9 minute mile. The nice thing about 5k's is they are WAY less expensive than the the longer races. I realized that I needed to take a step back from the distance running in order to move forward again. I'm thinking that the 1/2 marathon in Charlotte in November will be my next long run. This give me all summer to train for it. S is debating whether or not he wants his first full marathon to be local or in Miami. I'm hoping for another trip to Miami =)
He leaves tomorrow for the Grand Rapids 25K. I will be working at the restaurant. It's turning out to be a crazy busy weekend despite the fact that I'm not joining him in MI as originally planned.
This month that we're only 6 days into is going to go by so fast. Last weekend was the wedding, this weekend is work, next weekend is the pirate themed turning 29 for the second time birthday party for my friend MG. The weekend after that is my 5K and the following weekend is Memorial day and then we are in June. Hopefully over Memorial day weekend I can make it down to the afore mentioned lake house!!
My brother and his wife are honeymooning in St. Thomas, my parents took a week to go to the OuterBanks. I got to come home and go to work... However I was in Miami in January when they were all stuck in cold snowy NC!
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